"No means no!" but only for women

[Deleted]

Well as I said, I disagree entirely. The woman has the choice to have a procedure done that is hers and hers alone to make. Regardless if the child is going to be born it needs to be cared for and that should be up to both parents so that the child has the best chance to succeed in life.

Im not saying that it isn't her choice, im saying it is her choice. But if you want to have the child to have 2 parents then you will have to do what is best for the child and give it up for adoption.

[bergmann620]

We only wail in the night when while we're recovering from all the action we're getting. But we'll stop by the friend zone and let you pansies hear about it.

Yea, I'm sure. Nothing says, "Hey guys, I'm getting all this action" like bragging about it on MMO-Champ. And yea, that 'friend-zone' thing? Invented by dudes that need a reason for not getting laid. Oh- just so you know, I'm married.

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Well as I said, I disagree entirely. The woman has the choice to have a procedure done that is hers and hers alone to make. Regardless if the child is going to be born it needs to be cared for and that should be up to both parents so that the child has the best chance to succeed in life.

You're talking to someone that thinks an abortion is functionally equivalent to taking a vitamin.

[Kraenen]

I don't mean to spam, but it doesn't seem like anyone has answered my question from earlier. How can you educate into someone the kind of impulse control and inhibitions we're talking about being necessary for increasing use of condoms and safer sex? I mean listen to that phrase "safe sex" - the people having casual sex are the same types who want something more risky anyways so we've lost them already. It's pretty common for condoms to even be looked down upon both for their pleasure-reduction and the notion that it's "chaining the animal" in a sense.

I'm sure there's some example of this, maybe meditation exercises and mindfulness helps slow down the passions. But when it comes to passion, sex is the epitome of the uncontrollable lust that clouds our judgement.

[bergmann620]

Im not saying that it isn't her choice, im saying it is her choice. But if you want to have the child to have 2 parents then you will have to do what is best for the child and give it up for adoption.

Once again, giving a child up for adoption is often a worse choice.

https://www.mentalhelp.net/articles/...en-and-adults/

It's one that you are trying to enforce by allowing fathers to put a financial gun to the child's head in order to force the mother to either abort or adopt out. It's just one of the reasons that you're in the vast minority that see this as a flawed system- you're not really looking at the best interests of a child- you're trying to minimize your liability after leaving your semen inside a female.

[Dug]

You're talking to someone that thinks an abortion is functionally equivalent to taking a vitamin.

Yeah shocking stuff I've read here. I imagine people are thinking of Plan B and the like instead of the actual procedure.

[Deleted]

Your two comments put together made me laugh my ass off. Keep being obtuse, I'm done feeding you today. Get back under that fucking bridge!

And your comments make me facepalm..

[bergmann620]

How can you educate into someone the kind of impulse control and inhibitions we're talking about being necessary for increasing use of condoms and safer sex?

You start by having legit sex education. You back it up by not shaming peoples' bodies and desires, so that they are more open in regard to their needs. (I know a lot of parents that are adamant that THEIR daughter will not be 'some slut on birth control at 16!") Lastly, we recognize that we can only ever do so much, and that 'oopses' will happen, both from contraceptive failure and responsibility failure, and that when they do, we as parents and society need to provide support to the people affected so that the children that result can grow up, be educated, and make good or better decisions for their lives.

Right now, we rely on shame and condemnation for the most part, and we're reaping generations of fatherless children and cyclical poverty as a result.

[Deleted]

As someone that's studied adoption quite a bit (my wife and I are dealing with infertility, and it is a family-building option), there are all sorts of complications that have nothing to do with the quality of the adoptive parents.

The most basic and common one is, "Why didn't my real mom/dad want me?" That can cause tons mental anguish, and can prevent or delay development or impair a person's ability to form attachments down the road. (And that's assuming the adoptive parents are up front with their child in regard to the adoption.)

Then, there are any number of medical issues that arise with not necessarily having contact with both biological parents.

Further, if you're looking at adoptions from third-world countries, those are most often cross-racial, and that brings in a whole other set of problems, especially in the U.S., what with our relatively segregated communities.

I'm not saying adoption is wrong, or that it's not the best possible option in specific cases- just that if the adoption is taking place solely because the father will not contribute, then it's almost certainly bad for the child.

Check this out if you'd like more background on some of these challenges:

https://www.mentalhelp.net/articles/...en-and-adults/

And there are just as many psychological problems with children raised by single parents, its just what you favour. I get it, you want to maybe adopt one, but that doesn't mean that being raised by adoptive parents is somehow worse then being raised by a single parent who cant afford to take care of you.

