[Movies] Last Movie You Saw and What You Would Rate it Out of 10

[callipygoustp]

Blood Father (2016)

5/10
The dialog was painful to listen to at times.
Felt like the story was quickly thrown together.

[Knslyr]

Captain America: Civil War - 8/10
High quality superhero movie as per usual from Marvel. Not much to say about it besides good action, and was a fun twist to see the good guys fight each other. Also introduced Spider-Man now so bonus points for that!

[apepi]

The Little Prince - 9.5 /10

Was really good, I would suggest to anyone to watch it, though I would read the book before. It is on netflix.

[Val the Moofia Boss]

Kingsglaive: Final Fantasy XV - 2.5/10

Most of the rating coming from being overall technically amazing, animation quality is very uneven though, story was meh. I kind of liked the first 30 minutes, then TOTALLY got put off when it became a sponsored content shitfest, I'm not watching a Final Fantasy movie to see characters driving an Audi in front of a Uniqlo and Beats shop, with ads for Japan Airlines.

And I'm not even joking, they REALLY did put all that in the movie, even all at once in a single scene.

A Final Fantasy set in a modern-esque world is a bad thing?

[Val the Moofia Boss]

Not sure where you got the idea I said that? Unless showing real-world ads in a fantasy world makes it more "modern" to you? Even "real world" movies doing that shit lose points in my book, Audi already being one of the worst offender there (along with smartphone manufacturers), with all those slow-motion nonsense camera angles clearly made just to show a fucking logo and not to make the movie better. I'm not paying to watch advertisements, seeing one has an instant "out of the movie" effect on me.

Fun thing is 3 out of those 4 brands were already on my "don't ever buy shit from them" list.

Less than one sentence of your review was about the non-sponsored aspects of the film, which suggests you gave it a low rating mainly because of the IRL elements.

[Deleted]

Saving Private Ryan. 9/10
Recently picked this up with the DTS soundtrack, and OMG. The beach head scene really is the best audio I have heard in a long time. Bullets pinging and ricochetting all around you in 7.1 surround is absolutely stunning. Had a engineer fixing my heating system in during it and he stated that he had never heard a movie sound so fantastic. I am hoping that they release a DTS:X or ATMOS audio mix for it sometime in the future

Movie wise, this is an all time classic, Pretty sure everyone has seen it by now considering it is an 18 year old film, so there is no real need to give a mini-review. However, what I will say is that if you get the chance and have the equipment, or know someone with a DTS capable receiver, then you absolutely MUST watch this at a high volume.

[Val the Moofia Boss]

Snow White and the Huntsman - 5/10 (Okay)

Other than our two male protagonists (of whom Chris Hemsworth carried this film), the detailed costume and set design, the few cool practical effects (such as the hallucination sequence), and the gorgeous beach charge (even if using catapults as an anti-calvary weapon was ridiculous), this was... an unremarkable film. Very little character development, plotholes everywhere (where did the white horse come from? Who sent the birds to rescue Snow White? What prophecy were the dwarves talking about? Who was the !NOT-Princess-Mononoke forest spirit doing in this film? Why did Charlize Thereon not kill Snow White upon taking over? What were William and his countrymen doing in between the time they fled and the time Snow White came back and magically lead them to victory?

Camerawork had a few interesting shots (such as the evil archer falling down from the battlements and the camera moving through it), but overall it wasn't great. The shot-reverse-shot sequence between Snow White and her mother in the beginning was not engaging at all, and so was the erratic shaky cam. The dialogue was unremarkable as well, and the movie tried to be too many things at once. We start with a Peter Jackson LotR prologue that sets up the film as an epic, then it escape film, then it becomes a Princess-Mononoke exploring the enchanted forest film, then it attempts a high-drama scene with Snow White dying that we are not invested in (did I mention I started sleeping when the dwarf died?), and then it becomes a Narnia movie climax. It was trying to be too many things at once which and did not transition well between those parts in the timespan. Furthermore, it feels like the story is so removed from the original Snow White story, they mind as well have just gone all out and created their own story. At least removing the dwarves would've given them more time to devote to developing William, the Huntsman, Snow White, and the villain.

Would watch once, as this is a cool film the first time but has no rewatch value IMO.

