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  1. #1

    [BIO] Gimain StoneFist

    Name: Gimain StoneFist
    Age: 62
    Race: Iron Forge Dwarf
    Gender: Male
    Class: Warrior

    Languages: Common and Dwarven

    Faction: Iron Forge (Alliance)

    Personality: As like any dwarf Gimain loves his alcohol, the more the merrier. Doesn't anger quickly but when he does he has a sharp tongue and tells everything as it is. Gimain is very suspicious of any race outside the iron forge dwarfs so earning his trust his hard, and especially hard if said person was elves and draenei. But once you befriend Gimain he is kind and generous to those that hold true to him. He is a protector of the weak, innocent or even if his friends are in danger. He can be very stubborn when he wants to be, if he sets his mind to something there is no changing it until he has fulfilled it.

    Likes: Gimain loves his alcohol as mentioned before, he does like to gamble a bit, and he is very fond of the shorter race or also known as gnomes. He loves spending time in the forge creating weapons and if not that then its training with his trusty axe and shield.

    Dislikes: Gimain dislikes people who use magic he considers it a trick more than anything else.

    Appearance: : Gimain is a little bit taller than most dwarfs coming in at 4'14 and weighting at 100kg’s. He has long black hair just to his shoulders while he has a full beard like any other respected dwarf does, he is muscular due to been a dwarf and smithing and training. He was dark eyes and a scar just above his left eye from practicing with friends. You will usually find him wearing full plate mail that is shining silver, but no helmet or head piece, on his waist u will see his axe and on his back you will find his shield which is engraved with a StoneFist on it, the family crest.

    Strengths: Gimain’s strength lies in his ability to use a shield and axe with ease. He is a master at forging weapons, there is nothing he can’t craft for you.

    Weaknesses: Because Gimain is a dwarf and wears full plate he is rather slow on the battlefield. Sometimes because he is so stubborn it can get the best of him at times as he doesn't see to clearly. Because he lashes out when he’s angry people do tend to stay away from him and because he is so suspicious it’s hard for him to trust anyone or befriend them.

    History: Gimain lived in Iron forge all his life, he has no siblings a father Dwalin and his mother Thon. Dwalin is a weapon smith at Iron Forge and has his own forge to do all his smithing. Gimain would spend his days training with an axe and a shield with his friends or on training dummies. He has got a few scares from training with his friends but it’s all part of the experience, his most noticeable scare is on his face, just above his eye is a long cut which he got because he wasn't concentrating during training and his friend hit him with a solid blow above his eye, but he took it lightly as it was his own fault, he could have avoided it.

    Gimain also likes a good drink and even drinking contests with friends or even strangers, all in the name of fun and friendship.

    When Gimain got to the age of 35 Dwalin took him in as his apprentice weapon smith which is the family tradition. Gimain remained under Dwalin’s apprenticeship for 20 years, which he had mastered the craft of weapon smithing and it was Dwalin’s idea to send Gimain to Gold Shire to open up his own forge and work his way into opening a forge in the Dwarven district in storm wind.

    Gimain enjoyed the challenge of starting his own forge in Gold Shire as to the residence he was a nobody so he had to make a name and reputation for himself, 3 years later he made his forge a bit bigger as people saw how good his craft was and his weapons were getting more in demand. Gimain’s main goal was to get into the Dwarven district open a forge for himself and then start teaching his craft to those that were willing to learn it and work hard.
    Last edited by creedhunter; 2013-01-22 at 06:21 AM.

  2. #2
    The Patient
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    I liked the story. I think it has allot of potential; but I noticed a couple of things that you might want to take a look over.

    Firstly I noticed quiet a few silly little grammatical errors such as the use of the letter "u" instead of the word "you" which is from what I understand to be a big no-no! I noticed you also never named Gimain's parents names or if he had any siblings or not.
    Another little thing I noticed was that you mentioned Gimain's father was rather torn up or depressed after not being able to defend the king in the previous war, but shortly after said that everything had gone back to being normal and he was off on an adventure with the explorer's league like nothing had happened.Maybe you could go into a little bit more detail on what happened when Gimain's father defended or attempted to defend the king. Why was the king killed and not Gimain's father? Was he hiding in terror? Were there other guards accompanying the king? If not why weren't there more guards with the king? How was the king killed?

    Edit: Noticed I spellt Gimain wrong and wrote it as Grimain! xD

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Notamonk View Post
    I liked the story. I think it has allot of potential; but I noticed a couple of things that you might want to take a look over.