[Dug]

They also don't think it's possible to have sex with people without the risk of getting someone pregnant... Basically they live in a fantasy world and have no concept of reality.

Lack of experience will do that, yeah. I don't want to call out people but there were some posters quite a few pages back where its was painfully obvious how much they don't know about sex.

[Deleted]

They also don't think it's possible to have sex with people without the risk of getting someone pregnant... Basically they live in a fantasy world and have no concept of reality.

And most people here are just not bothered to read or are just plain obtuse.

[bergmann620]

They also don't think it's possible to have sex with people without the risk of getting someone pregnant... Basically they live in a fantasy world and have no concept of reality.

Unless you're talking about "The Loophole" (lol), it is impossible to completely eliminate the risk. Of course, you can reduce it to a lower percentage than we having of dieing by a hundred random mishaps, but yea.

Like, if she's on the pill, you properly use a condom, and go with a spermicidal lube, you have a better chance of being killed by a shark at your bus stop than creating a pregnancy...

[Kraenen]

You start by having legit sex education. You back it up by not shaming peoples' bodies and desires, so that they are more open in regard to their needs. (I know a lot of parents that are adamant that THEIR daughter will not be 'some slut on birth control at 16!") Lastly, we recognize that we can only ever do so much, and that 'oopses' will happen, both from contraceptive failure and responsibility failure, and that when they do, we as parents and society need to provide support to the people affected so that the children that result can grow up, be educated, and make good or better decisions for their lives.

Right now, we rely on shame and condemnation for the most part, and we're reaping generations of fatherless children and cyclical poverty as a result.

But what is the sex education that builds in a set of inhibitions into people's natural physiological responses?

[Dispraise]

you have a better chance of being killed by a shark at your bus stop

That's not a fair comparison. Landsharks are vicious.

But what is the sex education that builds in a set of inhibitions into people's natural physiological responses?

Legitimate question. People are stupid, particularly when it comes to sex. A far more deserving topic of discussion.

[Kraenen]

Unless you're talking about "The Loophole" (lol), it is impossible to completely eliminate the risk. Of course, you can reduce it to a lower percentage than we having of dieing by a hundred random mishaps, but yea.

Like, if she's on the pill, you properly use a condom, and go with a spermicidal lube, you have a better chance of being killed by a shark at your bus stop than creating a pregnancy...

See that's all great for reasonable people like you and me on an internet forum, but how does this appeal to someone who wants to be cool, have casual sex with random people, and doesn't give a shit about the consequences?

[bergmann620]

And there are just as many psychological problems with children raised by single parents, its just what you favour. I get it, you want to maybe adopt one, but that doesn't mean that being raised by adoptive parents is somehow worse then being raised by a single parent who cant afford to take care of you.

1) The reason the single parent wouldn't be able to afford to raise a child is because the father is a deadbeat that is busy chanting "Muh Rights!"

2) Adoptive parents don't sign 'non-divorce' guarantees.

3) Being a single mom isn't necessarily a permanent condition. I know an 'alpha' like you would never touch a woman that's been soiled by another man's seed, but, luckily, few are like you.

[Dug]

See that's all great for reasonable people like you and I on an internet forum, but how does this appeal to someone who wants to be cool, have casual sex with random people, and doesn't give a shit about the consequences?

Personally I think you overestimate the amount of people that "don't give a shit". The amount of casual sex happening at any one time in the US or any western country is mind blowing and not that many unwanted pregnancies are occurring. Generally people will put up with a little lack of sensation if it means no children.

...and some people are just really stupid and shortsighted.

[Kraenen]

...and some people are just really stupid and shortsighted.

Which would make up the population of those having teen pregnancies, and are the people my statements would apply to.

[bergmann620]

But what is the sex education that builds in a set of inhibitions into people's natural physiological responses?

I'd go with Chappelle's theory- ugliest two teachers covered in mayo having sex in front of all the students.

[Deleted]

1) The reason the single parent wouldn't be able to afford to raise a child is because the father is a deadbeat that is busy chanting "Muh Rights!"

Right, a male should not have any choice, and is a deadbeat for not wanting to become a parent. Think your child wish is not making you see things clearly atm.

2) Adoptive parents don't sign 'non-divorce' guarantees.

But is still better then the alternative, being a single parent from the start.

3) Being a single mom isn't necessarily a permanent condition. I know an 'alpha' like you would never touch a woman that's been soiled by another man's seed, but, luckily, few are like you

Then she should wait with having children until she found someone who wants to have children with her, just like males have to.

[bergmann620]

But what is the sex education that builds in a set of inhibitions into people's natural physiological responses?

Right now, the single biggest thing would be "How to get on the pill".

It sucks to put it on women like that, but it's the most sure-fire.