I got to thinking tonight about the relationship I'm in with this girl. I'll give a little bit of a back story so y'all know whats up
Two years ago I got back from working in Alaska (I was 16 at the time) I had gone there to earn money (15$/hour on the Northface doing dishes for my uncle..) to help my family get off the streets (We lived in an RV and parked in Walmart lots while I walked to a bus stop to go to school)
My first day back from the airport, my mother took me to check out a place.
As we pulled into the driveway of the home I realized it was the home of a girl I had ridden the bus with the school year before. Her house is 2 in 1 pretty much.
I got out of the car and started walking my way towards the house, thinking she had moved. But to my surprise she came running out to give me a big hug. I was in a relationship with another girl at the time, long distance, and we were coming up on our year anniversary so a relationship with her never really hit me.
I've never really had a set of rules about when or how to say "I love you" to someone. I've only said it meaningfully to one person, the girl I was in a relationship with prior to meeting the current one. She had said it first, and I was iffy at first but started to return the saying to her.
Anyways, I've lived with this girl for 2 years. Her room is above mine, and I can hear her dancing around and stuff listening to her music. It makes my heart happy. We didn't start really telling each other about our feelings until September 28th of last year. Since then we've gotten a lot more serious. We haven't told either of our parents for fear of how they will treat us because of it. But we go to the park and such, and have long talks about life. I sneak out into her room at night when her parents go out to the beach. We sleep together.
We got jobs together recently at a store to help our families be able to pay rent. We've taken some long strides together that I'm proud of. Shes a wonderful person, and lives in a rather harsh family environment. Shes adopted, and has a brother with severe autism/behavioral disorder.
We were laying together the other day and she told me that no one had ever told her they loved her and meant it. That included her adopted parents. It made me have a sad inside, and I wanted to tell her I love you so bad, but I didn't. I wanted to say it in a special moment so she would know unquestionably that I meant it with all my heart.
So heres my question. When is right to tell someone you love them? Should you wait for a special moment? Or really, is every moment you have with him/her a special moment in itself that you can create? Do you save those words for that "one person" that will one day come along and sweep you?
I personally think throughout life I will have love, of different magnitudes and conditions for different people. I could honestly say I have loved 2 women in my life and be okay with that.
How do you all perceive these words?