Thread: Is it Cheating?

Page 8 of 8 FirstFirst ...
6
7
8
  1. #141
    Quote Originally Posted by Seegtease View Post
    Not everybody who isn't okay with an "open relationship" is a "puritan." It's quite natural for people to like our partners to be faithful to us emotionally and physically. The fact that you don't seem to is because you are the different one. The fact that you phrased it "two girls ended up exchanging a kiss" tells me you don't understand the gravity of the behavior. She's just as interested in men as she is in women. She draws no distinction. She could have done the same thing with a guy.

    The only objective way to look at this for some people who do not grasp the concept of pansexual (or bisexual) is to imagine she was kissing a guy instead of a girl. Imagine it was a guy, and ask yourself if he should be hurt? Then we pile on the fact that she told him it would NOT be okay if he kissed another girl. Yes, she thinks it's okay for her to do it, but not okay for him to do it.

    This is not okay.
    This exactly.

    You're right, I don't own her, but we both agreed upon something when we entered a relationship together, and that was to be faithful. Like I said before, If you are the type to want to fling around, a relationship isn't for you imo.

    If she wants that type of stuff, then by all means, leave. I'm not going to stop her, because she obviously does not want what I want, and it'll cause more problems, but she has told me time and time again that she loves me more than anything. I'm the first guy, out of 20+ guys/gals that she can honestly say she loves/loved. I'm her everything, world etc etc. If I acted like I OWNED her, I wouldn't let it happen, I would baby her in terms of her life, and I don't.

    also, to everyone nagging at the idea of pansexual, it just means she looks past gender, and loves the person for who they are, not for their gender, it's not a copout.

  2. #142
    Quote Originally Posted by Stormtrooperz View Post
    This exactly.

    You're right, I don't own her, but we both agreed upon something when we entered a relationship together, and that was to be faithful. Like I said before, If you are the type to want to fling around, a relationship isn't for you imo.

    If she wants that type of stuff, then by all means, leave. I'm not going to stop her, because she obviously does not want what I want, and it'll cause more problems, but she has told me time and time again that she loves me more than anything. I'm the first guy, out of 20+ guys/gals that she can honestly say she loves/loved. I'm her everything, world etc etc. If I acted like I OWNED her, I wouldn't let it happen, I would baby her in terms of her life, and I don't.

    also, to everyone nagging at the idea of pansexual, it just means she looks past gender, and loves the person for who they are, not for their gender, it's not a copout.
    Yeah. Basically just make sure she wants the same kind of relationship as you. You want a closed, exclusive relationship. You know she doesn't want you to do the same with other girls, but believes it to be okay when she does.

    Either she wants it exclusive or she doesn't. She doesn't get to pick half and half in a way that favors her freedom and your limitations. Maybe she's not yet mature enough for a serious monogamous relationship.

  3. #143
    Mechagnome Fernling306's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    United States
    Posts
    507
    Considering her sexual orientation more than anything else, I would say she absolutely cheated.

  4. #144
    Scarab Lord breadisfunny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    wisconsin
    Posts
    4,326
    Quote Originally Posted by Stormtrooperz View Post
    So, here's the scenario. My girlfriend, her friend and I are all sitting in the back of this car. My best friend and another friend are sitting up front, we are all drinking, having a good time. The girls are GONE, and i step out for a bit to get some fresh air. I'm gone for...3 minutes? I come back, I find out my girlfriend made out with her friend, after her friend kissed her. My friends up front swear it was for a good minute, it wasn't a peck, it wasn't that she was in shock, she seemed to go with it, for a good solid minute.

    Things to consider:

    1. She is a pansexual (my girlfriend).
    2. Anyone guy who comes in here saying I should stop worrying because it's hot, stop. I don't care, simply because it's a stupid stereotype to put on girls.
    3. When I asked her if it was then okay to make out with a straight girl-friend of mine, she said no it's not okay, why? Because she's straight and so am I.
    i dont see this as cheating.

  5. #145
    Pandaren Monk Mukki's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    ANC! ANC! ANC!
    Posts
    1,912
    Quote Originally Posted by Stormtrooperz View Post
    Lol no, long story short all of our places to drink were out of order, but dammit we wanted to get drunk so that wasn't going to stop us, and it was freezing outside.

    Also, she DOESN'T consider it cheating because it was her best friend. I was not okay with that response, to me it doesn't matter.
    Honestly, from what I'm hearing it sounds like she's trying to impose a double standard on you with pitiful excuses to keep you from essentially doing the same thing. Why can't you make out with a girl who happens to be your 'best friend' if it's okay for her using that justification? Being straight has nothing to do with it, she's tri/bi/pansexual or whatever, so making out with a girl whether her best friend or not, is still cheating.

