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  1. #1

    Ways to hide being drunk at work?

    I want to start drinking whiskey in the car in the morning before work to make my day more tolerable. I need some suggestions of how to hide it. I'm very good at acting sober while drunk so that's not an issue, it's mostly the smell I'm worried about. If I use mouth wash in the car and then chew gum while I'm working will that be enough to cover up the scent of alcohol?

    EDIT: I work at a minimum wage job selling donuts.... so it's not like I'm ruining my career or anything.
    Last edited by xtiiina; 2013-01-02 at 01:11 AM.

  2. #2
    I am Murloc! Garnier Fructis's Avatar
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    You only think you're good at acting sober while driving. Please don't run me over.
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  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Garnier Fructis View Post
    You only think you're good at acting sober while driving. Please don't run me over.
    he's drinking it before he gets out of the car when he's already at work i assume by his wording
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  4. #4
    Brewmaster Gotai's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by roflwaffle View Post
    he's drinking it before he gets out of the car when he's already at work i assume by his wording
    But by his wording it might also seem like he'll still be intoxicated when he goes back home.

    OT - For the smell, bring deodorant and probably a gum or so. And I doubt you can really act sober while drunk - however you might think you do.

  5. #5
    really get a different job if you`re resorting to things like this to make it bearable
    “The only thing that really worried me was the ether. There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge. And I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon. Probably at the next gas station.”

  6. #6
    My suggestion: Get a new job or find a better solution than drinking.

    There is a good chance that sooner or later, you'll get caught. Once that happens, good luck getting a job that pays more than minimum wage.

  7. #7
    Won't work on the long term, best thing that can happen if you get fired and cannot get unemployment.
    Or depending on your job you screw up getting someone else maimed.

  8. #8
    http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-tips-d...while-at-work/

    Read this last night, tried it that same night at work. Works like a charm.

  9. #9
    Pandaren Monk Yosef1015's Avatar
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    good way to hide the scent of booze at work? dont drink booze at work

  10. #10
    Er... Coffee and Cigarettes. They make your breath smell so people won't want to be close to your face...

    Short story time:

    We had a guy where I work that would drink gin throughout the entire day. Obviously no one knew this though. Apparently he would drink a fifth or so within his 8 hour shift. He was an older gentleman, around 70 or so. Always really friendly. I was the guys boss for 2 years before he got caught. When he was given a breathalyzer he blew three times the legal limit. He seemed stone cold sober, no slurring of words, quick responses etc. This guy was a "pro."
    I sat alone in the dark one night, tuning in by remote.
    I found a preacher who spoke of the light, but there was Brimstone in his throat.
    He'd show me the way, according to him, in return for my personal check.
    I flipped my channel back to CNN and lit another cigarette.

  11. #11
    Epic!
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    I've found that the best way, and to great success I might add, is to be sober in order to not act drunk at work. I realize this isn't what you asked for, but it is a suggestion.

    Other suggestions more in line for what you asked for involve either changing the whiskey to something that doesn't smell as much (like vodka). If it must be whiskey, stop showering and don't change your clothes, and your body odor will surely out-smell the whiskey. As a bonus, people won't get too close to you and risk catching that whiskey breath you're trying to hide. The added benefits of this strategy does have equal draw backs. If your boss gets a whiff of both your body odor and the whiskey breath, he might conclude something that isn't necessarily true, albeit probably isn't that far off.
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  12. #12
    Why don't you try heroin? Doesn't smell at all and is far more effective.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kayhos View Post
    every video game has gamey aspects to it

  13. #13
    Don't fucking drink when you got work the next day, retard.

    Infracted
    Last edited by Dacien; 2013-01-02 at 12:03 AM.

  14. #14
    have some food after, i recommend double-cheeseburger from McD + can of coke

    just make sure you belch it all out before you go in

    works for me, after a night-out with heavy drinking anyway

    ---------- Post added 2013-01-01 at 11:23 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by JimmyHellfire View Post
    Why don't you try heroin? Doesn't smell at all and is far more effective.
    nah, he'd just keep nodding out ;p

  15. #15
    This won't end well for you.

  16. #16
    Quote Originally Posted by Chunkyman View Post
    Don't fucking drink when you got work the next day, retard.
    Read his post.

  17. #17
    I am Murloc! Airwaves's Avatar
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    Is this guy for real?

    This is just a great way to get your ass sued if you fuck up something bad. If its that bad start looking for another job. The feeling that your are looking for different work should be enough to get you though the day.
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  18. #18
    #1 tip: Don't be drunk at work.

  19. #19
    I am Murloc! Garnier Fructis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by roflwaffle View Post
    he's drinking it before he gets out of the car when he's already at work i assume by his wording
    Oh, I see. I still think it's a tad ambiguous, but if you're just drinking it in the car after you're done driving that's not as bad.
    Quote Originally Posted by Orlong View Post
    Mobius strip still has 2 sides. you can pinch 2 fingers on both sides of the ribbon at the same spot
    Quote Originally Posted by auBerg View Post
    You are a certified crackpot that is subservient to the manipulators of science who are dreaming to control knowledge.

  20. #20
    You need help. You're either an alcoholic or you need a new job.

    Bergtau's Law: As an online discussion grows longer, the probability that somebody will mention Godwin's Law approaches 1.
    Hitler wasn't all bad, I mean, he DID kill Hitler.
    An accident is something that you did not mean to do at all. A mistake is something that you regret doing.

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