Page 12 of 12 FirstFirst ...
2
10
11
12
  1. #221
    Quote Originally Posted by jackofwind View Post
    It's how our brains work, we can't help it as humans. No one can, everyone has confirmation bias. We even get it when dealing with verbal communication. I edited my previous post with more info.

    It's a testament to the human mind's ability to convince itself of what it wants to believe. This is all scientifically documented stuff, it's not really a debatable point.
    I'm talking about legit manipulation, though. And I don't see why you find it so unlikely to happen, I see it everywhere.

  2. #222
    Some of the responses in this thread are amazing in a bad way.

    It's hard to explain but the ones who said: "It happens when they just don't like you enough to sleep with you", aren't far off. It all comes down to bad signals. You gave them the wrong impression about something, or they just aren't really down for whatever it is you want from them. Relationship, casual sex, whatever it is. It's entirely possible that they just flat out aren't interested in that kind of deal with you but most men send wrongful signals without even realizing it.

    It's a heavily supported fact that men are very, very often painfully oblivious to the signals they give off that can raise immediate and clear red flags for the woman, and she will immediately respond by "friend-zoning" you. She's cut you off because something you did triggered it in many cases. A lot of the time, common sense >should< have been enough for you to realize what you did wrong but sadly, that just isn't true in the overwhelming number of cases. In other cases, you said or did something that an ex of theirs did, for instance, immediately triggering that response but you had no way of knowing that. An innocent "joke" can be all it takes some times to set very lasting impressions in a woman's (or anyone's) minds.

  3. #223
    Herald of the Titans Maruka's Avatar
    10+ Year Old Account
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Alberta
    Posts
    2,554
    Its a real thing but its your own choice to stay there.

  4. #224
    Quote Originally Posted by Helden View Post
    The Friendzone stops existing the moment you stop viewing women as different from men.
    Firstly, that's probably one of the biggest pieces of bull I've heard in awhile cause men and women are different... we think differently and perform differently under given circumstances.

    Secondly, this issue is present regardless of the physical sex or mental gender of the individuals involved.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by downnola View Post
    The friend zone is a place that men create because they were rejected sexually. Women are hyper selective with their mates; deal with it and fix your shit.
    The friend zone was named by men. It is when the initiator, who's seeking something more than friendship, fails to be seen as a romantic/sexual partner and is viewed as a friend or some other platonic relation.

    It doesn't need to be based on sex/gender like how people assume only men get friendzoned. This isn't the case, they just get friendzoned more cause we all know it generally goes "Boy meets Girl" if the two sexes are involved (not because it's grammatically correct).

  5. #225
    People love sex. No, it's not a thing unless you somehow, for some dumb reason insist on wanting and waiting for people that don't have any desire for you in return. So yeah, move the fuck on and get pussy that wants to give it up. Plenty of fish in that ocean.

    How's is this even a question?

  6. #226
    Moderator Aucald's Avatar
    10+ Year Old Account
    Epic Premium
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Philadelphia, PA-US
    Posts
    45,576
    The "friend zone" is a place, but it's not a place that a person can be trapped in unless they are unwilling to leave it. The concept of "friendzoning" as a charge laid at the feet of another person is the real issue here I would assume - and while a man or woman can indeed hedge their bets and keep presumptive partners on the hook while they angle for another relationship, the other party in that equation is still complicit in their own "friendzoning" so to speak. If you feel like the person you desire is purposefully holding you at bay (e.g. keeping up the pretense of friendship and not making their feelings known) while they try to secure another relationship then you should walk away from your attempts to woo them. You should also probably end the friendship as well as someone that willing to manipulate you likely doesn't have your best interests at heart.

    On the other side of the issue, if you aren't being forthright in your goals in any form of relationship (e.g. you desire more out of a given friendship) then you should be honest and up-front about that. Tell your would-be partner what your actual goals are and let them have a hand in making an informed choice. It's bad form to complain about being unrecognized or overlooked if you're not being honest with other people about your intent.
    "We're more of the love, blood, and rhetoric school. Well, we can do you blood and love without the rhetoric, and we can do you blood and rhetoric without the love, and we can do you all three concurrent or consecutive. But we can't give you love and rhetoric without the blood. Blood is compulsory. They're all blood, you see." ― Tom Stoppard, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead

  7. #227
    Why do these threads always turn out to be awful?

    The "friendzone" is just an inexperienced guy being, well, inexperienced and shy. If you want to be someone, ask them out and if it works-great, if it doesn't move on.
    Remember kiddies, hope was the last evil in Pandora's box.

  8. #228
    Deleted
    Quote Originally Posted by WintersLegion View Post
    If they see you as more than just a friend but all your interested in is friendship with them then yes.
    The conclusion is that "friend-zone" must be renamed in "horny friend-zone"!

