Why do people hate kids?

[Voolawl]

I fear for my sisters kid (3 years old now). I see her trying hard to raise him well, but I think she (and her husband) are doing a few mistakes. They have never hit the kid (I'm sure of this), no matter what he does, and always try to talk sense into him. This is good, but they threaten (take away toys, no dessert, etc.) the kid when he is doing something bad WAY too often without actually doing anything. The kid doesn't give a fuck, they aren't going to do anything anyway, except maybe give a hard speech about not doing it in the future.

Think a few slaps would be in order the next time he goes berserk. Maybe he would think twice about not hitting his mother (doesn't do it often, luckily) when he has experienced what being hit actually feels like.

That's what parents these days are lacking imo. When I was growing up, my parents had a wooden spoon for each kid in the house(there were 4 of us), and if we really stepped out of line, we got one good whack with that. It took me one time of really messing up and feeling that stinging, and that wooden spoon never had to come out again. Empty threats won't work on any child old enough to realize that they're empty. Give them a good whack when they're out of line, and that's what will keep them behaved.

[Jaingo]

1: Because society on an individual level is becoming more self centered and lazy.
2: Because kids (of all ages) are raised worse today than they used to be. The more misbehaved children people see in public, the less they like the idea of having kids themselves.

Also as a guy, I hope to one day have multiple children.

Best answer. Children are a DIRECT reflection of their parents, so let's batter the sorry parents out there that fail on a daily basis.

[TheOne]

I hate kids that are little brats with no manners, which means I hate their parents just as much. Kids that are well behaved, I have no problems at all with.

This guy gets it. The problem is that the little brats with no manners that have bad parents MASSIVELY outnumber the kids that are well behaved.

[Deleted]

i like kids.



when they sleep.

[Loaf Lord]

I don't hate kids. I find them incredibly annoying, but not hate. That being said, I despise parents who don't raise their children right or abuse them.

[Etherius]

The way I see it, most who say they hate kids is similar to that of people saying "I hate everyone" - seems to happen when the problem or cause is present. It's likely not as bad as it may sound.

Being annoyed by them? More probable. I don't exactly like hearing high-pitched screaming and running (it happens a lot upstairs), but I'm not going to yell at them for it, and yes, most of us did this, too. I just imagine a post about kids who 'hate' sitting at their grandparents talking about their day or "stories of old", because when you're a kid, most of us don't find that level of socializing fun.

And to anyone who's talking about kids of today being a problem? Hah! This isn't entirely new, parents/adults of every generation will look at younger generations like they're so spoiled rotten, selfish or rude. Dem whippersnappers!

[Killmaim Deathbringer]

You still have not answered WHY you HATE them? (if you do, that is)

Hate is a strong word, but I do DISLIKE them, their grubby, dirty, sticky bogey encrusted hands, touching my things. They scream and cry when they don't get what they want (Granted, that's mainly the parents fault for not teaching them discipline), and they climb on EVERYTHING.

I like solitude, being alone with me, myself and I, is what I call heaven.

[Kasierith]

I have nothing against children themselves; I would, however, have a problem with a significant amount of my time, attention, and energy being focused on another being who is completely dependent on me. Having a child would severely hinder my ambitions in this world.

[PutressFIRST]

I mean, I see people on these forums talking about kids and babys like they are sent from Hell to make their lives miserable.


I am a teacher in training and honestly wtf is wrong with people saying such bad stuff about children. :O

You were a kid too you know.

Of course they can be annoying be they can also be endearing and nice + polite.

Often times I am stunned by what they score on certain tests which I have to check.


And I am a man by the way, so no stereotypical woman who is crazy about kids.

You seem new to the world so let me break it down for you.

Old man Willard is sitting on his porch (circa 1950), some kids are playing kick the can at roughly 6 or 7 p.m. and being a little loud. Old man Willard yells at these kids everyday for doing this making him angry. Fast forward 30 or 40 years when these same kids are the age of Old man Willard just sitting on their porches yelling at some kids everyday for being too loud with their music saying something quotable like "Back in my day." Fast forward even further those kids are now the same age as their counterparts as well as Old man Willard yelling at kids everyday for playing too close to their time machines or whatever (we're in the future now) and so on and so forth. World has worked this way for awhile. But, in my experience most people I know hate kids because of the invention of online gaming and microphones/chat systems.

[Drithien]

I think it's mostly because a lot of people allow themselves to be selfish to such an extent that they can't perceive what is good about kids. See, having a child is a situation where you devote almost, if not, all of your life, your energy, time, focus, everything, to make sure your child(ren) grows up nicely. And you get exactly nothing in return. That seems an alien concept to a lot of people sadly, since they expect their little dog-treats for everything they do, ironically like spoilt little brats.

[Rooflesstoofless]

I've never been socially berated for stating out loud in public that that person's child is being annoying or by telling the parent's of the loud child in a movie theater that they need to quiet their child or leave. I don't make up what society chooses to be socially unacceptable of, but I also don't see any taboo in socially talking bad about children. At least not to the level that it's unacceptable to talk about black people in the same way.

Lack of public berating doesn't imply social acceptability.

I've definitely seen the type of creeps that think they were within their right to tell a parent when their child is being annoying in a public space. Its usually some half-wit who approaches a mother doing the best she can to get through the grocery store in a timely manner and trying to control her kid while making sure she isn't missing half the stuff she came in to get. Might be news to you, but I'm willing to bet that parent is already well aware of how annoying their child can be and you aren't helping the situation at all by creating confrontation for them. Yeah, there are definitely inconsiderate people that breed and that's how you end up with loud kids at a rated R movie at 10:30pm, but that's an exception and not a rule.

