Girlfriend broke up, the hard way

[Deleted]

To be together with my best friend.

Does she have any friends? or failing that does he have a sister

[Deleted]

He should be mad at her, not him. She's the cheating bastard.

true ...
the only reason a guy should do his best friends gf is to prove that she'd cheat on him ...
but in that case the guy wouldn't hide it for 5 days ... that's my idea of a "Bro" !

[Deleted]

She never loved you.. you were the way to get to him. So she could get closer to him she used you.

[wraisp]

I say Good ridence

[Deleted]

Just move on. I know it's easier said than done, but it's the only option. It sucks at first but you slowly care less and less, especially when you realise that there actually are a lot more fish in the sea. Tasty fish...

[Deleted]

Oh dude, I'm so sorry to hear that ..

I hate when people tell me "get over it" or "time heals all wounds". And im expecting you're getting a lot of it (and will continue to hear it, in this thread), so I'm not gonna go there.

I know from personal experience, that keeping it bottled up, turns it into hatred. You cant really hate anyone for their feelings. You can hate them for making you feel your own feelings, even though they dont mean it as a personal attack. That doesn't make you feel any better of course, and I'm sorry, but nothing will. Even if your ex-girlfriend comes back, you can never trust her again; and how could you?
It's a sad story, and I am truly sorry you have to go through it. The best advice I can give is, talk to your friend.. Invite him over, get his point of view; and his feelings. Did he even feel bad doing this? Has it haunted him, is it? Did he even think of you? How he could do it?

To say something that might cheer you up: you mention him being.. "weird".. I'm guessing she isn't. That wont last. They'll have too many differences. So take make something positive from all the negative feelings, she may have chose him over you, but in the long run, she chose none of you. I dont know if it helps, im not an oracle, but from my experience that's what happends.
Best of luck to you, I hope you find a way out of the state you're in.
- Damsbo.

Thanks for your long post. I talked to him on saturday. He didn't feel any guilt. He said me straight in the face "She's better of with me". A lot of my friends are saying that this won't last long between them. Thanks again for your post..

[Deleted]

You just won, you got rid of a false friend and an easy chick, when you finish grief you'll feel 10x better than before. For future reference, the only woman you're allowed to qq in front is your mom, never do it w another.

Nicely put. Can't really add anything else, but this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTJ7AzBIJoI#!

"Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours."

Enjoy

[AmerikanRejekt]

Miserable people cling to miserable people. Just let her go. He wasn't looking out for you as best friends should, and she obviously isn't for you.

You'll find that special girl someday, man. 16 years without a girlfriend taught me that patience is key.

[Deleted]

This is really sad, and I do feel sorry for you.

Your friend is a total asshole, and clearly isn't someone you want to be friends with. I know right now it is hard to see the light in this situation, but be thankful this happened before things got majorly serious, and moved on. Life is full of bumps, I've had girlfriends that dumped me, and I felt devastated, but if they didn't I wouldn't have met my current girlfriend (of 5 years) and we're moving on strong.

No matter what, everything has a positive side. Just find yours in this, and all will be fine.

[Gotjuice]

Look it seems like the end of the world but you're young and have your whole life ahead of you. She wasn't worth it, he wasn't worth it and he wasn't a real friend. As I see it you got off easy could have been much worse. The best thing you can do is not think about it and move on. You'll have to do it eventually better do it sooner than later, easier said that done I know but still the truth. Good luck dude and keep ya head up.

PS. Just to show you it could have been worse I'ma tell you a story of a long time friend of mine. He met this girl in college and after like a year together they went on an exchange program to Europe together (we are from the Caribbean) so they spent the whole semester together in Spain and then took the 2 summer months to travel around together (France, Italy, etc.) the thing is when they finally came back, I'm talking the same day they got back from their trip, they went to unpack and get some sleep and shit. He woke up and called her but she didn't answer so he thought she was sleeping and went to her apartment. The door was open and he found her in bed with some dude.

