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  1. #1

    Legal(ish) advice..

    Not really one to post random things.. but I see people making threads all the time about their lives.. so I figure I'll give it a shot..

    so the story: My girlfriend was arrested for assaulting me, during an argument. (she had called the police after) Apparently in Canada, police have to arrest someone in a case of domestic. Whether someone wants them too or not. So anyways.. she was told if she pleads guilty, she would have to go to anger management, but neither of us think that's needed and Duty Counsel told her she should take it to Trial.

    I'm assuming, if she takes it to trial, they'll need me to go give my statement and such. (Which I was tricked into by detectives.. I feel pretty stupid about that, as I was informed I had no choice but to give a statement)

    I'm just trying to get a basic guide line of what will be the out come, when I don't go to court? if it's needed. I'm in Canada, it'd be my first offense.
    I really think jail time would be over re-acting for this. But I'm sure some others may have more experience with the legal system than me.

    I read some things on google saying, they'd most likely just toss out the case..

  2. #2
    Moderator Kasierith's Avatar
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    This is really more of a question for legal council than a forum; there are a few forums focusing on legal advice that are staffed by lawyers, they might be able to give you more advice.

    Apart from that... I don't know Canada's laws involving this type of incident, and for future reference don't let detectives back you into a corner because that limits your future options, but if neither you nor her are interested in pressing charges or anything of the sort, that's hopefully a good sign that things will turn out well for you.
    “…the whole trouble lies here. In words, words. Each one of us has within him a whole world of things, each man of us his own special world. And how can we ever come to an understanding if I put in the words I utter the sense and value of things as I see them; while you who listen to me must inevitably translate them according to the conception of things each one of you has within himself. We think we understand each other, but we never really do.”
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  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Kasierith View Post
    This is really more of a question for legal council than a forum; there are a few forums focusing on legal advice that are staffed by lawyers, they might be able to give you more advice.

    Apart from that... I don't know Canada's laws involving this type of incident, and for future reference don't let detectives back you into a corner because that limits your future options, but if neither you nor her are interested in pressing charges or anything of the sort, that's hopefully a good sign that things will turn out well for you.
    Thanks man, yeah I learned from this. Police told me I had no choice but to give the statement.. and yet detectives told her I didn't have too. It was my first time going through something like this.

    Would you be able to direct me to a forum? (is it free?)

  4. #4
    High Overlord Dsfunctional's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hiitsdj View Post
    Thanks man, yeah I learned from this. Police told me I had no choice but to give the statement.. and yet detectives told her I didn't have too. It was my first time going through something like this.

    Would you be able to direct me to a forum? (is it free?)
    When dealing with detectives, keep your mouth shut. They'll do anything to make you say, what they need to hear.

    I'm Canadian, been there done that. Don't worry, your not going to jail. If your really worried about the whole situation, hire some legal aid.

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Dsfunctional View Post
    When dealing with detectives, keep your mouth shut. They'll do anything to make you say, what they need to hear.

    I'm Canadian, been there done that. Don't worry, your not going to jail. If your really worried about the whole situation, hire some legal aid.
    That's what I'll probably do. I'm not going into court and giving my statement or anything over some stupid thing that I've requested many times to get dropped.
    Good to hear someone say that though, really don't wanna go to jail over this. :P I'll deal with bail, or whatever if I really must.

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Hiitsdj View Post
    That's what I'll probably do. I'm not going into court and giving my statement or anything over some stupid thing that I've requested many times to get dropped.
    Good to hear someone say that though, really don't wanna go to jail over this. :P I'll deal with bail, or whatever if I really must.
    Yeah find legal advice, even just to talk to someone is usually free. Problem isn't that you're not pressing charges, the Crown can and this case seems to be following through on it.
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  7. #7
    Mechagnome
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hiitsdj View Post
    Not really one to post random things.. but I see people making threads all the time about their lives.. so I figure I'll give it a shot..

    so the story: My girlfriend was arrested for assaulting me, during an argument. (she had called the police after) Apparently in Canada, police have to arrest someone in a case of domestic. Whether someone wants them too or not. So anyways.. she was told if she pleads guilty, she would have to go to anger management, but neither of us think that's needed and Duty Counsel told her she should take it to Trial.

    I'm assuming, if she takes it to trial, they'll need me to go give my statement and such. (Which I was tricked into by detectives.. I feel pretty stupid about that, as I was informed I had no choice but to give a statement)

    I'm just trying to get a basic guide line of what will be the out come, when I don't go to court? if it's needed. I'm in Canada, it'd be my first offense.
    I really think jail time would be over re-acting for this. But I'm sure some others may have more experience with the legal system than me.

    I read some things on google saying, they'd most likely just toss out the case..

    Please don,t post false informations or BULLSHIT on those forums.

    First if she actually DID call the police...They'd arrested YOU. In Canada the law is in favor of the woman when it comes to domestic violence. The man is GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN INNOCENT so it is absolutely impossible that they arrested her without YOU pressing charges.

    If you DID. you can just drop you complaint and everything will go away.

    FAIL TROLL ATTEMPT IS FAIL.....

  8. #8
    Should of taken the anger management course, what would it of been? a 1 day course or a few hours each week for x amount of weeks? now you debating about not showing up to a trail, which could land you in the shit,

    from a uk pov that lands you a fine atleast, maybe jail time
    over your way, if your summoned to court and don't turn up isn't there a "bounty hunter" or something?

    Best thing you can go do is, go to the police station, say you want the charges dropped and hope to god they dont charge you with wasting their time

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by Rotted View Post
    Should of taken the anger management course, what would it of been? a 1 day course or a few hours each week for x amount of weeks? now you debating about not showing up to a trail, which could land you in the shit,

    from a uk pov that lands you a fine atleast, maybe jail time
    over your way, if your summoned to court and don't turn up isn't there a "bounty hunter" or something?

    Best thing you can go do is, go to the police station, say you want the charges dropped and hope to god they dont charge you with wasting their time
    Except then she has an assault charge on her criminal record.
    "Bah-weep-graaaaagnah wheep nini bong!"
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    Quote Originally Posted by Helden View Post
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  10. #10
    Mechagnome BigpapaBeef's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Somebodyelse View Post
    Please don,t post false informations or BULLSHIT on those forums.

    First if she actually DID call the police...They'd arrested YOU. In Canada the law is in favor of the woman when it comes to domestic violence. The man is GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN INNOCENT so it is absolutely impossible that they arrested her without YOU pressing charges.

    If you DID. you can just drop you complaint and everything will go away.

    FAIL TROLL ATTEMPT IS FAIL.....
    i have no words. isnt there school today?

  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by Somebodyelse View Post
    Please don,t post false informations or BULLSHIT on those forums.

    First if she actually DID call the police...They'd arrested YOU. In Canada the law is in favor of the woman when it comes to domestic violence. The man is GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN INNOCENT so it is absolutely impossible that they arrested her without YOU pressing charges.

    If you DID. you can just drop you complaint and everything will go away.

    FAIL TROLL ATTEMPT IS FAIL.....
    Actually, I had marks on me (which is FULLY the reason I wasn't charged.. police made that quite clear to us both)

    and like I said, apparently when it comes to domestic the police have no choice but to charge someone in Ontario at least, if not Canada. Which neither of us knew at the time. I didn't press any charges, and I've asked for it to be dropped.

    Quote Originally Posted by bitterbrew View Post
    i have no words. isnt there school today?
    I had a feeling it was a troll post, but I could see someones point of view for thinking that at the same time.

  12. #12
    Out of curiosity, why did she call the police if you didn't want to press charges?

  13. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by Togarox View Post
    Out of curiosity, why did she call the police if you didn't want to press charges?
    I'm not going to lie, I do have a violent past from before her. She said she was just scared because I was yelling. I can't really blame her for that, but at the time, she didn't know someone had to be charged.

  14. #14
    I don't think you need to be too worried. But you need to show up and explain how you want charges drop etc, don't ignore the court date.

