it's inevitable and called biology
it's inevitable and called biology
If it were up to the guys, possibly/probably
But a note to all the male BFFs - it's her choice and you're already friendzoned, and real life isn't a Kate Hudson rom-com, so probably not
I grew up with the impression that guys that float around like unflushable pieces of shit are scumbags. It's a very common tactic, probably because it works often enough.
I feel like I've always had too much self esteem to do something so scummy just to get a female's attention. Either they're attracted to me, or they aren't - and trying to go beyond that is pathetic.
But I do see it happen plenty. I've talked to a lot of women who felt like the best way to pick a mate is from a "friend" they've known a long time. (aka, unflushable waiting in the wings) The way I see it, "friends" of this nature ensure you'll never have a real lasting relationship.
There is no such thing as pure friendship between opposite gender people who are attracted to each other and are not involved with other people.
A relationship is basically a friendship where the partners bang each other. If you're in a relationship where you don't relate to your partner, you don't have common grounds and generally your partner isn't someone you would hang out with as a friend if it was the same gender as you, then your relationship is not going to have a long life. Great sex never helped a relationship stick together, your partner must first be your friend, and 2nd your bum buddy.
Plenty of examples when people became lovers a few days after meeting each other; some people just really click with each other, I guess. Not saying it is very common, but it does happen.
Usually, indeed, it takes a lot of time. In my uni class two classmates are engaged and planning marriage; they became only romantically interested in each other by the end of the first year.
At some point, horny attractive guys figure out that they can get what they want by hitting on women IN VOLUME. The girl doesn't even have to be that attractive either.
Case in point would be Arnold Schwarzenegger. He married a Kennedy but still banged the average-looking maid. My point is not that they will cheat, is just that they figure out to hit on all the women regardless of how pretty they are. I know several guys like that as well. The ones that get a lot of hot girls are usually not above sleeping with ugly girls either.
Despite what some people would have you believe, not all guys are horndogs just waiting to stick it in to every single girl he meets or is friends with.
No it's not inevitable. No matter the guy's wishes, it is ultimately up to the woman to decide if anything happens, the best you can do is make your intentions known and then hope for the best. If she says no then you can still be friends, assuming you are both adults about it. If there is tension after the fact, the guy needs to move on and not hover like a creep.
Or, you know, most normal guys don't have the urge to fuck every single woman they socialize with. I have female firends to hang out with, although I can only tolerate small doses at a time (so much talking).
The reason why men/women relations are nearly always romanced in stories is the same as why there's always a fight at some point. Majority of entertainment audience want sensations, rather than reflexions. A survival challenge rather than a story about prosperity. etc. Not a bad thing, and I find myself falling into the "popcorn trap" quite often, but it's a thousand years cultural thing. Hard to change.
Look at Blade Runner vs Star Wars. The average people will tell you Blade Runner was boring, and that Star Wars was awesome. The level of mind activity while watching Star Wars is as high as watching a Kardashian.
Last edited by Kourvith; 2016-05-05 at 01:37 PM.
RIP Genn Greymane, Permabanned on 8.22.18
Your name will carry on through generations, and will never be forgotten.
I think many people make a distinction before love and infatuation. They will claim that you can be infatuated, i.e. have strong feelings, to someone you might even have met just a few hours ago - but you can't love a person without knowing them very well... Which makes some sense, but I am not sure if such distinction is necessary. There are, indeed, cases of people falling in love with someone right off the bat and staying that way till their death.
Cliche. I've known girls since I was six and we haven't banged. Good friends. Even had one in my wedding party to stand up for me.
The world is a wonderful shiny panorama of pussy. Literally half the people I tend to meet are women, somehow, so it's really possible to find sexual partners w/o making it weird by banging someone you've known for too long and are on a "just friends" basis. Sometimes both sides are willing, in which case it's ok (but then, why would they be "just friends" for years, instead of "friends with benefits"?). Sometimes neither is willing, and it's not really because they're ugly, they just... don't. Surprisingly enough it's ok to *not* want to fuck someone, nobody's going to come to your house and revoke your man card, contrary to what some internet self-proclaimed alpha males seem to think. And if one side is willing and the other is not, well, this tends to end badly one way or another. Pity sex or "oops, too much wine!" sex or "my boyfriend dropped me so I might as well fuck you out of frustration" sex are all bad ideas and a surefire way to cause drama. Wise men dodge drama.
Last edited by mmoc4588e6de4f; 2016-05-05 at 03:03 PM.