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  1. #21
    Immortal Treelife's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vigtrious View Post
    There's a difference between hassling people and brushing off everything they say, not taking their circumstances into account and such things. BIG BIG difference.
    I must be doing it wrong then, me and that bastard Thass always abuse each other...


    (Yeah I know there's a difference, just playing around )

  2. #22
    High Overlord Meralus II's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Treelife View Post
    I must be doing it wrong then, me and that bastard Thass always abuse each other...


    (Yeah I know there's a difference, just playing around )
    Ahhh I get ya then :P Yeah I know I treat my good friends the same as well. It's funny to hassle them but when it comes to be serious they are understanding and there for you. They know their limits as well.

    This guy just sounds like a real dick.

  3. #23
    Epic! Blockygame's Avatar
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    Explain to him that you would rather not be spoken to like that, nothing, and I can't stress this enough, nothing, is worse than breaking contact with a close friend over what ultimately can be viewed later on down the line as petty behavior, you've probably been through worse with this person and remember that they still care about you and what you think, even though it might not seem like it at times.
    HOOKED ON DIABLOL, GOOD TIMES ARE BEING HAD

  4. #24
    Quote Originally Posted by Treelife View Post
    I must be doing it wrong then, me and that bastard Thass always abuse each other...


    (Yeah I know there's a difference, just playing around )
    Why am I always dragged into these things?
    "Reason is not automatic. Those who deny it cannot be conquered by it." - Ayn Rand

  5. #25
    Nobody can really make this decision for you. Weigh the situation and previous situations; if this has happened before then you know the pattern and record. And then decide whether this friendship is worth it, for you, to put up with similar behavior in the future. It's not likely to stop, people usually won't change just because someone asks them to.

    So the real question is, is it worth it? Not for anyone here on the forums but you yourself.

  6. #26
    Immortal Treelife's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thassarian View Post
    Why am I always dragged into these things?
    Because you cling to my feet.

    (Last OT comment, I promise!)

  7. #27
    I would create space in between him, or try to strengthen the bond. Don't abandon each other, but it sounds like you need the space. Everything changes with time, it could just be that you're both too young and one of you is maturing faster than the other.

    Also, joining the Air Force to be a pilot.. Not easy, and no one will care that you've driven gokarts at competition level. You either need to get accepted to the Academy, OTS, or ROTC. (You'll probably be better off getting a Bachelors degree before you attempt this at all) Your ability to get the fighter track (T-38s) will depend on your relative class ranking, your instructors' input, the needs of the Air Force (how many of each type of pilot they need), and the desires of your classmates. The jet that you get will depend on your class rank, the input of your instructors, the needs of the Air Force, and the desires of your classmates. I'm pretty sure the training is still around 55 weeks. You could complete this entire 55 week ordeal and find out that you're actually "Piloting" an Unmanned Aerial Vehicle or a B52.

    So if you want to do it, devote your life to it, do the research and excel in every way possible. And if you decide to join the military, and pursue another career, make sure you know which one you're getting.

  8. #28
    Mechagnome Alakir the Windlord's Avatar
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    It's not worth it to cut ties due to something as minor as that. I'd say it's best to pretend it didn't happen.

  9. #29
    Brewmaster mittacc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stir View Post
    Ehm...
    1: He says you're violent. You dispute that (in bold capital letters). That makes me side with him on that one. You probably are violent. Oh; I'm not saying abnormally, or anything the like.
    2: Your friend was right. The story was about his father, and not about you. From your post, I understand that you do have a tendency to make matters about you, personally. His response (the way you wrote it) doesn't sound very accusing, condescending or nasty in any way, and your response to that (to this board of anonymous sympathizers) grants us evidence that you díd in fact make it about you, as you completely disregard his feelings, as well as the surgery of his father, in favour of your own near-surgery during a much earlier event.

    So... If I were you, I'd take a step back and take a look at myself. Maybe, just maybe, your 'friend' isn't the one in the wrong here.
    And maybe, your friend is the one trying to cut ties to you, rather than the other way around.
    I know you don't want to hear (or rather: read) this, but you should really analyze your behaviour.

