View Poll Results: Would you commit infidelity?

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  • Yes, but I wouldn't tell my significant other.

    83 18.95%
  • Yes, but I would tell my significant other afterwards.

    19 4.34%
  • No, I would never do that.

    336 76.71%

Thread: Fidelity.

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  1. #201
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ravenfel View Post
    You are correct, and I won't be like the people picking on you and say that I dont think about cheating. The truth is EVERYONE thinks about sex with another person, and to deny that would be rediculous. It is only the act of cheating that people abhor, and are giving you crap about. Would I cheat? Of course not, and I would prefer my partner not cheat either. Do I watch porn and do my thing like everyone other dude on here? Absolutely, and who is really gonna deny they don't vicariously put themselves in that fantasy as innocent as that is.
    Fair points here.

  2. #202
    Quote Originally Posted by Magisleeper View Post
    Been there done that.

    I cheat, I likely always will; When it comes to relationships on the majority its truth that what they dont know wont hurt them. To the best of my knowledge I have never been cheated on, and while I am sure it has happened I dont know about it, and I dont care.

    In my opinion unless you flaunt it in your significant other's face, it doesnt matter overall. The more you cheat the worse, and not just the action because it is more likely you will get caught/seen. Everyone wants to cheat, anyone who says otherwise is a liar, its genetic, more so for males but please dont strart a M -vs -F on me. I think if you respect the one you 'love' you make it descreet and brief so they never have to worry.

    From my own experiance being with the same person for a long time is infuriating and a little afair gives me perspective and clarity, and afterwards I dont want to stray for a long time. I honestly believe if they dont know it doesnt hurt(Unless you get a std).
    Unless I'm wrong, everyone reading this post has misunderstood Magisleeper's view.

    There's a difference between cheating, and having multiple partners. Cheating requires an active engagement with your significant other in which you both agree to be monogamous, but one of the parties engages in sexual acts outside of this agreement. Taking word for word from this quote, he's saying he's slept with other women while his girlfriend was expecting a monogamous relationship.

    In other posts Magisleeper has said he is open about having multiple partners outside his relationship, and his significant other is as well. This is not cheating, if it's previously agreed upon as being alright.

    So really, I think everyone attacking him is confused about his meaning. I had to read through the thread to get his point, which I agree with. Sex with other partners is fine if you and your significant other agree to it beforehand.

    Cheating, as defined by one engaging in sexual activities with another partner who is not their significant other without their significant other agreeing to it beforehand however, is not fine. I'm perfectly happy in a monogamous relationship, and cannot forsee myself cheating on my soon-to-be-wife. Not for some religious ideology (I'm an atheist), but simply because that's how I choose to love, and we agree on this point. If one of us did not, then the relationship wouldn't exist today.

    I've been cheated on, while I was struggling to hold on to a crumbling relationship. 8 months later I found out she was pregnant, and 3 months later she had the baby (this puts her at 11 months after our relationship ended.) For two months I was on edge, worrying that I had a baby on the way with a woman I wanted nothing to do with anymore. Luckily, after the 9th and 10th months came and went, I knew I was in the clear.

    I'm a firm believer in to each their own, so long as you do not harm someone else, physically or emotionally, in the process.

  3. #203
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    Quote Originally Posted by Last Starfighter View Post
    What if my SO is pretty hot, but the slam piece I'm about to get down with is better looking that my SO?
    Sex and looks are only a minor part of a relationship.

  4. #204
    At those saying everyone cheats or everyone wants to...

    Just because you have irresistible urges to break your partner's trust doesn't mean we all do. I think the absolute hardest part though is finding the right person though. Someone you'd never want to cheat on who is completely devoted to you and fulfills your every desire.

  5. #205
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aleros View Post
    At those saying everyone cheats or everyone wants to...

    Just because you have irresistible urges to break your partner's trust doesn't mean we all do..
    You all do. Now please continue to prove that "everybody lies". It's so funny.

  6. #206
    Quote Originally Posted by vizzle View Post
    Fidelity.

    If you had/have a long-time, serious significant other, and you were presented with a situation where you could have sex/fool around with another beautiful person without your significant other ever knowing about it, would you do it? Even once?
    I'm married, and absolutely not. I wouldn't have got married if I felt I could possibly do that to my wife. Anyone who is married and thinks they could do that to their spouse probably shouldn't be married, and should have lead a single kind of life.