  9. #229
    Deleted
    Sure it is. Ever wanted to fuck a female friend, but she wanted the friendship more than your D? That's the friend zone. It only exists in your brain. In her brain, it's "Why does he have to ruin a good friendship by wanting more..."

  10. #230
    Quote Originally Posted by Winter Blossom View Post
    Sure it's a thing. "I don't want to sleep with you because -insert reason(s)- but I want you as a friend" = you're friend-zoned.
    I think the definition of the "friend zone" is idea put forth that because you have become friends, your friend will no longer see you as date-worthy. By that definition, I don't believe the "friend zone" is a thing. What you're describing here is merely that men and women can be friends.

  11. #231
    The Unstoppable Force THE Bigzoman's Avatar
    10+ Year Old Account
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Magnolia
    Posts
    20,767
    Quote Originally Posted by Breccia View Post
    Good.

    The "friend zone" is a thing. It is not a negative thing unless you allow it to be, and that reflects on you more than her. I am friends with many women, including a fair share of women I was at one point romantically interested in but who did not agree. It's not a downside. Hell I just got back from lunch with one of them literally an hour ago.

    Do these people not have in-laws? Single work colleagues? Neighbors?

    Seriously, think about what the friend zone implies. The implication is, that a woman who doesn't want to have sex with you, is a big enough offense that you don't want to be her friend. How fucking entitled do you have to be to believe that?

    And maybe, this is kind of a side effect so might not apply here, but maybe the friend zone only applies to women you think aren't too ugly to bang. In which case, copy and paste everything above and throw in "shallow" for good measure.
    How people decide to spend their time and who they choose to be friends with are their choice and theirs alone. This extends to the conditions One can set for a friendship. If you try to tell people how to spend their time, who to be friends with, and What is or isn't a good condition for said friendship, they aren't the entitled ones. You are.
    Last edited by THE Bigzoman; 2017-04-26 at 11:10 PM.

  12. #232
    Dreadlord Metallourlante's Avatar
    10+ Year Old Account
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Mega-City One
    Posts
    932
    It's indeed a thing but only for guys imho aka "you're too ugly for me better if we stay just friends"

  13. #233
    Merely a Setback Adam Jensen's Avatar
    10+ Year Old Account
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Sarif Industries, Detroit
    Posts
    29,063
    Yeah it is.

    I saw it happen.

    And the dude who was "victim" of it, became a real creep. Almost stalker level creep to the girl he liked.

    Worst part is, the girl is too nice to tell him to go away and befriends him.
    Putin khuliyo

  14. #234
    The Undying Breccia's Avatar
    10+ Year Old Account
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    NY, USA
    Posts
    39,907
    Quote Originally Posted by THE Bigzoman View Post
    How people decide to spend their time and who they choose to be friends with are their choice and theirs alone. This extends to the conditions One can set for a friendship. If you try to tell people how to spend their time, who to be friends with, and What is or isn't a good condition for said friendship, they aren't the entitled ones. You are.
    Yeah...no.

    First of all, what you're suggesting would make me judgemental, not entitled. The terms are not synonymous.

    Secondly, you offer little to no defense for someone who views friendship with a woman as a burden that must be paid for with sex.

    Thirdly, while I might have no right telling people how to live their lives, I do have the right to say doing something makes you an immature entitled sexist cro-magnon dickweed. Which is pretty much what I did. I didn't technically say not to do it. I pointed out how it made them look bad, and how it made them entitled, and I stand behind both of those statements completely and unashamedly.

    And fourthly, you're suggesting that setting the requirement for sex, as payment for friendship, is a condition I'm not allowed to object to. I think you and I have dramatically different views of friendship, and I hope you're not as lonely as my judgemental mind assumes your attitude implies you are.

  15. #235
    If you have romantic feelings toward a woman and she claims to only want you as a friend cut ties ASAP, if she was lying or playing some sort of mind games the ball is in her court

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Gstheone View Post
    If you have romantic feelings toward a woman and she claims to only want you as a friend cut ties ASAP, if she was lying or playing some sort of mind games the ball is in her court
    That being said, I don't personally seek friendship from a woman, mostly because my interests and hobbies are mostly different therefore without those common factors, it seems pointless. I couldn't give a shit who got 1st on American idol just like the common female wouldn't give a shit about parsing in the 99th percentile on a boss fight

  16. #236
    I think it is a internet myth. I don't get it.

  17. #237
    Quote Originally Posted by Bred345 View Post
    I know several couples who started their relationships with a friend zone, now they are married, so it can work
    in the future... leave 2 year old threads dead. Somethings are better left to eternal slumber.


    TLDR:

    Yes the friend zone is real. It is NOT gender specific but the people who complain about it most have some issues they need to sort out or are pursuing someone well out of their league. And I'm counting chasing someone who clearly isn't into you as an issue that needs to be sorted out.

    Most issues about 'friendzone' sort themselves out when someone cracks down and fixes their shit or moves on.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •