France bans child beating

[Wyrt]

Spanking works.
There are millions and millions of children who grew up knowing no consequences...It has led to the most self centered, egocentric, depressed generation....ever. All this boils down to consequence. These people grew up in places where they got away with being wrong, where they were 100% safe all the time and nobody ever put them in their place.
Bunches of parents trying to be their kids friend. Raising assholes with nothing to contribute to society.

If the only way you can get your point across is to hit someone until they agree then your point wasn't worth getting across in the first place.

[Jokerfiend]

Spanking works.
There are millions and millions of children who grew up knowing no consequences...It has led to the most self centered, egocentric, depressed generation....ever. All this boils down to consequence. These people grew up in places where they got away with being wrong, where they were 100% safe all the time and nobody ever put them in their place.
Bunches of parents trying to be their kids friend. Raising assholes with nothing to contribute to society.

You are the only one that thinks young adults grew up without consequences. You need a reality check.

[Fudal]

The idea behind corporal punishment is simple; it works in the same method as establishing appropriate sentences for crimes. The plan is to utilize it in a manner to deter further transgressions. Human beings like animals learn in simple ways, repetition is on way. This is why people practice things in the same manner over the course of years to improve their abilities. This method is effective, but, it isn't very quick.

Another way that humans learn is through pain. When you need a child to learn to not repeat an action because it is dangerous the most effective way to teach them is pain. This does not mean beat them or abuse them. A small child reaches for a pot on the stove, you tell them No. They continue in attempts to grab the pot; you are now faced with 2 options: 1) you smack their hand, this hurts them for a minute they associate the pot with pain, they avoid reaching for the pot again. Or (2) You can let them grab the pot it pours boiling liquid on the child; if the child survives they associate the pot with pain they avoid the pot. Both choices are equally effective

[Deleted]

I'm of the opinion some adults need a good smack up the back of the head aka Gibbs or Red, if that says anything. *shrug*

But surely, if you did research, you should have a line of reasoning to why you'd choose physical stimuli?

Like i stated, there are a lot of situations where we'd figure physical stimuli, but there are few, that would socially be incorporated to any real degree of relevance.

(For instance, you don't see psychologists slapping people - It's mostly regressive in terms of building trust, in terms of associating something to a negative stimuli, and further more is allocated in an area related to pain.)

so, the simple question; Why'd you figure slapping them would help?

[Crissi]

Offending me, no. Nothing offends me sweetheart. Disturbs me on the otherhand... there are a lot of thing that disturb me.

It's borderline Climate Change denial level of ignorance.

I mean I get what you're saying. Honestly, people advocating spanking for every little infraction kinda scare me, as well as it somehow being a cure all for bratty behavior when its not. There are so many other ways to cure brattiness. I'd say 98% of the time Dad only had to raise his voice and glare and Id behave cause "I love dad and I dont want him mad at me!" Daddy's girl syndrome.

I mean you likely wont have to worry about me. I'm likely entirely to soft to actually spank kids anyways.

[Wyrt]

The idea behind corporal punishment is simple; it works in the same method as establishing appropriate sentences for crimes. The plan is to utilize it in a manner to deter further transgressions. Human beings like animals learn in simple ways, repetition is on way. This is why people practice things in the same manner over the course of years to improve their abilities. This method is effective, but, it isn't very quick.

Another way that humans learn is through pain. When you need a child to learn to not repeat an action because it is dangerous the most effective way to teach them is pain. This does not mean beat them or abuse them. A small child reaches for a pot on the stove, you tell them No. They continue in attempts to grab the pot; you are now faced with 2 options: 1) you smack their hand, this hurts them for a minute they associate the pot with pain, they avoid reaching for the pot again. Or (2) You can let them grab the pot it pours boiling liquid on the child; if the child survives they associate the pot with pain they avoid the pot. Both choices are equally effective

lol if you think the US criminal justice system works then you're wildly mistaken.

Frequently hitting your kid does teach them things. Like how to hide their mistakes, how to lie better, and not to ask for help when they mess up.

[Crissi]

But surely, if you did research, you should have a line of reasoning to why you'd choose physical stimuli?

Like i stated, there are a lot of situations where we'd figure physical stimuli, but there are few, that would socially be incorporated to any real degree of relevance.

