Corrupt-A-Wish Forum Game

[Blueobelisk]

Wtf is a 2/3 or 3/3.

[Deleted]

Granted,but everytime he looks at your health and life bar it depletes by 1% upon every look.

I wish women had 3/3 instead of 2/3 all the time,quiz me to find out what i mean if interested!

granted. Since you're not going to be specific I'm going to view 2/3 as your balls and 3/3 as your balls and your dick. hey, if you're not going to be anything accurate about it, I'll fill in the gaps, and it's usually not pretty.

so they got your balls and your dick, and they decide to sacrifice them to the great BlueNzall in the sky, who gain your virility, and your first dibs on any Rockstar games, and all your money, each. meanwhile, you spend many unproductive years taking it up the butt in your local penitentiary.

I wish that my issue with my telco is fixed soon. idiots claim I got 16.88 EUR outstanding, but they don't realize that's the money that was left over on my prepaid when I switched to subscription based, and which they deducted already from it. I even got the invoice to prove it.

[Akshak]

Granted but now you have a recurring monthly charge for access and services from One Direction's "Win a Date With The Band" contest. Explain that one to the rest of the men!

I wish my house would just fix itself rather than break down (in one year the dishwasher, washing machine and dryer have all gone out in addition to me having to now rip insulation out from underneath the house).

And in the words of Randy Quaid in ID4...."I'mmmmmm baaaaaaaacccck."

[Deleted]

Granted but now you have a recurring monthly charge for access and services from One Direction's "Win a Date With The Band" contest. Explain that one to the rest of the men!

I wish my house would just fix itself rather than break down (in one year the dishwasher, washing machine and dryer have all gone out in addition to me having to now rip insulation out from underneath the house).

And in the words of Randy Quaid in ID4...."I'mmmmmm baaaaaaaacccck."

granted. Your house fixed itself to be a huge mansion. However, because of this, you need to hire 10 people to clean it, pay a fortune in housing tax and are burglarized every 3 days because people think you got piles of cash. In addition, the house fixed itself to the state of global heritage site, which means that you cannot change anything about it even if you wanted to. and this means that every day hundreds of people come to watch your house, blocking you from getting out, so you lose your job.

I wish I was born in an era where humanity started exploring the galaxy, and I could be part of it as a captain or commander.

[Blueobelisk]

Granted, you're commander and the age you're in is the great galaxy exploration.

However, the reason for this exploration comes from the need to find more land, as Earth is overpopulated with tens of billions of people (like ~50 billion? (no I'm not gonna fucking over exaggerate and say trillions. This is a real fake corruption, damnit.)). So you're the commander of one of the four ships exploring the galaxy for land inhabitable by humans. But some crazy exciting stuff happens. Pick the ending you like best, I'm getting fucking tired:

1. One of the three other ship captains decides to reduce the earth's population by crashing his ship onto earth and wiping out ~15 billion people. You stop him and die.

2. There's one of the activists on your ship who also hates the huge population, and he murders you and commandeers the ship in an effort to kill the other captains (but not the ships) to force the United Republic to reduce the Earth's population by individually murdering the people with diseases, the elderly, people with low IQ, and criminals.

I'm too tired to think of more.

I wish I had a had some Nyquil.

[Wayne25uk]

Granted,but because i have no idea what it is i just sent you a tub of lard instead.

I also wish to be a space commander of my own star fleet.

(Ok here is the 2/3 + 3/3 explanation. Have you ever noticed women are never perfect they always have at least one fault,look at any woman in the world they will have two of these 3 things. 1= Ass 2= Looks/Face 3= Boobs. For example you meet a really fit woman and she is gorgeous and has a great ass but no boobs thats 2/3,or a woman with a great ass and massive boobs but she then turns round and is hideous. I have never ever met a woman with 3/3 and sometimes there is a secret 4th,they can have most of these things but turn out to be a real bitch!)

[Blueobelisk]

Didn't take long for you to get banned, king. HehehehehAHAHAHAHAHHA lol. God I'm such a divine profit.

Lol at your #/3 explanation, I sort of figured it had something to do with that...

Granted, you're a space commander of a star fleet, but you run into an alien civilization and are ordered to capture the planet. You are successful in landing and you lead a great raid and conquer their planet, but the aliens decide to blow their planet up like Frieza does in DBZ and you blow up. But you sent their provisions back to earth so they can advance. But you're dead.

I wish nzall got a haircut.

[icedwarrior]

Granted. The Illusion gives nzall a bowl cut.

I wish I had something interesting to say.

[Deleted]

Granted. The Illusion gives nzall a bowl cut.

I wish I had something interesting to say.

