30 year old wizard/virgin

[Nurvus]

Gymming doesn't guarantee success, or necessarily boost success at all.

But the self-confidence that grows from taking that step does.

[Northy]

My main, and most of my alts are Elves.

If I could play a Blood Elf Druid, I would.

i would never play a druid because i like transmog too much.

As a 30-year-old straight man I feel uncomfortable playing anything but Orc or Tauren.

[Dug]

I am ... Trigge... I shouldnt be here for my own sanity.

Don't worry Fishtoes I still believe you're gonna find someone!

[Shadowferal]

If this world ever produced another Nikola Tesla, multiple industries would kill him fast.

[Deleted]

Never said it did, but it definitely helps improve the full package.

Who do you think has a better chance at getting a girls attention? A fit, athletic guy with great social skills or a fat neckbeard with great social skills?

Plus, working out does way more than make you look better. It makes you feel better. One of the things women are most attracted to is confidence. Being in shape and proud of how you look is one of the best ways to increase confidence. Not to mention it teaches you the value of hard work and achieving goals on your own.

I didn't even include the health benefits because, unless you're some crazy HAES believer, you should already know being in shape is way more healthy than not being in shape.

Let's not pretend staying in shape doesn't help boost your success with life in general, not just with women. Thinking otherwise is just delusional.

As far as I'm aware, OP has never claimed he's fat, nor a neckbeard. So let's start with that.

As far as getting a girl's attention... that has nothing to do with success. I can grab a girl's attention by throwing water at her. What matters is what you do after you've grabbed someone's attention. Body language, how you articulate yourself, those are much more important than having a six-pack. That's showing confidence.

Being fat might hurt your self-confidence. It's not healthy being fat, that is entirely correct. But what makes one feel good about themselves is highly individual. No, gymming doesn't automatically make you feel better/more confident. Hell, you can get good looks by simply dressing well.

Sure, staying in shape boosts success in life. But when it comes to getting laid, looks are highly overrated.

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But the self-confidence that grows from taking that step does.

Again, highly dependent on what matters to a person.

[Deleted]

That would mean I only have 7 more years to go, but on the other hand I think 30 is way too early to become a wizard, just look at all the wizards you see in movies, they're always really old, and there's even some posters here saying they already hit the age of 30 and didn't get any powers so I think you have to wait a lot longer, like until you're 80, which is a really long time, but I hope it's worth it.

[Deleted]

But the self-confidence that grows from taking that step does.

This. I always found if I were healthy to be a high self-condifence boosts, even more than having a GF or having sex.

[Nurvus]

Again, highly dependent on what matters to a person.

Again, it's not about the body. It's about the attitude in trying to improve yourself. Regardless of outcome. It will help you.
Just taking the step makes a tremendous difference and other people WILL notice that difference.
It's not about being upbeat or downbeat.
It's about being invested and focused on something, or slacking.

[Deleted]

"Improve yourself" applies more to practical things though. If you're overweight you can improve yourself if you lose weight. That's a practical improvement.

I generally don't agree with the phrase though. Improving yourself implies there's something wrong with you and you need to achieve something better. That's a very damaging carrot on a stick way of thinking. Like this you can "improve" yourself constantly, it will never end. If you get a great body you will want an even better body, if you get a girlfriend, you'd want a hotter girlfriend.

Why not live with the assumption, that there's nothing actually wrong with you and instead of "improving", just do what makes you happy, widen your horizons? One of the hardest things to do is to not give in to the societal pressure. Once you stop giving a damn what people expect from you, you can just be. If you can't you're just gonna live to impress(or fail to) others and what a shitty way of living that is...

[Melchior]

I don't know what this wizard stuff is about.

But hey, I'm 30, had a couple of short "online relationships" but nothing in person. I know it's my fault, and I know what my faults are. I've had periods where I've tried to put myself out there, but I always came to the realization that it's not fair for anyone else to have to deal with me and my issues until I'm a better person. Having been alone my whole life does sap my motivation to become better though, so there's a good chance I'll always be alone. I wish there was something to make me happy while alone, but I have yet to find it.

[Celista]

I think for most people it does the opposite. Sex can be a great bonding and creative experience.

I would agree.

Humans need touch/affection, it's not optional for a healthy existence. If anyone is interested they should look up documentaries/studies of infants that grew up in orphanages, whose shelter/food needs were met but their need for love/bonding does not...it is absolutely essential for healthy human development.

