I don't believe in destiny or fate. I'm also a little weird in that I frequently bounce between two states of mind; one is better suited for drawing, the other is better suited for writing. The switches happen usually every few weeks and result in the next few weeks being spent mostly thinking about writing or drawing. They share a link in that what resonates with me and what I draw/write as a result is the same regardless of which state of mind I'm in; thus most of my drawings revolve around BWSD's OCs, and most of my writings are in some way related to BWSD.
It's hard to get overly passionate about either medium specifically when ultimately what I'm passionate about is my OCs and BWSD's concepts/characters/universe (BWSD is Broken Wings, Scattered Dust, the ponyfic' I'm writing). I do enjoy drawing when I can convince myself to not give a crap about how bad I am in comparison to people who've been doing it for years, but those times are exceedingly rare. It's not that I don't care about drawing or writing, just that the skill path I see leading up to where I want to be with them gets longer the longer I look at it, regardless of whether I'm moving forwards or not. Drawing is more my weak point because unlike writing, I can't improve at it simply by thinking about it, which is my natural approach to almost everything. I have to do it.
It also doesn't help that I'm extraordinarily competitive and constantly comparing myself to others, which is not a good trait to have in any creative/artistic field.
Well, in the end I just want people to take responsibility for their own happiness. Out of all the hardships I've seen people go through, a common theme is that they give their responsibility to be happy to someone or something else.
My family has had some trouble in the past, most of it happening all at once. Between parents almost breaking over adultery, up to my sister's drug problem and one of our dogs having cancer of which my parents left me to take care of while they solved their relationship problems, it was a lot. When you get to the point where you're laying next to your sister whose shaking with withdrawals you have some time to think about how people can get into these states, not to omit myself. I placed blame for these things on myself, saying I could of done something to fix it, I've even been told this by other people.
But one thing I've realized from all this? Is that we can only truly be responsible for ourselves. You can give your responsibility of happiness to your wife/husband, to a drug, or to those around you, but in the end, it's still up to you to bring that happiness, not the person you gave that responsibility to. The time I usually call "the decadence" for myself is when I waited for my family around me to make me happy because of all the things that were going on, when they were no position to bring that happiness anyways. If I'd simply realized that and stopped wallowing, I could of tried to help them. It's something I want to do for others now that I see it, but I also know that it's up to the other person to also see this and help themselves, not me.
It's why I fight rather hard against those who say "I'm just not good enough" or "Other people are better anyways", because that is nothing but wallowing, and I know how terrible that is. It doesn't make anyone happy, it doesn't solve anything, and it doesn't bring meaning to a life beyond the acceptance of failure. While we as people are conditioned to "learn to fail", thus breaking our ability to make a choice under the expectation that we'll fail anyways, it shouldn't undermine the purpose someone gives to their life by canceling their ability to choose it, because in the end, each of us are only responsible for our own purpose and joy that we make through religious, self-asserted, or acceptance of and living in spite of the absurdity in life.
Alright, that was a bit melodramatic, but I hope you get my point. This isn't meant to convince you to draw, or of anything you aren't sure of, much like I told Frey. But in the same way I told him, I'd tell you; it does hurt me to see people give up on things because of external motivators, because it's personal to me, in the same way I gave up on myself, and indirectly, those around me. It's our internal motivations that are authentic and what we should follow, no matter the external pressures of events, society, and the world around us, because we can always have control over internal thoughts in spite of external problems, and choose them for our own sake of what we care about.
I can't help but be reminded of Discord when I think of these, because all of his episodes deal directly with this.
Edit: Hmm, I realize this probably a bit late, a bit lengthy. Oh well. lol