    If it's a compulsory prosecution, and it's nothing serious, you'll both be fine. They just don't want the police to use too much discretion and let actual abuse cases go undetected. That's probably why her counsel adviced going to court.

  15. #15
    Quote Originally Posted by Togarox View Post
    Out of curiosity, why did she call the police if you didn't want to press charges?
    people do stupid things in the heat of the moment?
    I feel something so right doing the wrong thing,I feel something so wrong doing the right thing,I could lie, coudn't I, could lie,Everything that kills me makes me feel alive.

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  16. #16
    Immortal Sigma's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hiitsdj View Post
    My girlfriend was arrested for assaulting me, during an argument. (she had called the police after)
    I have an absolute zero tolerance for physical any abuse in a relationship. If she hit you once it is most likely that she will hit you again. It sounded serious enough for her to call the police and try and get you into trouble. End the replationship NOW, and let the charges stand. If she gets away with it once with you, in the future it will get worse, either for you or someone else.

  17. #17
    Quote Originally Posted by Somebodyelse View Post
    Please don,t post false informations or BULLSHIT on those forums.

    First if she actually DID call the police...They'd arrested YOU. In Canada the law is in favor of the woman when it comes to domestic violence. The man is GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN INNOCENT so it is absolutely impossible that they arrested her without YOU pressing charges.

    If you DID. you can just drop you complaint and everything will go away.

    FAIL TROLL ATTEMPT IS FAIL.....
    I got stabbed by my ex twice and then she called the cops and she's the one that got arrested, so how about you just shut the fuck up and take your own bullshit elsewhere

    Anyway.........in most places, domestic violence is not person 1 charging person 2, it is the state charging the aggressor, which means neither of you has a choice on whether or not to pursue it
    Quote Originally Posted by kasath
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  18. #18
    Quote Originally Posted by Siggma View Post
    I have an absolute zero tolerance for physical any abuse in a relationship. If she hit you once it is most likely that she will hit you again. It sounded serious enough for her to call the police and try and get you into trouble. End the replationship NOW, and let the charges stand. If she gets away with it once with you, in the future it will get worse, either for you or someone else.
    That is true, although it depends on how serious the assault was, although considering it left marks i guess it was pretty serious so yeah, I would likely get out of it to be fairly honest.
    Never been in such situation so I have no idea how it would unfold, but honestly either option is a tad nasty...
    She might need those anger management classes, even if just to let her know that "it isnt ok", albeit it would likely destroy your relationship, on the other side if you dont it can be perceived as "its ok to hit me", depends on how you handle it...

    personally i would do the same as Siggma, and get away from her.

    ---------- Post added 2013-01-04 at 08:34 PM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Pfeff View Post
    I got stabbed by my ex twice and then she called the cops and she's the one that got arrested, so how about you just shut the fuck up and take your own bullshit elsewhere

    Anyway.........in most places, domestic violence is not person 1 charging person 2, it is the state charging the aggressor, which means neither of you has a choice on whether or not to pursue it
    Oooh, she sounds like a real psycho, i love psycho girls, whats her number?

  19. #19
    This might help:

    http://criminallawyerintoronto.blogs...n-ontario.html

    Although this blog basically just echoes what has already been said here (and what you heard on your own from the pigs in Toronto) - the Crown has a 0 tolerance policy for domestics, and will prosecute it regardless of the wishes of the parties to drop it.

  20. #20
    If you (or her) just don't show up to court you'll have a lot more problems then just this domestic issue. You should just talk to the prosecutor to either have

    1) she pleads guilty in exchange for anger counselling which if completed wipes away any 'felony' charges from her record so it doesn't show up to potential employers/she can travel to the US

    2) you both enroll into relationship counselling, in exchange for the charges to get dropped.

    3) go to trial where they'll show a picture of any marks she left on you + your testimony and she'll be found guilty. she wont go to jail (in Canada you wont for a minor first offence) but will get mandatory counselling and a criminal record.


    She should just own up to her acts and get on with it. and honestly from your past (what you wrote) and what she did...you might want to reconsider your relationship....and both seek anger counselling.

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