    Judge your lady by her actions, not her words, she's trying to get you caught up with her doubletalk and straight up man, you're being disrespected.

    ---------- Post added 2012-12-29 at 08:10 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Stormtrooperz View Post
    If she wants that type of stuff, then by all means, leave. I'm not going to stop her, because she obviously does not want what I want, and it'll cause more problems, but she has told me time and time again that she loves me more than anything. I'm the first guy, out of 20+ guys/gals that she can honestly say she loves/loved. I'm her everything, world etc etc. If I acted like I OWNED her, I wouldn't let it happen, I would baby her in terms of her life, and I don't.
    As I said, judge her by her actions, not her words. People will oftentimes say one thing and do another. Would you feel better if she was telling you how much she loved you while making out with another dude?

    also, to everyone nagging at the idea of pansexual, it just means she looks past gender, and loves the person for who they are, not for their gender, it's not a copout.
    Personally, just seems like a 'hip' way to say bisexual. Yes, I'm aware bi means 2, so transgenders may not be covered, but I never imagined that was a problem for bisexual people, so just another unnecessary label imo.

  6. #146
    Quote Originally Posted by Mukki View Post
    Honestly, from what I'm hearing it sounds like she's trying to impose a double standard on you with pitiful excuses to keep you from essentially doing the same thing. Why can't you make out with a girl who happens to be your 'best friend' if it's okay for her using that justification? Being straight has nothing to do with it, she's tri/bi/pansexual or whatever, so making out with a girl whether her best friend or not, is still cheating.

    Judge your lady by her actions, not her words, she's trying to get you caught up with her doubletalk and straight up man, you're being disrespected.

    ---------- Post added 2012-12-29 at 08:10 PM ----------



    As I said, judge her by her actions, not her words. People will oftentimes say one thing and do another. Would you feel better if she was telling you how much she loved you while making out with another dude?



    Personally, just seems like a 'hip' way to say bisexual. Yes, I'm aware bi means 2, so transgenders may not be covered, but I never imagined that was a problem for bisexual people, so just another unnecessary label imo.
    well the difference is that bi-sexuals are attracted to both males and females, while pansexuals are not really attracted to genders, but to people as a whole, its like they look past the physicalness of a person, its not about attractiveness of the body but of the soul.

  7. #147
    Yep cheating, shes making excuses, make out with your best guy friend and see if she gets pissy.

  8. #148
    Quote Originally Posted by Amnasty View Post
    Yep cheating, shes making excuses, make out with your best guy friend and see if she gets pissy.
    but hes not attracted to guys.

  9. #149
    I would vote yes. Judging by your fretting over it and the necessity to ask this question, it's definitely worth discussing either way.

  10. #150
    Scarab Lord Maxilian's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Dominican Republic
    Posts
    4,889
    Quote Originally Posted by Stormtrooperz View Post
    Lol no, long story short all of our places to drink were out of order, but dammit we wanted to get drunk so that wasn't going to stop us, and it was freezing outside.

    Also, she DOESN'T consider it cheating because it was her best friend. I was not okay with that response, to me it doesn't matter.
    Well you answered yourself..., You were not ok with her answer nor with her action, so just tell her to never do that again, that you didn't liked it, maybe it will be ok if she it were a game but even if it were a game she should have tell you...

  11. #151
    Quote Originally Posted by Stormtrooperz View Post
    sitting in the back of this car. My best friend and another friend are sitting up front, we are all drinking, having a good time.
    I scanned the first few pages, and no one had a comment on this?

    Anyways if you have to ask, then it's definitely cheating.

  12. #152
    Depends on her intentions. To me it sounds just a drunken experimental make out with a close person of the same gender.

  13. #153
    Quote Originally Posted by RICH1471 View Post
    Yes it is cheating, give her a little shit for it, make her feel guilty for a while then forgive her. It's only kissing, but make sure she knows you wont accept it a second time.
    Totally agree with this post. Do exactly as he says, make fer feel the guilt for a while and forgive her... but let her know, in a clear way that you won't forgive her a second time.

  14. #154
    cheating. Girls like that are the reason girls like me get called fence sitters and such. If you're bi or pan-sexual, that's fine. That doesn't mean you get to do what you want when you want with who you want with no consequences, that just makes you greedy.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •