First off, I don't want to insult anyone, offend anyone or give anyone negative thoughts about me. but since the chance of encountering one of you guys in LFR is quite slim, i'm going to be brutally honest about my bad habits in LFR. I just want to come clean with this, and hope I can put this part aside me (not yet behind, I don't think i'm ready yet for that).
so let's begin. for as long as I've done LFR on my paladin, even from DS, I have often ninjapulled trash and then blamed it on a tab targeting malfunction, or a bug where it targets a mob i'm not in combat with. Sometimes genuinely on accident, but mostly on purpose. Sometimes we wiped, sometimes we managed just fine, but I got some perverted pleasure from every time that this ended up in the trash hulking out and killing players multiple times, often causing them to ragequit. I was not always happy from this, but sometimes it cheered me up after a long arduous day of getting no progress at all during my job and having to cycle home in the rain afterwards.
Sometimes, when my trinket was about to fade, I would pull the boss as a DPS so that I wouldn't lose my 6-9 stacks of the buff due to slow tanks.
That 40K Survival hunter whose main damage was his pet auto? I called him out, often with the intent of mocking him. I loved calling out the bad players in the raid, because I knew that for the only measuring stick LFR cared about, I am usually in the top 5, and always above the requirement.
Ignoring adds? I did it. Standing in voidzones? I did it. watching a DVD on my second screen? guilty as charged. I did not do this with the intention of wiping the raid (that costs me gold and time. I could usually avoid getting killed on the trash so that was less of an issue.), but I simply ignored most tactics in the mindset of "it's LFR, it's designed for people who struggle putting on penny loafers, there are others who do the right thing. shit dies regardless."
now, I did not do this all the time. I just did this when the fight was still for fun, and when I knew that the raid could handle it. I expressly don't do it when doing it means we would wipe. I didn't DPS through defensive stance. I switched to the add when it was needed. I did move the beams around correctly. I did start to act responsibly when there were a few dead but it was still salvageable. and most importantly, after the second stack of determination I dropped the "it's fun" pretended facade entirely and began doing the right thing, even if it meant dropping the fun thing.
I do not ask for understanding, since many of you wouldn't understand. I don't ask for forgiveness, since a number of you are rumored to do the same. I don't feel like I was doing the right OR the wrong thing, I feel like I was doing the personally correct thing. Ingame I have my own morals and rights, working within the confines of Blizzards morals, rights and duties, because I feel it's better to be a moderate psycho in a computergame than it is to be one IRL. IRL, I will act Lawful Neutral. but in a game, if the confines of the game allow it without too severe of a punishment, I will go full chaotic evil. Renegade, Dark Side, psychotic bastard, call it whatever you want, but I refer to it as Evil Genius, because it's the only place where being evil is morally acceptable and often even encouraged. but when being Evil is the dumb thing and doesn't gain me anything except losses, I switch to being responsible.
oh, and one more thing which some of you will agree with, others not: I love being kicked. I used to hate it and be offended by it, but once I realized it's just a game, I started to laugh about it. and now, I know that whenever someone kicks me, that hidden timer will increase the time I can be the moderate psycho next time.
Now that you've read my side of the story, and that you have gotten a glimpse of my internal struggle, I wonder how you feel about this, and whether you think I deserve praise (unlikely) or punishment.