  7. #207
    Hard to say, but I think I could resist temptation. Not in a relationship right now, but I consider myself a trustworthy person and I expect the same of my partners. I would be even put off if a girl dumped their boyfriend to get with me (if thats the best legitimate reason at least).... if I consider that important, I don't think I could ever cheat and live with the guilt.

  8. #208
    Quote Originally Posted by vizzle View Post
    Fidelity.

    If you had/have a long-time, serious significant other, and you were presented with a situation where you could have sex/fool around with another beautiful person without your significant other ever knowing about it, would you do it? Even once? And if yes, would you tell your significant other after?

    Remember, your answers here are anonymous!

    Personally... I feel bad about it, but I think I would, if just once. I know I'm not as good of a person by doing it, but I don't think I would be able to handle myself if that situation ever appeared in my face.


    Edit: Yes yes, I know I made a mistake in the question. It should be infidelity.
    If you fool around with someone else, usually it's a sign there is something wrong with your relationship. It really doesn't have much to do with how attractive the person is. So, to answer your question, No... I have never fooled around with someone else, If something doesn't work out, I would rather end it rather than someone being deeply hurt.

  9. #209
    Quote Originally Posted by ag666 View Post
    You all do. Now please continue to prove that "everybody lies". It's so funny.
    If you honestly believe over 7,000,000,000 people share the same urge to break another persons trust such as yours, then I'm sorry, but something in your brain just isn't connected properly.
    Last edited by crylo; 2011-11-28 at 06:44 AM.

  10. #210
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    Quote Originally Posted by crylo View Post
    If you honestly believe over 7,000,000,000 people share the same urge to break another persons trust such as yours, then I'm sorry, but something in your brain just isn't connected properly.
    Are they homo sapiens? Then yes. YOU included. Now you can continue to lie.

  11. #211
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    Quote Originally Posted by crylo View Post
    If you honestly believe over 7,000,000,000 people share the same urge to break another persons trust such as yours, then I'm sorry, but something in your brain just isn't connected properly.
    Why do so many of you continue to equate monogomy with trust, they are not the same thing. Two people can trust and love each other while at the same time having sexual fantasies and experiances with a person other than thier commited partner.

    If this is understood beforehand it is in no way a violation of trust as it was not implied to begin with, furthermore where does this continual assumption come in to play that the moment two people begin dating they are 'exclusive'?

    Now the point I, and a couple others have been hammering at here is that everyone wants to be with someone other than their lover, spouse, bf, gf, or otherwise significant other at some point for some reason if only in a fanstastical sense. If you have ever looked at another person and imagined, if only in your mind for a moment, what it would be like to have sex with them, you wanted to cheat. Just because you did not act on the desire does not mean the desire did not exist! I cannot stress this enough, just because we have a desire to do something does not mean we will automatically act on that desire, those are base instincts, and being able to overcome our instincts is one of the key differences between us and wild animals.

    Ok, I cant recall if I said I wasnt going to post again before or not but go ahead flame me with more of your 'I would never cheat and your a monster for suggesting I would' nonsense again.
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  12. #212
    I couldn't. Not that I never appreciate other men's looks, or if they're hot, but I've just never found sex so important as to ruin a relationship of a lifetime for a fling. I value my relationship with my fiancee far above what I could ever experience in bed with a stranger. And I know that goes both ways with us.

    I do not understand these "other women" either. I couldn't imagine sleeping with a man I knew to be married or in a relationship. I can't imagine I would feel all that proud of myself. (This goes to "other men" too, but I think it's bit more common the other way around?)

    I don't really understand the whole concept either. If you have promised your spouse fidelity, sleeping with another person is a direct violation to their trust. If you cannot keep your hands off other people when you're in a relationship, you shouldn't be in a relationship. If you want a relationship with the person you're with, you don't cheat. That simple.

    Now, open relationships are a different matter altogether, but I think that would be really hard to handle without any jealousy. I've met a person who had an open relationship with his girlfriend. He was very popular with women and I really do not wonder why. I never met his girlfriend though, so I cannot know what she really thought about it.

  13. #213
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    Would I fuck someone else? Definitely, if they were hotter and I was attracted to them.