(For instance, you don't see psychologists slapping people - It's mostly regressive in terms of building trust, in terms of associating something to a negative stimuli, and further more is allocated in an area related to pain.)

so, the simple question; Why'd you figure slapping them would help?

Immediate feedback vs repeated "wtf you dumbass, stop doing that because ____". I suppose letting them fail hard would work too.

I blame the 3 stooges.

[Masark]

There are millions and millions of children who grew up knowing no consequences...It has led to the most self centered, egocentric, depressed generation....ever.

You appear to be confused. In the first half, you seem to be thinking of your irrational conception of millennials (Hint: Physical abuse is not the only kind of consequences), then in the second half, you go on to describe the Boomers.

[Zeta333]

?????

By most metrics millennials are shaping up to be the next "greatest generation" and vastly better than their elders particularly the self-centered boomers, so I don't know where you get your daft ideas from.

have you had a gander at the news in the past 2 years? Im ashamed im part of this generation.

[Gilgemesh]

If the only way you can get your point across is to hit someone until they agree then your point wasn't worth getting across in the first place.

Spanking isn't hitting someone till they agree with you. What kind of barbarian would beat someone else till they agree?
Spanking is offering a sharp reminder that the consequences to our actions are real. Because rationalizing with a child doesn't always work.

I swear...some of you try to rationalize your ideas by jumping to the absolute worst conclusion possible and trying to defend your point from there. To assume that a parent spanking their child when the other route fails becomes...beating them till they agree.

[Deleted]

Immediate feedback vs repeated "wtf you dumbass, stop doing that because ____". I suppose letting them fail hard would work too.

I blame the 3 stooges.

But what exactly does a slap promote?

They get the message of that they did bad ; But they won't understand why, how they are supposed to do better and it does not convey love nor intimacy.

It logically produces: Pain related to a stimuli, and the thought of "Bad".

Allowing your kids to explore things is valuable, but it doesn't mean you should be abscent either, that's just even worse. Because, then they won't even be under the impresion that you'd care enough to be there to see them do stuff.

i've seen such behaviour in kids that suffer from neglect ; Even grownups. They develop tendancies of self-imposed destructive behaviours - Due to basically lacking the guidance in some basic aspect of parenting.

Like @Jokerfiend stated, you have to be present and give them guidance, a child does not know - it needs emotional support and guidance, because it lacks the rational part as well.

I mean, even just thinking of it from a logical perspective, say you'd teach a friend - If they do something stupid, do you conclude that you have to slap them? That it would teach them?

[Celista]

We're not allowed to smack around adults in order to get them to listen. Why should we be allowed to smack around children?

[Logwyn]

At 4 years old you shouldn't take your eyes off the goddamn kid.

I'm talking about kids that understand what's going on. Smacking a 4 year old would be no different from beating up a dog, neither will understand why you're attacking them.

So...... you are home alone. You are watching a 4 year old. You always take the child into the bathroom with you so that they can never have eyes taken off the child... You need a shower... guess you are giving the child a shower too.. Child lays down for a nap.. You sit in the same room the entire nap time?

What do you do at night? Someone says up for 8 hours while the other sleeps to watch the child sleep?

Are you also suggesting that a 4 year old is as smart as a dog? They save average dog intelligence is about a 2 year olds. I think a 4 year old could know why they were being punished. You insulting 4 years old everywhere!!!!


I'm also curious what would you do with a 5 year old that continues hit on an electric heater with a stick. Told not too twice. Does it again. Whats the next step?

[Deleted]

Spanking isn't hitting someone till they agree with you. What kind of barbarian would beat someone else till they agree?
Spanking is offering a sharp reminder that the consequences to our actions are real. Because rationalizing with a child doesn't always work.

I swear...some of you try to rationalize your ideas by jumping to the absolute worst conclusion possible and trying to defend your point from there. To assume that a parent spanking their child when the other route fails becomes...beating them till they agree.

That's a high level abstract concept that can be conveyed in a better way than to physically cause them pain.

[Gilgemesh]

You appear to be confused. In the first half, you seem to be thinking of your irrational conception of millennials (Hint: Physical abuse is not the only kind of consequences), then in the second half, you go on to describe the Boomers.

