Recent Blue Posts
Recent Forum Posts
2012-10-09, 12:14 AM
#121
2012-10-09, 05:08 PM
#122
2012-10-10, 11:46 AM
#123
2012-10-11, 10:17 AM
#124
New Bond film's theme performed by Adele.
A rare example of something beginning when the fat lady sings.
2012-10-12, 08:34 AM
#125
My brother and I laugh at how competitive we were as kids.
But I laugh more.
2012-10-12, 04:01 PM
#126
Sadly, because we keep eating the eggs, the Cadbury Creme has now almost become extinct.
2012-10-13, 09:21 AM
#127
We had a team building competition at work.
And I won!
2012-10-14, 04:50 PM
#128
"I've got good news and bad news," the doctor told me.
"Alright, I'll have the bad news first then", I replied.
"You have terminal cancer."
What's the good news?"
"The good news is for the other patient."
2012-10-14, 10:49 PM
#129
Pythagoras walks into a bar muttering, 'If a right-angled triangle has a short side, X, a long side, Y, and hypotenuse, Z, then the square of Z must be equal to the sum of the square of X and the square of, erm... uh...'
The barman says, 'Y, the long face?'
2012-10-15, 09:54 AM
#130
Felix Baumgartner has just found the ball from Chris Waddle's penalty in World Cup 1990.
2012-10-15, 05:57 PM
#131
Picking up a tiny piece of paper off the carpet would probably only take me one second...
But for some reason I'd rather vacuum over it 100 times, at different angles...
2012-10-16, 11:41 AM
#132
"So, Mr Adams." The lady at the jobcentre said, "After nearly 20 years in full time employment, you just decided to leave. May I ask why?"
"Well," I said, "I opened a Twitter account, and after about a week I decided that my whole career had been a total waste of time. So I left."
"And what was this career?" She asked.
"I was an English teacher."
2012-10-16, 03:55 PM
#133
Apparently when you spend £5 on a coffee in Costa you get a free mug.
Just stop by the nearest mirror to see it.
2012-10-17, 12:19 PM
#134
For our chemistry exam we had to write a thousand words on acid.
Unfortunately my pen turned into a gorilla and the floor melted.
2012-10-18, 10:12 AM
#135
I've just discovered that someone I worked with about eight years ago likes Hovis. And yet some people still say Facebook's a waste of time?
2012-10-18, 05:15 PM
#136
According to an article in today's Daily Mail about personal hygiene, most people have detectable amounts of shit on their hands at any given time.
Nonsense, I thought.
Then I realised it was probably true, as I'd just been holding a copy of the Daily Mail.
2012-10-19, 11:07 AM
#137
Americans: Iran and Iraq are countries, not Apple products, so say their names properly.
2012-10-19, 04:47 PM
#138
Some OP obliterates required.
2012-10-20, 09:54 AM
#139
Missing: £500 reward.
If you find it, you get a cat.
2012-10-20, 08:39 PM
#140
If I get home from work and my wife has cooked dinner, I'll eat my hat.
Instead.
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