[callipygoustp]

ARQ (2016) (Netflix Original)

7/10
Solid, though unoriginal, story.
Solid acting.

[Deleted]

The Little Prince - 9 /10

Cutest story ever.

[Gallahadd]

10 Cloverfield Lane, 6/10

A semi decent thriller about a survival nut in a bunker with a random guy and girl... Then suddenly Aliens.

Although tbh if you didn't see that coming, you weren't paying attention.

[callipygoustp]

Spring (2014)

8/10
Solid story.
Solid acting.

[Fencers]

Snowden 6/10

Eh. Not as provocative as it tried to be. Doesn't really add anything to Snowden's story. I felt the Citizen Four documentary was more illuminating than this movie. It's kinda boring really.

Sully 6/10

Well directed and acted for the most part. However, it's kind of a routine movie. Nothing remarkable just well done.

Magnificent Seven 7/10

Probably the worst of the three films (7 Samurai & M7), but enjoyable nonetheless. The actors are really engaging and personable. Pratt, D'onofrio, Washington and Hawke really sell their characters despite an underwritten script (esp. compared to Kurasawa's). Stylishly directed but that too is somehow less visceral than Sturges and not as 'earth-y' as Kurasawa's version.

Again, probably the worst of the three. Still a lot of fun to watch.

[Val the Moofia Boss]

Magnificent Seven 7/10 (Good)

A good action flick, I enjoyed it very much. You know a film is good when you have to go to bathroom after drinking your soda but stay anyways for a whole hour to the end of the movie. Characters were under-developed, and the opening exposition was unclear at times, but darn this is a solid film. The action is also clearly understandable as opposed to certain other action films of late were you can't tell what's going on at all. Has low rewatch value but absolutely worth a watch.

[Gallahadd]

Goemon - 9/10

A beautiful, insane masterpiece. It's more likely that you're familiar with Casshern, the other film from Goemon's Writer/Director, if so you know more or less what to expect from Goemon.

However, Goemon differs in one subtle, but important way from Casshern. While both films are shot in the same mindbending style, with over the gallons of CGI, dreamlike visuals and fastpaced action, Goemon has the one thing that Casshern lacks. An understandable, relatable storyline.

Set in fuedal Japan, at the end of the 1500s, Goemon tells the story of Goemon Ishikawa; a fabled thief and good guy very similar to the western Robin Hood... but with a larger appetite for the ladies.

One day, while robbing a noble, Goemon steals a seemingly empty wooden box... But with one simple act, he will be thrust into the centre of world changing events, which will drag up moments of his past he would wish left buried.

[Shadowferal]

Magnificent Seven 6.5/10
Well, I knew going in it was going to compare well to the older western. And it was off-putting to see it prettied up a bit. (No one said a single racist thing..it was like it didn't exist. :? )
But I got to see Denzel as an old west gunfighter, which is what I wanted.

Overall it was light entertainment.

[icedwarrior]

The Room (2003): 1/10 as a serious, actual movie critique; 9/10 for entertainment's sake.

The short version, so as to not spoil this 'masterpiece'? Expect a movie that is so terrible, you'll laugh. To read any further may reduce your enjoyment of this movie.

I...I'm at a loss as to how I should describe this movie. To say it's a disaster is an understatement; the budget was an estimated $6 million, and it grossed a grand total of $1,800 via the box office before it was pulled from circulation. That alone should say enough about the movie, but I'll try to elaborate further.

The characters are, quite simply, utterly ridiculous. Take Mark, for example. He can't shut up about how Johnny is his best friend, yet puts up little resistance when Johnny's fiancée attempts to seduce him. Then, immediately after having sex with Lisa, he exclaims how he can't believe that she coaxed him to do so. You have free will, right? Isn't that the worst thing you can do to your supposed best friend? Lisa, man... Lisa is insufferable. She constantly remarks about how much she doesn't like her fiancé, saying that 'she does what she wants to do'. She's written to be so evil for the sake of being evil it's comical. Denny exists for two reasons: one, to show how much Johnny is a great man (Johnny pays for both his tuition and his apartment), and to creep on Lisa (asking to watch them have sex near the beginning of the movie, asking to kiss Lisa, etc). Johnny, of course, is the star of the show, and words cannot describe how much I enjoyed Wiseau's character. It's obvious Wiseau wrote Johnny to be an extension of himself, to gloat about how much everyone loves him and how rich and successful he is. For some strange reason, he has all of his dialogue dubbed in after filming (which is especially confusing because he can speak English, and he grew up in the US), and emphasizes words in the weirdest ways ('I've had enough of this whorld!'). Johnny is a delight, and is easily the best part of the movie - although I'm almost certain he's not great for the reasons Wiseau intended him to be.

