Originally Posted by
Keilith
A response from the people of America.
Dear Queenie,
Get over yourself!
The only thing you can "assume" here is, we the US of A, can STILL kick your ass, only now we can do it on your turf.... what's left of it anyway.
I was mildly amused by your new rules, especially how you want us to start spelling and pronouncing words like we're simultaneously examining our own prostrate.
And I guess I can understand how all those fireworks we shoot off on our Independence Day wrecks havoc of that Post Traumatic Stress Disorder you picked up way back in the 1770's. Maybe you NEED a pshrink.
As for our guns, we actually have a few dolts of our own that want to take them away too. We call them "Liberals" and since you actually have a political Party for them over there, we'll ship them to you. All of them. Gladly. Oh and by the way, send us what ever guns you confiscate over there. We'll put 'em to good use here.
Since you folks live on an island smaller than half our states, I'm sure the concept of an Interstate Highway system has never occurred to you. And why should it? After all you've been driving around in circles (you call them "roundabouts") on the wrong side of the road all these years. Let us, and the virtually the rest of the globe, clue you confused folks in a secret here. They call it the RIGHT side of the road for for a reason!
The English should never lecture ANYONE about food. EVER!
Most of your new rules have been mildly homorous.. That is until you decreed that we would start having to drink that hot camel piss you dolts call beer. If you think we were pissed off over tea, just try screwing with our suds and you'll REALLY make us mad! And you DONT want to make us mad...just ask the Japs.
It appears you don't like listening to our actors attempting to sound like they are simultaneously giving themselves an anal examination in movies huh? GOOD. Make your own damn movies for a change. But try doing so OUTSIDE of that same glorified barn you keep shooting those Bond movies in would ya!
Dont like our football either I see. Well, why don't you try doing something about your soccer hooligans first and then come tell us about violence. As for baseball, we kinda like that game. It takes a great deal of skill to hit a 90mph fast ball or a wicked curve which is something you folks couldnt handle 'cause you're still rolling the damned ball up like you're serving it up to a two year old. And whats with that name "Cricket" anyway?
Lee Harvey Oswald killed JFK. But I can understand your suspicious nature about these things. After all, the entire world knows the KBG had its own Resident Station inside your MI-5.
I'm pretty sure what ever back taxes you think we owe you pales in monetary comparison to the amount you still owe US in that lend lease deal that saved your ungrateful asses back in 1939 & '40.
Daily tea huh? How quaint. We call it Happy Hour as we slam down a few COLD ones down at Joes Bar & Grill in big fat mugs. And we'll leave that limp wristed crumpets and strwberries served cup-n-saucers to you panty-wastes while we was down our Cheeseburgers and Freedom Fries.