    But I'd confess afterwards.
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  14. #214
    Quote Originally Posted by Magisleeper View Post
    Why do so many of you continue to equate monogomy with trust, they are not the same thing. Two people can trust and love each other while at the same time having sexual fantasies and experiances with a person other than thier commited partner.
    As I've said before, if you want an open relationship and speak about it with your significant other first then okay. If not, and your partner is expecting you not to, then do not cheat. It's as simple as that. Stop being a weak fuck and hurting your partner.

    I personally will never have any sexual experiences with anybody other than my significant other, and guess what, I'm happy with that. She satisfies my needs, and I don't need anybody else. Have I ever thought about it being with anybody but her? Yes, when I was 14 and young, but I actually dislike the idea of being with anybody else but her. That was about it.

    We've been together for almost 7 years now, and unlike ag666's belief, I'm only really interested in her. Do I find other girls attractive? Of course, but I don't have the urge to cheat, regardless what some kid thinks on the internet. (:

    Quote Originally Posted by ag666 View Post
    Are they homo sapiens? Then yes. YOU included. Now you can continue to lie.
    Arrogant, and ignorant. That's some bad qualities. I guess you'll realize someday not everybody's like you. (:

  15. #215
    Quote Originally Posted by Ravenfel View Post
    You are correct, and I won't be like the people picking on you and say that I dont think about cheating. The truth is EVERYONE thinks about sex with another person, and to deny that would be rediculous.
    I haven't been remotely attracted to a single human being I've seen on this planet since I started dating who is now my wife. Models, actresses, Victoria's Secret Angels, Playboy Bunnies, hot sorority chicks on campus, only one person does it for me anymore.
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  16. #216
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    Quote Originally Posted by crylo View Post
    Arrogant, and ignorant. That's some bad qualities. I guess you'll realize someday not everybody's like you. (:
    it seems to me you are in your early 20's, so in fact it is you who will someday realize how naive you are today. When you actually meet "that girl" who will make you wanna cheat - remember me - it may help you to not cheat.

  17. #217
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    I have an open relationship with my boyfriend, so we can fool around with others as much as we want to. As long as we don't tell eachother about it.
    And it doesn't happen so often. If you love your partner you kinda want to stay with only him/her but sure, sometimes it's nice to be with someone else for a night just as long it's only sex and nothing else.

  18. #218
    Honestly, I see myself being the one that's cheated on, because I just don't care enough to prevent things like this from happening, and because I don't shower people with love and affection, even if they're my significant other. I would not be surprised if the blame for their cheating was placed on me, because it was likely my fault, because I didn't 'love' them enough.

    To answer whether or not I would personally: Would I? No. Would I feel guilty about it? No. Would I tell my significant other? No.
    If I can't be the sex symbol, then I can definitely be the BITCH

  19. #219
    Relationships vary from person to person and situation to situation. Some people have monogamous relationships full of love and trust that last their entire lives, other people suffer in a situation not of their choosing or based on following social conventions that run contrary to their natures. Fidelity, as I see it, is a contract with one's partner on the terms of a relationship amicable to both parties... rules are set, boundaries observed, and conventions agreed upon to the benefit of everyone involved. If you are looking for a 1-on-1, completely monogamous relationship with another person then by all means seek it out... just remember to ensure your partner agrees and can live with your terms. The same is a true of an open relationship... if you respect your partner, you ensure that they understand the nature of the relationship from the outset.

    Fidelity means a lot of things... but the essence is in not betraying your partner's expectations and trust in you. For some people, this extends to sex with other people... for others, it is a more emotionally-centered quality and doesn't extend to the act of sex. If you find a partner (or partners) that agree with you on the terms, you'll have a difficult time of being unfaithful unless you set out explicitly to break their trust in you.
    Last edited by Aucald; 2011-11-28 at 03:34 PM.
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  20. #220
    Quote Originally Posted by ag666 View Post
    it seems to me you are in your early 20's, so in fact it is you who will someday realize how naive you are today. When you actually meet "that girl" who will make you wanna cheat - remember me - it may help you to not cheat.
    I'll never meet that girl, so I won't remember you. Just another face in the crowd who believes he knows everything based on people he has met before, yet doesn't know how far off that is.

    It's the same as the people who told me her and I wouldn't last past High School, and Middle School, and so on.

    Peace ~ Believe what you want, it doesn't matter since we're never going to talk again, but if we ever do: you'll see that girl never came along.
    Last edited by crylo; 2011-11-28 at 07:47 PM.

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