no good reason to get married these days

[Grizzly Willy]

So you can predict the future and say that I might fall in love with someone else? I don't think so. I know myself, I know how to control my emotions. I know that I love my wife and I'll never love anyone more than her. Since I have free will and control of myself I can pull myself out of situations where I might start to have feelings for someone else. Therefore I can tell you with utter confidence that I won't love anyone more than I love my wife.

The point is that neither of you can predict the future, so no, you can't know if you'll keep loving her as much as he can't know that you'll stop loving her.

[Wilian]

Marriage is nothing but a religious tradition tied to culture. The fact it has any legal holding is only a showcase of how pervasive religion is to society even to this date.

It's institution that has long since outlived it's logica purpose and only remains as some sort of emotional milestone that is pushed on inviduals from young age 'til the amen is said.

[Deleted]

I like grape jelly as much as i did when I was a kid.

But it is always possible that you will stop liking it, for unknown reasons.

That's the point some people are making. A possibility, but, just because that there is a possibility, it doesn't mean that it will happen, and people need to keep that in mind, but the opposite might happen too.

Like I said and some others, it's possible to happen, one or the other, and you don't really know which one.

[Woeful]

I like grape jelly as much as i did when I was a kid.

Me too.

But I like my peanut butter crunchier and much thicker than when I was a kid.

[Spectral]

I like grape jelly as much as i did when I was a kid.

Grape jelly doesn't get fat, cheat on you, become a financial or emotional burden, or otherwise change. It just keeps being grape jelly.

[Gamdwelf]

But it is always possible that you will stop liking it, for unknown reasons.

That's the point some people are making. A possibility, but, just because that there is a possibility, it doesn't mean that it will happen, and people need to keep that in mind, but the opposite might happen too.

Like I said and some others, it's possible to happen.

I think that is the difference between just liking somebody and truly loving somebody. Somebody you are truly in love with even when they make you mad or your are frustrated with them etc. You still love them and care about them deeply and will be there for them.

Its like a mother. Even when kids are bad, mother still love children pretty much unconditionally. Obviously there are exceptions but real love I think transcends something fikel like than comparing it to grape jelly.

[Grizzly Willy]

Grape jelly doesn't get fat, cheat on you, become a financial or emotional burden, or otherwise change. It just keeps being grape jelly.

I dunno, that one jar was a cheating harlot.

[Woeful]

Grape jelly doesn't get fat, cheat on you, become a financial or emotional burden, or otherwise change. It just keeps being grape jelly.

That whistling sound was the point going right over...

She will change. But so will you. You might start liking apple butter or strawberry. The grape jelly get past its expiration date, and you . . . will start reading young adult romance novels and wonder why it wasn't that way for you.

[Kujako]

I dunno, that one jar was a cheating harlot.

She spread for anyone with enough bread.

[Deleted]

I think that is the difference between just liking somebody and truly loving somebody. Somebody you are truly in love with even when they make you mad or your are frustrated with them etc. You still love them and care about them deeply and will be there for them.

Its like a mother. Even when kids are bad, mother still love children pretty much unconditionally. Obviously there are exceptions but real love I think transcends something fikel like than comparing it to grape jelly.

I know that and I agree with it. Though the possibilities of "stopping" true love or something to come in between it are more slim, although, true love is kinda subjective and can mean different things to other people.

Even if a person truly loves someone, you can't always expect or know if your partner does and will be able to keep up with you, so to speak.

So yeah, again, there's always a chance that something might change you or your partner but it's bad if you keep reminding yourself of that every time, not good for you or anyone else.

[mercutiouk]

Faith won't see logic because it holds fear at bay. It's a debate you cannot win, so you're being disrespectful for no reason.
__

Addressing your edit, It would seem you have a double standard. I don't doubt people think the same thing about you not being good materiel.



The way he described women, and how he obviously treats them is unacceptable.

Hmmm, regarding my edit...

There's girls that are fun to be around, spend some time with and if both parties are happy with it, sure, have some "personal time" with, no strings.
There's girls that are fun to be around that you have some connection with, feel sparks, fall for but know they won't really make the distance and aren't "the one" but are good company and good people, that's girlfriend material.
There's girls that require little explaining that rapidly fill and cover any spare/open bits of life and seem to "complete" you, that's wife material.

I don't think any of that is too unreasonable or harsh is it? I'm with the lady I'll marry next year, I've seen a fair amount of example 2 and a lot of example 1 , neither of which is particularly suprising (or I wouldn't think it so).

[Titan2k10]

It's a shame that there are all these people who don't believe in marriage. I think the real reason is that they are so shitty no one wants to be with them but they use meh its just a term as a cover.

[Spectral]

It's a shame that there are all these people who don't believe in marriage. I think the real reason is that they are so shitty no one wants to be with them but they use meh its just a term as a cover.

What about the people that have explicitly said that they're in happy, loving, long-lasting relationships that have said they're not interested in marriage?

[Wilian]

It's a shame that there are all these people who don't believe in marriage. I think the real reason is that they are so shitty no one wants to be with them but they use meh its just a term as a cover.

It's a shame that there are all these people who think marriage has any relevance in anything at all. I think the real reason is that they are in fact un-sure about their own feelings and thus they require external confirmation as a cover.

[Kujako]

It's a shame that there are all these people who don't believe in marriage. I think the real reason is that they are so shitty no one wants to be with them but they use meh its just a term as a cover.

Yes... cause the only way someone would want to be with you is if you get the Government and lawyers involved. How about the reverse? If you do believe in marriage its only because no one will stay with you unless they are legally obligated to.

Not saying that's the case, but its just as stupid as what you're claiming.

[Woeful]

It's a shame that there are all these people who don't believe in marriage. I think the real reason is that they are so shitty no one wants to be with them but they use meh its just a term as a cover.

Marriage isn't a belief, its a form of relationship with certain legal and cultural consequences. Been married for over 20 years. Sorry. Somebody wanted to be with me and me with her.

That said, marriage today isn't as attractive as it once was. I see it every day.

[Stede]

It's a shame that there are all these people who think marriage has any relevance in anything at all. I think the real reason is that they are in fact un-sure about their own feelings and thus they require external confirmation as a cover.

Marriage has relevance. The law says so. Get mad?

[Gamdwelf]

What about the people that have explicitly said that they're in happy, loving, long-lasting relationships that have said they're not interested in telling the other person in the relationship that they love them?

Fixed your statement for you. Marriage is a declaration of love, if you don't want to tell the other person you're going to love them forever that is fine.

[God8010]

At 20, I'd say there is no reason for it. At 30, I might still agree with my 20 year old self. At 40, people you know now will be dead or changed. Friends you've made and lost come and go while everyone you talk to will slowly be taken up by jobs and kids of their own. Marriage is a good thing for people who get lonely and know what a commitment is. At a certain point life begins to slow down for everyone.

The big spook everyone talks about is just people not getting married so young these days and with us living longer; it isn't a bad idea to think before you act.

[Wilian]

Marriage has relevance. The law says so. Get mad?

Maybe in backwater countries where religious institutions are still allowed to meddle in legal matters.