How old is to old? (Dating)

[rederoin]

I'm sorry, but as a 28 year old, when I look at a 15 year old, my immediate reaction is that I think she looks like a child. No, I wouldn't call them fully developed. Maybe they have boobs, but they don't look like adults in any way.

---------- Post added 2012-05-11 at 09:47 PM ----------



Man, if you don't see the difference between the way a 25 year old girl processes emotions and the way a 15 year old girl processes emotions, I just don't know what to say. There is a HUGE emotional, maturity, and experiential differential between those ages, let alone the physical differences.

Maybe for a 28yo, a 14-15yo is really too young, but its fine for something below 20, i'd say.

[Saft]

I'm 26 atm and would probably date at most a 34 year old and least a 20 year old.

[crica]

age is just a number - mentality is what i look for first, then personality, then sexuality!

[Osyrus]

im 24. i find it hard to date men younger than myself- not exactly in the same mindset or they are not brave enough for me (apparently im rather beautiful and intimidate men)

i often find men in their late 20s and early 30s a good suite- they are some what established and secure in themselves.


oh but more OT: umm 36ish . willing to bend for the right person.

[Jevlin]

You're contradicting yourself, heavily. I don't know what 15 year old girl you're talking about, but most don't have the maturity for a truly intimate and dedicated relationship as a 25 year old, who is actually more likely to be more interested in settling down and moving into an apartment/house with her bf than a 15, plus she actually can because of her age.

Do we really need to argue this further, Idk what 15 year olds you know, or 25 year olds for that matter, but they are VASTLY different. The lessons in maturity you learn in college/workforce will definitely make a 25 year old woman far more mature than some 15 year old kid.

Okej, you obviously still don't understand what i'm talking about so i'll speak clearly this time so that it's impossible to misunderstand.

You are talking about intellectual maturity. I'm talking about sexual maturity! When you are 15 years old your body and mind is prepared for reproduction and no mental or physical harm is going to come to you as you're by definition sexually mature and you're no longer a child in that aspect. <-- This is where i feel it stops being pedophilia.

The social aspects of a relationship(that you're arguing about) is not included here as it's irrelevant to the subject you were discussing before about pedophilia. To refresh your memory:

4 years in either direction.I'm 18.

to which a response was made:

You sir are a sick pedophile.

hence my comment about how a 15 year old has the same sexual maturity (body and mind) as a 25 year old and it should therefor not be called pedophilia, especially if both parts are under 20 years of age. Are we on the same page now? Otherwise i can't really be arsed.

To avoid further confusion i'll quote myself and explain exactly what i mean.

a 15 year old has the same sexual maturity (body and mind) as a 25 year old

By body i mean physically the same (vagina, boobs, hips) to actually accommodate a penis and eventually give birth to a child.
By mind i mean to be emotionally (reptilian brain/fuck part of brain) the same to be able to handle the traumatizing event of fornication and eventually the raising of a child.

[Eliandal]

age is just a number - mentality is what i look for first, then personality, then sexuality!

Pretty much words to live by. My first 'real' relationship lasted 3 years. I was 19 and he was 37. It most likely would have lasted longer however I was not willing to relocate to the Phillipines at that time. My current 'relationship' has lasted 19 years now. We met through a mutual friend when I was 28 and he was (ugh) 18. While of course it was wonderful to parade around a 'teen' ;P...he wasn't 'young' in fact in many ways he was more mature than I was at that time.

Point being your soul knows no age limits, and when you find your soulmate - embrace it and to hell with what anyone else says (even his parents who originally called me 'the cradle robber' eventually came around - how couldn't they ! )

[TIMTIMf3]

Myself, I'm 21 years old and wouldn't go into a relationship with someone older than maybe 25-28.

[Zaelsino]

Eh, it's a personal thing. Men tend to come under a different sort of scrutiny than women when it comes to a "considerable" age difference, but it's never really been an issue for me. I generally go for girls around my own age, but I'm fine with a slightly more... experienced woman. Largest difference for me was probably eight years (me being 19; her being 27), but I wouldn't be adverse to going a little higher if the spark was there.

Twenty-two to fifty is pretty amusing though, OP. As is you getting on great with her daughter. >.>

[CaptUntsAhts]

I still don't see how that would be a problem, maybe it will cause some problems, but I don't consider it wrong.

Somebody call Chris Hansen...

[rederoin]

Somebody call Chris Hansen...

I never said I was having sex with her.

[khalypso]

Age is just a number. There are two important factors in a romantic relationship.

#1. Income. If you're poor, you should date poor. If you're rich you should date rich. If you're working class you should date working class. I would allow for at most a 25% discrepancy in income.

#2. Intelligence. Your match should be roughly the exact same level of intelligence as you. If you're both derp you'll get lost together, if you're both geniuses you'll come up with great ideas together and either way it will be good times, but if there is any discrepancy at all here the inevitable result is that the smart one will always blame the stupid one for their lower intelligence and the stupid one will always blame the smart one for their arrogance. I would allow for at most a 10% discrepancy in intelligence.

Age is just an optional tertiary factor, for the most part. After a certain age the amount of "life experience" left to be gained is limited, there are plenty of experiences but they all fit into a limited number of themes. I would say anybody who is old enough to have experienced a committed relationship that goes beyond that 1.5-3 year "honeymoon" phase and understands that a successful relationship has to be built upon a foundation other than emotions is fair game. Obviously they can't be so old that I don't find them attractive. To be honest I find the perfect female figure to be a voluptuous blonde, roughly 45-55 years in age.

I can still find women up to around 60 to be attractive but only if they take care of themselves. But I would say anything beyond that golden 55 year old mark, is where I wouldn't go. That would make for an age difference of roughly 27 years.

That both makes sense and is kinda bad at the same time haha

I don't really agree with the wealth part. Of course that sorta thing can become an issue but it shouldn't matter in a real relationship. From personal experience the only issue with wealth in relationships I've had has been when one of us wants to go out somewhere but the other can't afford it. That and going on holidays together.

The intelligence part actually makes a bit of sense. I've seen it in a lot of couples, moreso the derpy couples :P I dated an extremely dumb guy for a year, he was dumb but cared for me a lot so I didn't care at first. But it got to me so much by the end of it I just got so frustrated at him and the stupid things he said. One of my favourite dumb things he said was that birds evolved into dinosaurs. >_>

[Firebert]

There's a numerical algorithm for this.
Subtract seven from your age and then double it, and that's a maximum age you should date before it gets odd.
The reverse is half your age and then add seven, and can serve as a minimum.

I'm 23, which means my maximum age to date is 32 and minimum is 18.5.

[Krolikn]

No more than 10 years older than me.

[asharia]

Personally, any more than ~5ish years older than me, and i wouldn't feel like we could have a meaningful relationship. I'm male.

[woxingma]

How is that a horrible way to look at it?

There is no such emotion as "true love.". The emotion of love is the perfect natural drug to make you screw somebody, have children with them, and stick around just long enough that the mother can fend for herself again. It only lasts 1.5-3 years. If you determine that a relationship is over every time the butterflies in your stomach disappear then you'll be breaking a new heart every 1.5-3 years.

...

EDIT: But forever, endless, storybook love doesn't exist. The real true love, is when you look past selfish, feel good sensations, together, and build something, together. Hint: It's a choice, not an involuntary reaction.

BUT! in my experience, when you have a partner you are committed to you can get those butterflies at the most surprising times. It's fun to be in love! Of course I've only been married 10 years so who knows right?