    Firstly I noticed quiet a few silly little grammatical errors such as the use of the letter "u" instead of the word "you" which is from what I understand to be a big no-no! I noticed you also never named Gimain's parents names or if he had any siblings or not.
    Another little thing I noticed was that you mentioned Gimain's father was rather torn up or depressed after not being able to defend the king in the previous war, but shortly after said that everything had gone back to being normal and he was off on an adventure with the explorer's league like nothing had happened.Maybe you could go into a little bit more detail on what happened when Gimain's father defended or attempted to defend the king. Why was the king killed and not Gimain's father? Was he hiding in terror? Were there other guards accompanying the king? If not why weren't there more guards with the king? How was the king killed?

    Edit: Noticed I spellt Gimain wrong and wrote it as Grimain! xD
    haha after re reading it know i see, sorry about that i will correct it and thank u for your input

  4. #4
    The Patient
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    Not a problem!!! Make sure to try and use proper grammar and punctuation when you're retyping anything out! It makes me cringe when people say "u" in place of the word "you" instead. lol

  5. #5
    Okay so i have updated his BIO, please read and tell me what you think about it.

  6. #6
    Mechagnome Mengucekli's Avatar
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    Hail to the fellow dwarven warrior Nice bio mate, see you around in RPs

  7. #7
    Role-player Khorianas's Avatar
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    Hi there and welcome to the Rp Forums.

    The characteristics are fine,

    Sadly I have to point out some major issues in the history.

    It is forbidden to have a tie to a major Lore Character, so being the personal Guard of Madoran Bronzebeard is not possible, especially not if you would be more of less responsible in a way or another for his death, this also counts for your characters father.

    Also Madoran survived the War of the Three Hammers, so this story can't have transpired at all. You could replace the king with an important noble/councilmember/general or the likes, but there is another problem:

    The venerable age for a dwarf is 250 and that is an age rarely reached by an adventurer. The maximum lifespan can be 450, but that includes lives prolonged by Holy Light users/ divine magic, and I would guess that at an age past 250 (So more than 50 years over reaching old) a dwarf is nor really fit for an adventuring life anymore.

    On this I must admit I had to think for some time, but yes Gimain has to be younger. Maybe just tell us about his fathers life more shortly and focus on a younger Gimain.
    Last edited by Khorianas; 2013-01-15 at 08:58 AM.

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Khorianas View Post
    Hi there and welcome to the Rp Forums.

    The characteristics are fine,

    Sadly I have to point out some major issues in the history.

    It is forbidden to have a tie to a major Lore Character, so being the personal Guard of Madoran Bronzebeard is not possible, especially not if you would be more of less responsible in a way or another for his death, this also counts for your characters father.

    Also Madoran survived the War of the Three Hammers, so this story can't have transpired at all. You could replace the king with an important noble/councilmember/general or the likes, but there is another problem:

    The venerable age for a dwarf is 250 and that is an age rarely reached by an adventurer. The maximum lifespan can be 450, but that includes lives prolonged by Holy Light users/ divine magic, and I would guess that at an age past 250 (So more than 50 years over reaching old) a dwarf is nor really fit for an adventuring life anymore.

    On this I must admit I had to think for some time, but yes Gimain has to be younger. Maybe just tell us about his fathers life more shortly and focus on a younger Gimain.
    Thank u very your insight, i will rethink the history a bit and correct it, what's the average age? I had it at 100?
    Sorry while I'm thinking about the age, how do u actually work out a rough age for a race? Because no where did I see that dwarves rarely live to see 450.
    Last edited by creedhunter; 2013-01-15 at 09:24 AM.

  9. #9
    Role-player Khorianas's Avatar
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    Hi creedhunter,

    The WoWPedia Life Span Page is the source for my rambling. It lists Adulthood, Middle Age, Old Age, Venerable and Maximum Lifespan.

    For a dwarf you have Adulthood at 40, Middle Age at 125, Old Age at 188 venerable at 250 and maximum Lifespan at 450.

    To put it into context Adulthood middle and Old age are rather self explicable the venerable age is when someone gets really old. This I personally would still attribute to good health. Human venerable age is 80. But a 80 year old human is not really an adventuring type anymore. the Maximum Lifespan is like a record holder. And it usually means there was some holy magic or divine magic in use, which are able to prolong life. Human max Lifespan is 85-130.
    I think you can get the idea. 290 would be a human equivalent of 90-95 years.

    I hope this is of help.

  10. #10
    Mechagnome Mengucekli's Avatar
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    There is no need to have your character so old. Most of the stuff happens in either the last 30 years or 10.000 years earlier in WoW universe after all, so anything in between is almost useless. You can have a 50 year old dwarf like me and perfectly be content with it anyways.

  11. #11
    haha once again it's been updated and changed XD

  12. #12
    The Patient
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    I think you should really take some time and rewrite this or add a little bit more to it. I'm not very educated as far as lore goes, but the story seems to be missing something. There are lots of holes in the plot and could use some more depth to it.