Granted. You have something so profoundly interesting to say that you have no way to express it using any modern human language, because none of the Human understandable words are adequate to express how interesting it is.

I wish my Ubisoft ticket is solved soon. Bought 4 AC4 resource time saver packs on sunday evening. still haven't arrived. are they unique per account or something? then why only give 500 of each resource when you need a bunch more?

Also, about the telco thingy. A few months ago, another client paid her bill, but she made an error when entering her customer number, which meant that she actually entered my number. So we received the bill, just paid what we were invoiced (which was substantially less) and meanwhile she started getting messages that she hadn't paid enough. She started to argue with the telco and eventually proved through a statement that she paid her invoice. They then deducted my account with the money but neglected to tell me. so in the end, I had 16.88 outstanding payment which they didn't tell me about... remind me again how this is legal?

[Akshak]

Granted but the customer support tech responsible for your ticket also added in a feature that transforms every character you ever create in any past, present or future Ubisoft games looks like a pink My Little Pony and randomly stops mid-firefight and exclaims, "Bitches I'm faaaaabbbuuuuulousss!"

I wish my Christmas present for the 2nd time in 5 years wasn't a colonoscopy.

[icedwarrior]

Granted. Your present for the fourth time in five years is a pap smear. The other year? A colonoscopy.

I wish the games that were mainstream (mainly Call of Duty) weren't mainstream, but instead, high-quality indie games (such as Hotline Miami, Thomas Was Alone, etc) were vastly more popular and influential.

[Akshak]

Granted but since they're indie games now they're harder to find, less apt to get published by even the smallest garage and force every person behind the games on the developer side to become unemployed - just in time for Christmas. Sleep on that Iced!

I wish Cindy Lou Who hadn't grown up to become the hot Taylor Momsen (The Pretty Reckless lead singer). I feel so dirty when I look at her now.

[icedwarrior]

Granted but since they're indie games now they're harder to find, less apt to get published by even the smallest garage and force every person behind the games on the developer side to become unemployed - just in time for Christmas. Sleep on that Iced!

were vastly more popular and influential.

But...if they're "vastly more popular and influential", how are they harder to find, more difficult to get published and go unemployed?

I wish Cindy Lou Who hadn't grown up to become the hot Taylor Momsen (The Pretty Reckless lead singer). I feel so dirty when I look at her now.

Granted. In this alternate reality, she grew up to replace Rebecca Black, and went on to sing Friday and Saturday. She no longer looks like she does now; she's visually the same as Rebecca Black is now, same voice, everything.

I wish Google Fiber was available where I live, it was affordable and I could use it whenever I so choose.

[Akshak]

Granted but Google had a bad morning the day the installed it and instead of the actual underground fiber optic lines and internet speed you got a new and untested product of theirs called Google Fiber Cereal. Bon appetite and happy crapping!

I wish BearGod would come back to me, I'm so lonely!

[icedwarrior]

Granted. BearGod appears in front of you. He has just awoken from his hibernation, and is extremely hungry. Because he's a bear, he is unable to remember who you are, and why he shouldn't eat you. So he does.

I wish Akshak would have an avatar on these forums.

[Akshak]

Granted but the avatar is so damned sexy it blinds everyone including the admins which sends them into a blind rage - banning the first person who wished for me to have a new avatar.

I wish when BearGod passed my remains out the other end that they ended up as a sentient mass on Iced's doorstep blowing a massive Vuvuzela at all hours of the night.

(ps but it would be nice to have an avatar of some sorts)

[Blueobelisk]

Granted, but your Iced's new roommate and you have to clean everything up.

Btw, there's no such thing as Beargod. There is only me, Iced, nzall, and 25% of the the Wayne. You can think of us as real gods in this thread.

I wish Ashak was a peasant who worshiped us every Sunday.

[Akshak]

In the words of Kyle, "OMG you killed BearGod!"

Granted but as a peasant I no longer feel the need to shower or even wipe and I show up to worship you with every body odor imaginable and transfer every one of those to you and your fellow "gods". And not even gods can cleanse themselves of my aura and filth.

I wish Wayne25uk wouldn't get banned as much but rather get turned into members of annoying boy bands every time he commits an infraction.

[Deleted]

Granted, but everytime he gets an infaction they will sing a song about it, they will sign that song everywhere you go, when you go there, you will eventually get tired of a 100 man boy band and there will be nowhere to run.

I wish for hoards and hoards of gold, mountains taller than trees, chests overflowing with precious gems

[Akshak]

Granted but said hoards of gold and gems are so heavy you get crushed to death underneath them and thus your precious, clean hoards are now stained blood red.

I wish I could watch the crushing happen as I need the entertainment.