How big of an age gap is needed to be considered weird for dating for 21 year olds?

[halfawake]

If you're looking for a fling that's fine, but a 17 year old is probably in an unstable part of their lives. College or even just self exploration opens up a lot and frankly if you're looking for something steady you just might get your heart broken.

[Seirith]

Completely anecdotal, but I would call a 21 year old that much more mature than a 17 year old. 21 is still pretty damn young. Also there is really no set in stone age for maturity.

OP if you two get along go with it. Hell she will be 18 in less than a year anyway, so the law is really not that big of a concern. Hell again, even a lot of states the age of consent is 16.

Personally, I believe everyone matures at a different rate and at a different age. At 16 I got my first job and worked 20 hours every week until I finished HS when I got a full time job. I also helped my mother take care of my grandmother. I always had a B+ or better average in school as well. I wasn't perfect but I was a lot more mature than my friends who skipped school and partied all the time. In fact of my HS group of friends I am one of the few who has not been divorced already. My HS boyfriend and I are now married and still going strong, 14 years are meeting.

[Clever Trev]

16-55 is fair game imo, grass on the wicket? play cricket!

[Dammagia]

4 years really? That's not an issue at all.

Make it somewhat in the 30 - 40 years range, to call it rather weird.

This TBH, once you are older then a mere 4 year age gap will seem like nothing. The rule of thumb is half your age + 7 years, which means 17 should be fine.

[Gniral]

lol you're worried about a 4-years difference? in 2012?

[Jackmoves]

This is just stupid, she isn't going to be 17 forever, and if you genuinely like her (which is fine, she is a woman physically at this point) by the time you have really got to know her she will already be 18. Surely your biggest worry is not about going to clubs together? Which to be honest girls often get away with under age anyway.

Age shouldnt really have an importance. When I was 18 I met a girl that I got on with amazingly well and we very much liked each other, I had no idea after having seen many many pictures I believed her to be closer to my age but she later revealed she was only 14, regardless of this we couldn't be together anyway as she lived too far away, we remained good friends. Later when she was 19 (i was 23) we started talking more often and she came to stay with me for a summer, same old flame was there and on mental maturity we were probably on the same page despite the 4 year gap. Relationship didn't last due to distance (was not realistic to drop either of our lives to be together), we still remain good friends.

The point is that mental or physical appearance can't really point to the age of someone (atleast to an extent). Someone in their early 20's with 16-18 year olds really isnt unusual or wrong, most of the girls in school with me had older boyfriends as girls generally mature faster than guys both physically and mentally.

Age can certainly make a difference, unless you do nothing with your life. I'm not saying it's impossible by any means or that age gaps are wrong, my girlfriend is 25, 3 years younger then me, we've been together for over 3 years now, but the older you get the more life experience you gather up. Dating a minor certainly brings practical problems in to the equation. Age restrictions are one of them, and as I said in my 2nd post, we were out all the time during that period, so yeah it would have been a real problem for me, I like to socialize with my friends.

I would never, ever even consider dating a 18 year old nowdays for example, fuck she would be just out of high school! I'd feel like a dirty pedo.

Maturity goes hand in hand with life experience, yes there are other aspects to it as well, but disregarding that "is just stupid".

[Aveyai]

The age gap acceptance gets larger as people get older...Personally I would think 17 is pushing it if your 21. I definitely wouldn't go younger but 17 is kind of borderline. However, as I said the acceptance increases as you age. If you were 32 and she was 28 I wouldn't see a problem. Right now she is nearing the end of high school and you are nearing the end of your bachelor degree. You are kind of in different phases of life right now.

[Chakra]

On topic, see below.

http://xkcd.com/314/

That is all.

Age slash 2 + 7. It's brilliant, lol.

[dinouille]

stop do what the people told you to do

fuck them all, if it's ok for u, then go, stop living whit the rules of other people, make your own rules, or you will never go anywhere

[Buttfear]

Go for older women, like 30s or 40s. Teenagers and 20 somethings are mostly unstable and will leave you thinking you're insane. The older ladies also have a lot to teach you in the sack where young women are clueless.

[jmmathe1988]

I would say no younger than 16 at your age, BUT I would make sure you have her parents on your side! Otherwise your just asking for drama, and that's just not fun from any angle! I know because my sister was seeing a guy at 16 when he was 22 and my mom went bonkers! Wouldn't let him in the house, threatened to call the cops any time he showed up near my sister, and when my sister decided to run off 2 hours way to spend the night with him she made me go with and kick the door in and bring her home!

Either way it is a bit creepy to date younger in my opinion and something many frown upon, its different when both partners are past 18...This chick that had an affair with me was 26 and her husband was 47, I was baffled by that lmao...but the sex was good so yea! Lasted about 3 months, and was fun while it lasted

[Clever Trev]

Go for older women, like 30s or 40s. Teenagers and 20 somethings are mostly unstable and will leave you thinking you're insane. The older ladies also have a lot to teach you in the sack where young women are clueless.

not neccesarily the only woman ive been with was 33 when i was 19 and lets just say she never made me "happy" without me finishing up for her. she was irish too so maybe its an irish thing:P

[Babytaco]

I don't think it's right for anyone out of high school to date someone still in high school. There is just a HUGE difference in maturity.

[Argroth]

If she is in highschool and you are old enough to be out of highschool, thats when things get awkward creepy and many would say wrong. That's the biggest factor I see, don't date her if she is still in highschool I'd say.

As a general rule there is the formula

(Your age/2) + 7= the minimum age you should date

For me personally I don't go below 3 years younger then me because I couldn't imagine dating a girl younger then my brother. That will probably change over time when it gets harder to meet someone within my age range in the real world (outside University/college) but right now I pretty much see everyone under my brothers age as childish and kinda stupid/naive

[Wildtree]

This TBH, once you are older then a mere 4 year age gap will seem like nothing. The rule of thumb is half your age + 7 years, which means 17 should be fine.

I would have never been married, nor would my son have ever existed.
I was 22 and my wife was 17 when we met. We married a half year later.. I was 23 then and she was 18. Another 1 1/3 years later my son was born.
But then, we're Germans and we don't see a problem there. Legal age is 16 in Germany for sexual relationships.

[dense]

I would have never been married, nor would my son have ever existed.
I was 22 and my wife was 17 when we met. We married a half year later.. I was 23 then and she was 18. Another 1 1/3 years later my son was born.
But then, we're Germans and we don't see a problem there. Legal age is 16 in Germany for sexual relationships.

is 14 in germany, you were more than good

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of...Europe#Germany

[Jackmoves]

is 14 in germany, you were more than good

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of...Europe#Germany

Think it's similiar in all European countries, 13-16 in most I think.

[Wildtree]

is 14 in germany, you were more than good

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of...Europe#Germany

Thank you
It changed in 1994. I was long married by then. I believe in my case the limit was 16 tho..... Either way we were good in the face of the law.

[FeliciaMarie]

To me, that's a *little* bit much. If she's in HS and you're in college then to me it just seems a little bit much :/

[Auloria]

Be hyper aware of the laws in your state, and also be aware that a 17-year-old girl might really be 15. Don't have sex without a birth certificate in hand, if daddy gets pissed off then your ass is going to jail. :P