[Tuvok]

There's no easy way to overcome such betrayal. You must remain strong and not let this defeat you. Life is full of challenges, and this is one of the hardest you will face for a long time, but now is the time to prove what you have within you. Now is the time to show the world that you will not be so easily defeated, and while yes, you hurt badly, you will slowly recover and you will not give in.

What you should be proud of is that this gets to you this much, it means you are still human, more human than most people. Some day once all this is forgotten you will be with someone that appreciates that, the person you will die loving. My brother, take heart and be strong, because doing so is the best hope we have of ending up where we want to be.

[Deleted]

Does she have any friends? or failing that does he have a sister

12 y'old stepsister, notso goodlooking friends.

[Ianus]

i must say as i was in similar situation and i just broke up all connections with them even though even now i sometimes regret why i didn't put him in hospital as last memory of best friend .. evil laugh...

[lvlark]

I don't know if the love between them is just a short affair because I didn't care well enough about her the last month..

I don't mean to give you false hope. But, don't jump to conclusions. If you've been with each other for a longer period (say, a year or so), a month of being less close to each other can impact your relationship temporary. Been there myself.

OTOH I once almost dumped my now ex for another girl. Almost, because I loved her alot, and at that moment still wanted to go on with her. It worked out, for somewhat longer, but in the end, not so much.
However, me and my ex are still friend, we still care about each other.

Bottom line will be this I think: The three of you (since you're saying it's your best friend) know each other pretty well, there will always be good things to share with one another. IF, and only if, you manage to keep cool and stay friendly through this.

Not saying time will heal all wounds, but time _will_ tell the outcome of this. I hope you won't have screwed up your (friendly or lover) relationship before that.

[Ishimada]

I could say I had a tough childhood too, but I would never use it as an excuse on things like these. I had a little same kind of situation here. Only that girl only was my friend, and her boyfriend just umm, not so much.

But the situation got quite serious. We liked each other, and sometimes she could kiss me and I her. It really happened 4 times in 5 months.

Thing is, I had to stop. Because she told what she really wanted, and she's going to get engaged. I feel like a piece of sh*t, I never had this close "contact" with people, and I really like her, or perhaps from now on I could say, I likeD her. Now I just have to move forward. Anyways, we promised to be friends, close or not but still. We get along pretty well.

[Yummie]

You really need to punch that guy in the face.

I agree! ^ Not that violence is the answer, but if your friend and your Girlfriend went behind your back you should beat the shit out of him (:

[cypher1169]

Trust me when I say this LET IT BE. Let her go bro her mind will blow up with what ifs and such. Don't contact her, don't contact your friend MOVE FORWARD one step at a time I assure you as someone who has been through exactly this it will get better...w/e happens you are still young and there are so so so soooo many others out there. She's the one losing out!

[grandpab]

I don't know what to do.

I don't think there's anything you can do. You lost a friend and a girl friend. A real friend wouldn't do what your friend did, and a girl that actually cares about you wouldn't do that either. Neither of them are worth keeping around.

[lvlark]

If he is saying that, then he really *is* a prick.

This is true. He could say something like "but we love each other", which may be true, but not that, which disrespects you.

[dokilar]

It will hurt for awhile, there is no magic pill to get over it other than time. Ten years from now you will look back and think "WoW, I'm glad that happened. Why was I ever with that horrible person."

narcotics are a great way to help!!

lol no seriously, that sucks dude. like many have said theres 2 things to be learnt from this scenario. 1) he's not your best friend and 2) shes not the one for you. best thing to do is surround yourself with your other friends and consistently stay active. do whatever you like to do and do it often, the more you keep your mind off of it the better you'll feel.

when i divorced my ex wife i took up running. if i was ever sitting around the house and started to think about it i got up off my ass and ran until i couldnt run anymore. got me in shape and it helped as when i got home i was too tired and/or worn out to really think about it!