    Good luck.
    1: Yes ofcourse i made it bold with capital letters. He just said that i was going to join the airforce just to get control over a jet and start attacking my own capital...
    It was the second friend's dad we talked about, not the one i think acts respectless. I said ''yeah, that's not good. I did almost need surgery with my hand, lucky that i didn't have to'' to empathize that surgery was a really negative thing and that i'm grateful that i didn't have to do it, it is called to be able to relate to the thing. The first friend then said ''yeah, well this is the leg'' as if my hand wasn't the same thing.

    ---------- Post added 2012-12-26 at 02:19 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Vigtrious View Post
    I had a friend like this when I was 17 and he treated me exactly how you described and looked at me as being "violent" so one day I got sick of his crap and showed him just how "violent" I can be. Hit the f*cker so hard he never said a wrong word to me again. Not saying this is the answer though.

    I will say this, true friends don't act that way and will always take your situations and such into consideration. When I went though times with my family my true friends understood how I was feeling and that I was angry/different.
    I'm not going to hit him...
    Last edited by mittacc; 2012-12-26 at 01:20 PM.

  10. #30
    The Patient Flagobha's Avatar
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    Tell him that you don't like the way he is treating you, and if you can't say it face to face (wich can be hard to say to someone you known all your life), write a letter or write to him on skype or any similiar and say you are serious about it. A friend should be understanding, so put him to the test.

  11. #31
    Just explain how you feel and ask him to quit being an assjerk and so egocentric.
    If he still keeps looking down to you, i'd break the connection, it's not worth it to have 'friends' like that.

    Judging your education and goals in life you're definately not stupid, focus on that, try to be a jet pilot and most likely in less then 10 years you're the one laughing at him by having a more beautifull girl, a better job and a better social life.

    You know, people don't like to hang that kind of people, he's probably going through the best 5 years of his life being an asshat in his teens, then he will come to an age people will puke on guys like that.
    Quote Originally Posted by nnelson54 View Post
    I don't celebrate National Native Americans Welcomed Us With Open Arms and Helped Us Survive the First Winter That We Were Woefully Unprepared For and We Repaid Them By Taking Their Lands, Raping Their Women and Murdering Them Day....
    Several Indian tribes see this holiday as the beginning of a process by which they tragically lost their land, and their population was decimated. Every year Indians come together in Plymouth to commemorate their "national day of mourning."

  12. #32
    Old God
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    Quote Originally Posted by wdmshmo View Post
    I would create space in between him, or try to strengthen the bond. Don't abandon each other, but it sounds like you need the space. Everything changes with time, it could just be that you're both too young and one of you is maturing faster than the other.

    Also, joining the Air Force to be a pilot.. Not easy, and no one will care that you've driven gokarts at competition level. You either need to get accepted to the Academy, OTS, or ROTC. (You'll probably be better off getting a Bachelors degree before you attempt this at all) Your ability to get the fighter track (T-38s) will depend on your relative class ranking, your instructors' input, the needs of the Air Force (how many of each type of pilot they need), and the desires of your classmates. The jet that you get will depend on your class rank, the input of your instructors, the needs of the Air Force, and the desires of your classmates. I'm pretty sure the training is still around 55 weeks. You could complete this entire 55 week ordeal and find out that you're actually "Piloting" an Unmanned Aerial Vehicle or a B52.
    He's swedish, but yeah becoming a pilot in the Air force is gonna be A LOT of hard work.

    OP go for it if you really want to. You need to do GMU(Basic Military training) before you got a chance to apply for it though so start by applying for that. It takes 3 years to finish the studies IF you are accepted into the pilot program. You will only get a couple of chances to apply for it, once you are past 23 your are deemed too old to start to study for it, transport planes and choppers is an alternative though.

    More info:
    http://www.forsvarsmakten.se/sv/Jobb...d/Stridspilot/

    Need to register here for updates on recruitments.
    http://rekryteringskontoret.forsvarsmakten.se/

    As far as your friend goes, sounds like he's trying to hold you down a bit, not uncommon among teenagers, take a break and hang out a bit less with him for a period of time if you want to, wouldn't break off the friendship completely though.
    Last edited by Jackmoves; 2012-12-26 at 02:08 PM.
    The nerve is called the "nerve of awareness". You cant dissect it. Its a current that runs up the center of your spine. I dont know if any of you have sat down, crossed your legs, smoked DMT, and watch what happens... but what happens to me is this big thing goes RRRRRRRRRAAAAAWWW! up my spine and flashes in my brain... well apparently thats whats going to happen if I do this stuff...