Which brings me to the plot. This is a movie about nothing. Nothing... ever really happens in this movie. It could very well be summarized in two sentences and you will have missed nothing. How Wiseau purportedly wrote a 540 page script about it is just baffling. The plot ultimately makes little sense, and the constant use of sex scenes for little effect is comical. In fact, there are three sex scenes in the first twenty or so minutes. Despite the movie being a 'serious' 'drama', Wiseau apparently wanted to implement a subplot in which Johnny would be revealed to be a vampire. Like, what? What little plot that does makes sense is written so terribly I audibly groaned - no, Johnny, I can't say that one of your friends falling in love with your fiancée is okay because 'If a lot of people love each other, the world would be a better place to live'. Really?

In addition, the dialogue is completely ridiculous and unbelievable. At one point in the movie, Lisa's mother casually slips into conversation that she 'Definitely has breast cancer'. This, apparently, isn't interesting enough to comment on, and they resume their conversation (nor is this ever brought up again in the film. Huh. You'd think that might affect the plot...I guess not). This brilliant exchange is also uttered, much to my amazement:

Mark: How was work today?
Johnny: Oh, pretty good. We got a new client and the bank will make a lot of money.
Mark: What client?
Johnny: I cannot tell you; it's confidential.
Mark: Aw, come on. Why not?
Johnny: No, I can't. Anyway, how is your sex life?

The delivery makes it more hilarious, if that's even possible. There are many more unbelievable lines, but to list them all would be a disservice to this movie.

Ultimately, I liken The Room to Sharknado; they're objectively terrible movies, but they're both so bad and ridiculous I can't help but be fascinated by them. If you want to watch a terrible movie, check out The Room. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to start listening to The Disaster Artist, an 11.5 hour long audiobook following Greg Sestero's account of the filming of the movie.

waits for @Blueobelisk's review

[icedwarrior]

Sharknado will never get to the level of The Room.

Oh, I'm aware that it's not on the same level, I was just trying to think of something somewhat comparable. I think I should have written that The Room is somewhat like Sharknado, yet turned up to eleven. Otherwise, I can't think of a movie that really compares to it. Can you think of a more apt comparison?

[Deleted]

Legend of Tarzan 2/10.
Normally I would write a paragraph or two about the movie, but I wont, this can be summed up in six words.
It's Crap, Wish I never Bothered.

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince (Film 6 in the series) 7/10
Picked this up for £1.99 on blu-ray in a thrift store. Still as enjoyable as ever. Little dark at times and a lot longer than I remember, but still a solid entry in the movie "Potterverse" Now I just need to keep my eyes open for the rest on Blu-ray.

[MrPaladinGuy]

Legend of Tarzan 2/10.
Normally I would write a paragraph or two about the movie, but I wont, this can be summed up in six words.
It's Crap, Wish I never Bothered.

I more or less agree, and I'm rarely this negative when it comes to movies.

[Deleted]

Ghostbuster (2016) 4/10
Some laughs, but mainly when the cameo's made an appearance. The comedy seemed forced, Chris Hemsworth was cringe worthy in this, and I generally like his acting. The rest of the cast where completely and totally forgettable. rather than remembering their names, it came down to Fat one, Skinny one, One with glasses and Black one. Storyline was a rehash of the original with minor changes and really, really badly told. Its only saving grace was the eye candy towards the end, and "The Mask" reference at the end, that was fucking garbage that could easily have been left out as it brought nothing to the story.

I had great hopes when they announced this originally that it was going to be as good as the original, then I saw the cast and I had fears it was going to be bad, but it is worse than the second one (if that's even possible). Its a fucking abomination of a film that should have been a direct to video release or never released, I really don't know who was in charge of casting, but they made all the wrong decisions playing towards the PC crowd. I only hope that they use this atrocity of movie making as an example of how not to create a feature in film school.