Beardz (z for zinginess)

[Deleted]

Goddamnit I need a beard.

I'm fed up of being a plushy-faced childlike waste of space. I need a great big bushy beard so I can start to assume some authority in this place. Does the heavy desire to grow a beard result in no facial hair under Murphy's Law?

I ask you, Champions, is a beard not the finest instrument of destruction and sexual arousal simultaneously?

[Bosen]

It can be awesome.

[Joathen]

My woman claims my beard is a massive turn-on. Sad that I'll have to shave it for the service come November...

[Joey Ray III]

as a self-proclaimed 'hairiest asshole on this planet' i say beards are overrated. most people need a month to grow what i grow in 3 days.

[Calzaeth]

The question is never 'Should I grow a beard?', or 'Is, truly, a beard the answer to all my prayers?'!

The question is: 'Why haven't I graced my face with hairy awesomeness yet? And the answer is always 'Because I'll begin tomorrow'.

[xskarma]

With great beards, comes great responsibility.


Just so you know though (and feel better about not having a big bushy beard) it's kind of an annoyance with the hot weather we are having. You're kinda sweating underneath the hair and can't really get at it to wipe it away. I've been soaking my face + beard in water a few times past week just to get rid of the feeling of being a sweaty bearded monster.

In anything other than hot, sweaty weather it rules though, no doubt.

[Mikehuntz]

as a self-proclaimed 'hairiest asshole on this planet' i say beards are overrated. most people need a month to grow what i grow in 3 days.

Takes you only 3 days? psh rookie try 5 hours and I get stubble

[Kalyyn]

Sadly, I have to keep my beard pretty neatly trimmed. I can't grow it out for weeks like I used to.

[Schmiggy]

I just saw these guys play live yesterday at my uni, I've never felt so emasculated..

[Belize]

We need a TLO beard up in here.

[Schmiggy]

It's worth noting that there is a linear relationship between beard length and IQ - a beard also improves ones performance in all masculine roles in which they previously sucked.

[Butler to Baby Sloths]

I've taken mine back down to stubble for now, a beard is no fun in 35°C weather (90% humidity)

[Deleted]

I think beards suck. They're not very hygienic and most women don't like them. Stubble is fine though, because I really don't like shaving every day.

Also, I get the feeling people are making up these silly 'facts' about beards only to boost their self-esteem.
"Beards make you more manly, beards make you more sexually attractive for girls, beards make you smarter, yadda yadda".
No, you either have self-esteem or you don't... or another way of putting it is "it's the beard on the inside that counts".

[Deleted]

I feel that if I gained a beard I would instantly become much stronger. Can any of you bearded folk confirm this?

[Schmiggy]

I think beards suck. They're not very hygienic and most women don't like them. Stubble is fine though, because I really don't like shaving every day.

Also, I get the feeling people are making up these silly 'facts' about beards only to boost their self-esteem.
"Beards make you more manly, beards make you more sexually attractive for girls, beards make you smarter, yadda yadda".
No, you either have self-esteem or you don't... or another way of putting it is "it's the beard on the inside that counts".

I believe what you're referring to is humour. I don't think anyone actually believes any of those things.

[mistuhbull]

having a beard increases the size of you wing-wang by 600%

This is a truefact.

[Blood Fox]

I think beards suck. They're not very hygienic and most women don't like them.

A: no you suck
B: Meh, they are if you keep them clean and such
C: do it because you like it, you don't want a woman who doesn't like a beard do you?

Ps, joking about the you suck thing

[Wishblade]

I do enjoy beards, they really can make a man look amazing if done right. Sad I don't have good beard genes... *sits down among the non-viking Scandinavians*

If you want it, get it.

[Landin55]

I do enjoy beards, they really can make a man look amazing if done right. Sad I don't have good beard genes... *sits down among the non-viking Scandinavians*

If you want it, get it.

Milk drinker! But anyhow I also can't grow an awesome beard but i'll stick to my goatee.

[shadey81]

I think beards suck. They're not very hygienic and most women don't like them. Stubble is fine though, because I really don't like shaving every day.

spoken by someone that's never had a beard

firstly they aren't unhygienic, that is a silly myth. It's just hair and it can be cared for the same as hair on your head by shampooing/conditioning it or rinsing it in water.

and really are you that insecure you aren't going to grow one because some women don't like it, is your sense of style dictated by what women want. pretty sad.