You know when people NEVER tell a parent their child is being annoying; even if its to a degree that even the most patience-minded person is losing it? When that annoying child is with a big, scary looking father. It never happens. Makes me think the 'annoyed' crowd's belief in social justice is nothing more than cowardice in practice.

[Daos]

I think it's mostly because a lot of people allow themselves to be selfish to such an extent that they can't perceive what is good about kids. See, having a child is a situation where you devote almost, if not, all of your life, your energy, time, focus, everything, to make sure your child(ren) grows up nicely. And you get exactly nothing in return. That seems an alien concept to a lot of people sadly, since they expect their little dog-treats for everything they do, ironically like spoilt little brats.

So everyone that doesn't want kids, for whatever reason, is a spoiled selfish brat just because they have no interest in the time and energy investment for another being? I would think that anyone who is actually concerned with the well being of children wouldn't want anyone to raise one that isn't interested in the idea, since that's very likely to the kid not getting the attention they deserve. Frankly, there are zero good reasons for anyone to have children who don't want to.

Also, just so it's clear, not being selfless =/= being selfish. Selfless and Selfish are on opposite ends of a spectrum, with a lot of nuance between them.

[Deleted]

Ok annoying brats who waste money and time are one thing but what if your child is diagnosed with a terrible illness? And you can't deal with that shit at all?

How do you deal with that? Hate him or love him?

Resent him or override it?

[Trassk]

I don't hate kids, but speaking as an uncle of a 3 and 1 year old, I've learned for myself what comes from it. I love my two nephews, but its a stress having them round even for a short while. The older one, at 3, runs around banging into things, sticking his fingers in plug sockets and throwing temper tantrums if you ignore him for a second, well the baby, aged 1, cries all the time when he's awake.

I love them, but dam, I've been put off the idea of ever raising kids myself.

[Jayburner]

I love babies. So damn cute.

[Ave07]

I hate kids they destroy everything! Even when i was a kid I did the same and don't want to be the person to deal with it.

[Seirith]

Mainly cause most parents are completly incapable of raising a child. They scream, cry, run around and do not listen to their parents at all.

I agree with you! I was not perfect as a kid but I knew that NO meant no and that having a tantrum got me into more trouble that it was worth. My parents were antique dealers and set up at outside shows all summer long. By 3 years old I knew NO meant NO and DON'T TOUCH really meant DON'T TOUCH . They expected me to behave and I did because they actually parented me and I knew the consequences of not behaving.

Their favorite punishment as soon as I could write was writing sentences, like 100 times which said "I will not touch anything at an antique show because it is not mine." Until ALL sentences were written we could not watch TV, play with friends, talk on the phone etc. We could go to school, church and do chores. I learned pretty darn early to behave LOL.

They also taught me to think of others as well by doing volunteer work which I started doing with them around age 9 or 10. It taught me to really appreciate all the things I had and to learn that there are a lot of people in the world who don't have anything!

[Tziva]

I think it's mostly because a lot of people allow themselves to be selfish to such an extent that they can't perceive what is good about kids. See, having a child is a situation where you devote almost, if not, all of your life, your energy, time, focus, everything, to make sure your child(ren) grows up nicely. And you get exactly nothing in return. That seems an alien concept to a lot of people sadly, since they expect their little dog-treats for everything they do, ironically like spoilt little brats.

As you've said, children are expensive and demanding, and a good parent sacrifices everything for zero physical gain. Does it really surprise anyone that some people want to pass on such an arrangement?

The selfish argument is silly. If you're going to define selfish in the strictest sense to mean making any choice that benefits you personally, then sure, but you should also consider that you can use that sort of extreme definition to classify just about anything in life as selfish -- including deciding to have children just as much as deciding not to.

(Just to be clear, I don't think being a parent is a selfish decision. Quite the opposite - I think the best parents are extremely selfless. I'm just using it as an example of how flexible the interpretation of that word can be)

In practice, "selfish" is a more nuanced word. It holds the connotation of doing something for personal gain that is detrimental to other people in a significant way and is generally reserved for that use. Deciding not to have children is certainly less selfish than many of the mundane choices we make every day - like choosing to buy a new video game instead of donating an extra $40 to charity, or choosing to spent two hours participating in a hobby instead of volunteering. But being childless doesn't harm anyone, but that $40 or two hours of time might have fed a dozen people at a soup kitchen. So if it is selfish, it's still far less selfish than many little choices we make dozens of times a day and think nothing of.

In reality, almost every decision we make in life from the serious to the trivial is done by making a cost:benefit analysis in our head, sometimes consciously, sometimes unconsciously. For you the perceived benefits of raising children outweight the perceived negatives. For me they don't. It's as simple as that. Neither of us should have to defend our choices to the other person, nor should we be attacked for making a different choice to begin with.

I'm not a bad person. I'm not harming anyone. If anything, I'd like to think I am a good person for making a decision to leave parenting up to the people who really passionately love children rather than being just another mediocre parent in world that is already full of too many of those.

People should focus their energy on the plethora of people who have children but neglect or mistreat them. They're the real problem, and they are the real selfish people in this situation.

[drwelfare]

Annoying, I don't like them.

Luckily I'll never have kids

[Deleted]

I don't think I was ever ready to have kids but it was forced on me by cultural society and family to have them