It does not have to be from sex but I would imagine most individuals who are not in a relationship/dating are not getting their needs for human touch/intimacy met.

[Deleted]

I would agree.

Humans need touch/affection, it's not optional for a healthy existence. If anyone is interested they should look up documentaries/studies of infants that grew up in orphanages, whose shelter/food needs were met but their need for love/bonding does not...it is absolutely essential for healthy human development.

It does not have to be from sex but I would imagine most individuals who are not in a relationship/dating are not getting their needs for human touch/intimacy met.

Yes, there's also plenty of asexuals who enjoy touch (cuddles etc) but not sex per sé

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How te fuck do you have a gf for a year without sex, sure you're not gay?

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Yeah but for a year!?

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They were all mentally ill too

Low blow adam, you should know better you heternormative gaylord ^^

[Gandrake]

Thoughts?

nigga find a bitch that'll let you nut in her pussy

you dont wanna be about none of that wingardium leviosa shit

[Deleted]

lol "powers similar to the Buddha". buddha preaced about self control and he whas fat as hell .....

[Krause]

[Deleted]

Again, it's not about the body. It's about the attitude in trying to improve yourself. Regardless of outcome. It will help you.
Just taking the step makes a tremendous difference and other people WILL notice that difference.
It's not about being upbeat or downbeat.
It's about being invested and focused on something, or slacking.

I fully agree. But improving yourself is not exclusive to gymming.

Why not live with the assumption, that there's nothing actually wrong with you and instead of "improving", just do what makes you happy, widen your horizons? One of the hardest things to do is to not give in to the societal pressure. Once you stop giving a damn what people expect from you, you can just be. If you can't you're just gonna live to impress(or fail to) others and what a shitty way of living that is...

Oh yes, absolutely. But if you want a successful career, or a good relationship, then yes, you are imperfect and can always improve yourself. "Living to impress" is such a hostile way to put it. When you formulate it like that, of course improving yourself is gonna be a hassle. I try to improve myself in order to make other people happy. If I can make someone smile or laugh, that's awesome!

Let's put it another way; You wanna increase your DPS? You're going to need to improve yourself. You can always become a better DPS, or better tank, or better healer. You're still good enough. But striving to become better at what you're doing is always good. Again, you're still good enough no matter what.

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I don't know what this wizard stuff is about.

But hey, I'm 30, had a couple of short "online relationships" but nothing in person. I know it's my fault, and I know what my faults are. I've had periods where I've tried to put myself out there, but I always came to the realization that it's not fair for anyone else to have to deal with me and my issues until I'm a better person. Having been alone my whole life does sap my motivation to become better though, so there's a good chance I'll always be alone. I wish there was something to make me happy while alone, but I have yet to find it.

You're never gonna become a better person socially if you stay at home until you become better. You can study all you want, but when it comes to all things in life, experience is always the best way of learning. When I first became social after years alone by the computer, it was a true hassle, and boy, some people hated me (and some still do!). But by just being brave, and trying to learn from others, and being persistent on joining social activities no matter how scary or awkward it was, I've now awesome friends, and lots of fun.

You do whatever you want. You can sit around and cry about your life or you can go out and do something about it. Do the right thing. Good luck!

[BuckSparkles]

How te fuck do you have a gf for a year without sex, sure you're not gay?

Already explained it in an earlier post. She didn't want to, so I never bothered her about it.

[Nurvus]

But improving yourself is not exclusive to gymming.

Ofcourse it isn't. And you don't have to go to a gym to exercise, although using a Gym creates a commitment that helps you maintain a routine.
But your apperance (or your perspective upon your own appearance) is important.
So if there's something you can improve about your appearance, you have two choices:
1 - Let it be - and this leads to a whole bunch of nasty coping mechanisms, including denial.
2 - Work on it.

Social aspect is another issue you can work on, but it's somewhat closely connected to the image you have of yourself, and this goes back to working on your appearance, because if you're not comfortable with yourself, you'll be holding yourself back on many things.

And I'll stop here because this isn't some psychology major xD

[kingj56]

Genius is quit often married to mental illness. And those guys didnt go insane untill the later parts of life. Issac Newton literally played with mecury like so many did back in his day. They didnt know it was toxic but thats beside the point. Let this man use his unwillingness to have sex turn into his greatness if he so chooses. Encourage him!

[Deleted]

Already explained it in an earlier post. She didn't want to, so I never bothered her about it.

What a wasted year