I'm describing the generation that's in college and just entering the workplace right now.

[Crissi]

But what exactly does a slap promote?

They get the message of that they did bad ; But they won't understand why, how they are supposed to do better and it does not convey love nor intimacy.

It logically produces: Pain related to a stimuli, and the thought of "Bad".

Allowing your kids to explore things is valuable, but it doesn't mean you should be abscent either, that's just even worse. Because, then they won't even be under the impresion that you'd care enough to be there to see them do stuff.

i've seen such behaviour in kids that suffer from neglect ; Even grownups. They develop tendancies of self-imposed destructive behaviours - Due to basically lacking the guidance in some basic aspect of parenting.

Like @Jokerfiend stated, you have to be present and give them guidance, a child does not know - it needs emotional support and guidance, because it lacks the rational part as well.

I mean, even just thinking of it from a logical perspective, say you'd teach a friend - If they do something stupid, do you conclude that you have to slap them? That it would teach them?

eh, if you're doing just the spanking and nothing else, you're doing it wrong imo. It needs to be accompanied by explaining why what you did was bad. Which seems counter productive when just explaining and being disappointed combined with other disciplines gets the same results in minor and medium infractions.

which is why I'm really only ok for super super bad infractions. Like putting yourself or others into immediate danger.

- - - Updated - - -

We're not allowed to smack around adults in order to get them to listen. Why should we be allowed to smack around children?

Pfft, I sometimes smack my SOs so they listen But that's always been a condition of my relationships: mutual soft smacking is a ok. Also, stop means stop.

also, sometimes dumbasses need a quick Gibbs slap across the back of the head.

[Malacrass]

Teaching children that violence is a solution for daily life issues is a terrible idea, and usually leads to the child using violence later in school or even adult life. It is easy to see when you look at children with a middle eastern background, where it's perfectly normal to spank your kids for the most minor shit.

[Jakisuaki]

The hilarious part is that people like you can't differentiate between "child beating" and smacking a child on the ass for misbehaving.

The even more hilarious bit is that almost every great person you can name throughout history had, at the very least, been spanked as a child. Abraham Lincoln? You better fucking believe it. Nelson Mandela? Without a doubt. Buddha? Darn tootin'. Gandhi? Hate to break it to you, but... Martin Luther King, Jr.? Yeah, a black kid from the South, he definitely didn't get smacked by his mama... XD etc.

You know what's even more telling? Ask any adult who was spanked (again, as opposed to beaten like dogs) as a child if it was a good thing or not, and the overwhelming response is and will be "Yes." It's only new-age pussies who claim otherwise, and they tend to be people who proudly say they'd have burned their family to death as a child. So.... yeah.

You're acting like every child that didn't get smacked around is an entitled pussy with no respect. That's simply not true. When I was referring to "Child beating", I meant stuff like smacking as well

You're basically saying that them getting beaten as a child is the reason for all their great accomplishments. That's absurd.

[Fudal]

lol if you think the US criminal justice system works then you're wildly mistaken.

Frequently hitting your kid does teach them things. Like how to hide their mistakes, how to lie better, and not to ask for help when they mess up.

Ok, there are multiple problems with your statements: 1) You are the one suggesting repeatedly hitting your children; that isn't the point that i made. (2) The reason the criminal justice system isn't working has much more to do with punishments not being handed out fairly, not being harsh enough for most crimes and not being conducted in a public manner to deter others from committing the same offense.

If you doubt my conclusion on the criminal justice system go ask any teenager in singapore what happens if you are convicted of vandalizing public property. Public canings are a very effective, efficient, and low cost punishment.

[Templar 331]

Frequently hitting your kid

I see this misconception thrown around this site every time corporal punishment is brought up. There is a difference between a spank for the sake of discipline and "frequently hitting."

Like how to hide their mistakes, how to lie better, and not to ask for help when they mess up.

This is not the result of spanking, this is the result of a parent with a sever dominating mentality that has crossed the threshold of discipline and into abuse. Having been on the receiving end of it I know. The spanking is not what causes these bad character traits to occur, it's the parent's mannerisms. How they handle the situation that would need to be rectified with a spanking. Exploding on a child in a fit of rage/yelling and demeaning them is more harmful than a few slaps on the butt.