  13. #33
    Ask him if something is bothering him. Sometimes people may feel resentment when they're facing problems of their own and their friends keep talking about themselves. Maybe he's feeling insecure that you have such big dreams or facing a huge dilemma in his life. Sometimes we just need someone to listen to our problems in order to figure out a solution.

    If that doesn't work then just give each other some space to grow as young adults. But keep in contact, you'd be surprised how much people can change in just a few short years.

  14. #34
    Quote Originally Posted by mittacc View Post
    1: Yes ofcourse i made it bold with capital letters. He just said that i was going to join the airforce just to get control over a jet and start attacking my own capital...
    It was the second friend's dad we talked about, not the one i think acts respectless. I said ''yeah, that's not good. I did almost need surgery with my hand, lucky that i didn't have to'' to empathize that surgery was a really negative thing and that i'm grateful that i didn't have to do it, it is called to be able to relate to the thing. The first friend then said ''yeah, well this is the leg'' as if my hand wasn't the same thing.
    Your response, in the bold, with both the exclamation and question mark as well as your choice of words, is a verbally violent response that shows a lack of control over your emotions, and a case of hot-headedness. Again, I don't think it's far out of the ordinary for a teen in your situation. Merely that your friend might have a point; that you are (at the moment) indeed violent. Please note that 'violent' and 'prone to hit people for no reason other than venting your anger' aren't quite the same thing.

    The second point: It really doesn't matter whether it was his father or that of the third friend. What matters is that, in that instance, you put your own story on the forefront as a show of sympathy, rather than merely showing sympathy. You basically hijacked their story. Of course you didn't do this intentionally, or even consciously, but the (subconscious) desire to put yourself on the forefront did show. Your response to their 'yeah, will, this is the leg...' was: 'As if my hand wasn't important! As if getting disabled at seventeen isn't important! Rawr!'
    You see, your hand and the father's leg... Weren't related at all. The only commonality was that there were broken bones. But you are not the friend, so it's not about you or your father, and you ran no risk of permanent damage since your hand could be fixed without any steel implements being put to work. The conclusion is that you (understandably) analyze your words as helpful and sympathetic, while, in truth, they weren't.

    But don't feel too bad about all of this. I think everyone on this board would be a hypocrite if they were to express that they hadn't at some point behaved exactly as you did. It's something we (humans) do, and grow out of once we realize what it is we're doing.

  15. #35
    Brewmaster mittacc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stir View Post
    Your response, in the bold, with both the exclamation and question mark as well as your choice of words, is a verbally violent response that shows a lack of control over your emotions, and a case of hot-headedness. Again, I don't think it's far out of the ordinary for a teen in your situation. Merely that your friend might have a point; that you are (at the moment) indeed violent. Please note that 'violent' and 'prone to hit people for no reason other than venting your anger' aren't quite the same thing.

    The second point: It really doesn't matter whether it was his father or that of the third friend. What matters is that, in that instance, you put your own story on the forefront as a show of sympathy, rather than merely showing sympathy. You basically hijacked their story. Of course you didn't do this intentionally, or even consciously, but the (subconscious) desire to put yourself on the forefront did show. Your response to their 'yeah, will, this is the leg...' was: 'As if my hand wasn't important! As if getting disabled at seventeen isn't important! Rawr!'
    You see, your hand and the father's leg... Weren't related at all. The only commonality was that there were broken bones. But you are not the friend, so it's not about you or your father, and you ran no risk of permanent damage since your hand could be fixed without any steel implements being put to work. The conclusion is that you (understandably) analyze your words as helpful and sympathetic, while, in truth, they weren't.

    But don't feel too bad about all of this. I think everyone on this board would be a hypocrite if they were to express that they hadn't at some point behaved exactly as you did. It's something we (humans) do, and grow out of once we realize what it is we're doing.
    I will repeat myself.

    I brought up my hand to be able to show sympathy, if i can relate to said event i do probably have a easier time understanding it? ''i'm so grateful that i didn't need to have surgery'' isn't that a way to show sympathy for his dad? And the friend in question just tossed it away with ''well, we're talking about the leg here'' and he did not mean that i interrupted them or something, he meant that the leg is worse on a man in his 50's than the hand of a 16 year old, they are just as bad damnit!

    Ever heard the saying ''The drop that make the cup runneth over'' ? This is one of those moments since this isn't the first time he just pisses at my problems.

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