Depressed after 20th birthday

[saltyharbls]

Wtf all you people who think because you've had tough periods in your life that if has to be on your mind 24/7 and define you for the rest of your life.

Your a human with a brain. You should be able to process a situation and come to understand that sometimes in life you cant control everything and things don't always go your way. If you're sadly dealt a bad hand and have an illness (mental/physical) you should eventually come to understand that concentrating on the positive things in your life will make you happier. Thinking about the bad stuff wont make it go away. You shouldn't ignore it but you shouldn't let it control your outlook on everyone or everything.

But according to senjinone this is wrong? According to him you can control every aspect of your life and make it perfect whatever situation you encounter.

You two need to lay of the weed or something and take a look at real life. This is going to be one of those threads where people will make arguments and you
will deflect them with a bunch of hippie-logic and it will repeat forever. Im out of this thread.

GLHF!

[Senjinone]

But according to senjinone this is wrong? According to him you can control every aspect of your life and make it perfect whatever situation you encounter.

You two need to lay of the weed or something and take a look at real life. This is going to be one of those threads where people will make arguments and you
will deflect them with a bunch of hippie-logic and it will repeat forever. Im out of this thread.

GLHF!

Nope i have never said that at all. You are distorting my words utterly and it makes you look like a dork
I said you can controll how you feel no matter what happens, not what happens.
Any idiot with a brain at all understands you cant controll what happens, that would be very very wierd. How can you even think like that?
But it is your chooice how you feel and react to any thing that happens.

yea leave the thread, you will not be missed as you bring so much negative toughts

[phenix]

But according to senjinone this is wrong? According to him you can control every aspect of your life and make it perfect whatever situation you encounter.

You two need to lay of the weed or something and take a look at real life. This is going to be one of those threads where people will make arguments and you
will deflect them with a bunch of hippie-logic and it will repeat forever. Im out of this thread.

GLHF!

I don't know the other poster and i didn't read every post but i gather he/she said you can control how you perceive life, not life itself.

My only problem is i have too much common sense. I rationalize stuff fairly quickly. Some ppl seem to think if you're dealt a bad hand you must suffer for ever. I don't understand that. Im not deflecting anything, i have yet to see an argument as to why someone (an individual with his brain) cant eventually come to understand they can choose to see a situation in their own perspective...not how society think you should.

[dextersworld]

I just turned 30 and it aint getting much better

[Senjinone]

I don't know the other poster and i didn't read every post but i gather he/she said you can control how you perceive life, not life itself.

My only problem is i have too much common sense. I rationalize stuff fairly quickly. Some ppl seem to think if you're dealt a bad hand you must suffer for ever. I don't understand that. Im not deflecting anything, i have yet to see an argument as to why someone (an individual with his brain) cant eventually come to understand they can choose to see a situation in their own perspective...not how society think you should.

Yey! More people that get it!

[ifrah]

Close to 30 here, and although that the childhood and teenage years had their shine, and in certain point of view were the best days of my life so far, I don't look back at them depressed or anything like that. There's plenty of more for life to give you other than just getting old and having the used-to-be-invincible body to start to fail. Getting a grade is cool, as is getting the first "real" full-time job. Growing independent and having your own apartment is not that bad either . Dating women, not the confused teenage kids that don't know what they want and have mood swings 10 times a day, is pretty nice too, as is eventually after the young years turning the volume down and settling down for the long-term relationship. Having kids can be fun, I'm not there yet though, maybe one day. Being more confident. Having life experience. Traveling is effing awesome, no way I could have done that at my teen years. Moving abroad permanently if you please is an option too. The list goes on..
The ease of life comes down with age, but as a good trade-off chances of doing whatever you like, do skyrocket. It's up to you what you make your life when you grow up.
What a bunch of cliche, but what the hell, don't waste your life. Getting started is always the hardest part, after that the rest goes by itself.

[Iceleaf]

People should not offer advice to people with depression unless you have firsthand experience with it or psychiatric training. Shtap. Support is different tho and not (always) just about advice.

[Varabently]

It gets worse. Im 30 now, most everyone I know has let themselves go, lives for drugs or hordes animals, and the one woman I liked I was an asshole to because I know she is better without me. You see the ruin you are and how you disappoint your family and how they would be better off if you died or just went away.

Cant find things to make yourself happy, so you turn to old things that made you happy and find those are lacking too. I try and purge all childhood memories and reminders from my life.

Wait until your thinking back and realize all the chances and progress you have pissed away, that is does not matter what you get you will not be fulfilled, you can work hard get a nice house and car and still not care for them. Then there is the moment when you realize that the only way you will ever have a decent woman again is if you pay her.

You're 30, your progress isn't over yet.

edit: On a constructive note, do you exercise? Eat healthy? These biological things have a huge impact on mood. Nostalgia is hard to break, but maybe you should think about where you want to see yourself in 10 years. What do you need to do to accomplish that? Set up realistic, small goals to reach it.

[Ultimate Gohan]

Wowwww! Thats nice to hear buddy ! up in the air !!!!!!!

[Combooticus]

You will be pleased to know it will only get worse as you get older

soon you will be a cynical old bastard like me

so just roll with it and get used to it

[Frazzle.d]

The important thing to consider is that everything changes, even families over time. It's important to find your center, get yourself busy doing things and get focused on the future and making it happen. Everything falls into place after that.

[Linaver]

Get a cat.

[Shink]

You'll feel much much worse when you start separating yourself away from the image of "young people"

[Maleren]

It is normal and you will feel better. As others have said, pretty soon you'll look up and realize a year has gone by, 2 years, 5, then 10 and you'll wonder where it went. Try not to be too hard on yourself and roll with the punches. One day you'll look back and wish you were 20 all over again. Take care and I wish you the best of luck.

[Sersel]

You'll feel much much worse when you start separating yourself away from the image of "young people"

This works. It really does.
Not doing it will makes you think you are old among those youngsters.
Once you take part of life beyond school you will get into an environment with a lot of older people where you will feel young and energetic.

But acceptance that getting older is part of life is a must, try making a list what the benefits of getting older could be, not watching at your parents as they clearly are not good example for you. Try talking to older family or relatives that do enjoy life and ask them what they think it is what makes them differ from ie your parents.

Stay pro-active.