    In the first paragraph you mentioned that Dwalin crafted weaponry for the local guard of Iron Forge. How did they get picked to craft for the mighty Dwarf kingdom of Ironforge; Dwalin seems to be a regular run of the mill black smith, nothing worthy of crafting weaponry for the army by any means. Did Gimain enjoy black smithing with his father or did he do it because he felt obligated too? Was Dwalin well known for crafting a specific type of weapon? Was Gimain well know for crafting a specific type of weapon?

    In the second paragraph you mentioned that Gimain made lots of friends; what happened to those friends? Did any of the join the Army as Gimain did? Why and who were his friends? How did they meet? I just feel like you could of added a bit more then "Gimain made friends because he didn't have any siblings and didn't want to be lonely. He also trained and sparred with his friends."

    Last point; I don't think its reasonable to say that Gimain was training for 15 years if he was already skilled with his choice of weapon (Axe and Shield), did he train with any other kind of weaponry? Did he train the new recruits after x amount of years? Was he in any previous battles or was the war of the three hammers his first? Did he gain rank through out his experience in the army?


    Just some things I noticed that could be looked over if you want to put more work into this piece!


    Keep up the good work, you'll get it soon enough!

  13. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by Mengucekli View Post
    There is no need to have your character so old. Most of the stuff happens in either the last 30 years or 10.000 years earlier in WoW universe after all, so anything in between is almost useless. You can have a 50 year old dwarf like me and perfectly be content with it anyways.
    The problem with that is lore inconsistencies. If he wants to be in the war of the three hammers, which occurred roughly 300 years ago, he can't be 50. Changing the age like that would require him to rewrite that portion of his biography... which ultimately's going to have to happen anyway since this guy would hardly be fit for any adventure at the age of 350ish.

    Quote Originally Posted by Notamonk View Post
    In the first paragraph you mentioned that Dwalin crafted weaponry for the local guard of Iron Forge. How did they get picked to craft for the mighty Dwarf kingdom of Ironforge; Dwalin seems to be a regular run of the mill black smith, nothing worthy of crafting weaponry for the army by any means. Did Gimain enjoy black smithing with his father or did he do it because he felt obligated too? Was Dwalin well known for crafting a specific type of weapon? Was Gimain well know for crafting a specific type of weapon?
    Armies require many blacksmiths to craft weapons and armor. Having this character make such for local guards is fairly reasonable... though having the elite come in and request stuff is pushing it a bit.

    Ultimately, Creed, I like this bio. This character is interesting and I think he could be a great character for you, but I'd take some time and flesh his story out. If you think something could be expanded, expand on it. Take Monk's post to heart, and try and think some stuff up for the questions he is posing. As well, I'm not sure if english is your first language or not (we do have many people here who don't speak english as their primary language and I mean no offense by this), but try and look over your bio and see if you can't detect any spelling or grammatical inaccuracies (including shorthand). It makes it a lot easier for us to read as well as shows a certain care that we like to see.

    I am impatient to see how this character improves. You can only go up from here!

  14. #14
    Didn't realize how hard it would be to write a character BIO

  15. #15
    It's not hard once you get used to it, and it's very rewarding once you're done. Keep at it mate.

  16. #16
    Mechagnome Mengucekli's Avatar
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    What if he was petrified in a cave in 300 years back in battle, and recovered recently? That would have been awesome

  17. #17
    Haha is that plausible? Sounds like a great idea

  18. #18
    I'd find that unlikely, considering the only ways people could do that would be through amber, and that's a custom of the mantid, whom we only just met, and cryo-sleep, which is sci-fi... Your character would more likely have died.

    True titan creations seem to have a sort of stasis... either that or it's a hibernation and they're made to last, but with the curse of flesh, a regular dwarf I do not think has this capability. There's been no record of such, at least.
    Last edited by The Mister Madgod; 2013-01-16 at 04:40 PM.

  19. #19
    The Patient
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    No no no no no. What is this Solidified in amber nonsense? Here is what you have to do. Gimain goes into battle and is badly wounded. A gnome Engineer and his buddy the Alchemist find him in the battle field about the die, and do the only logical thing to save his life... make him a CYBORG!!!!! DUN DUN DUUUUH! Robo-Gimain returns from the dead to kick some ookin dookers like no other has done before!!!! Half Dwarf half ass kickin robot Gimain returns from the dead to avenge the fallen and wipe out the Dark Iron Dwarfs.


    I think I smell an Oscar. lmao


    Edit: Someone get Micheal Bay on the phone NOW! lol
    Last edited by Notamonk; 2013-01-16 at 04:55 PM. Reason: for le lulz

  20. #20
    Awh, dude... I had hopes for you :<

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