Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst
1
2
3
4
LastLast
  1. #41
    Quote Originally Posted by Bryntrollian View Post
    Game or not these are real people with real feelings
    This is so true. We, gamers, sometimes forget that we are playing with real people even if the environment is virtual and act like normally we wouldn't IRL.

  2. #42
    Quote Originally Posted by Frizzlewits View Post
    anyways, it comes down to this.
    WoW is just a game, like any other game you are playing it for the fun. entertainment.
    Sometimes this can't be emphasized enough at the end of a day.
    Anyways I wouldn't put up with that kind of crap. I have witnessed and experienced myself a fair share of drama involving numerous guilds and honestly - fuck 'em.
    Just go somewhere else people like these are easily interchangeable believe it or not.

  3. #43
    What now?...Do a TLDR.

    I don't really get what you are saying, all I understood is that you care about some random girl on the internet way too much.

  4. #44
    Whatever girl is the one deleting you doesn't really sound like she's much of a friend. I've been through stupid drama before in WoW. It's not worth it. Such drama will likely follow the new guild or whatever is going on. Just find a bunch of bros on a different server and move there.

  5. #45
    Brewmaster Sykol's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Alberta
    Posts
    1,272
    Quote Originally Posted by Aqua View Post
    Okay it doesn't surprise you. Your experiences in game with women are bad, but please don't generalize, cases are all individually different and I didn't really see the entire story written there, even if it was lengthy.
    It also doesn't surprise many other people here. Check the responses, even from women. Not all girls cause drama, but making a huge deal out of talking behind people's backs and the little hidden cliques are usually feminine traits. Granted, it was a little difficult to decipher every part of the OP, but most of the negative aspects of his post appeared alongside mention of a "she." Guys can be the cause, too, but it's a lot less common, especially to this degree.

    And just to clarify, my experiences with women in gaming have been positive in general. But I've seen more than one guild completely dissolve into drama and backstabbing solely because of a girl using her higher pitched voice to get what she wants (raid spot, loot, et cetera), or when one or more new girls join the guild and the previously-only-female gets jealous and weird.

  6. #46
    Keyboard Turner
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    Netherlands
    Posts
    9
    I expected drama. This is highschool gibberish. 0/10 wouldn't read again. Also, you hang out with way too many girls. Girls aren't allowed to raid.

  7. #47
    Quote Originally Posted by Sykol View Post
    It also doesn't surprise many other people here. Check the responses, even from women. Not all girls cause drama, but making a huge deal out of talking behind people's backs and the little hidden cliques are usually feminine traits. Granted, it was a little difficult to decipher every part of the OP, but most of the negative aspects of his post appeared alongside mention of a "she." Guys can be the cause, too, but it's a lot less common, especially to this degree.

    And just to clarify, my experiences with women in gaming have been positive in general. But I've seen more than one guild completely dissolve into drama and backstabbing solely because of a girl using her higher pitched voice to get what she wants (raid spot, loot, et cetera), or when one or more new girls join the guild and the previously-only-female gets jealous and weird.
    Totally agree. My guilds record on guys making drama without girls involved: 1
    My guilds record on guys making drama with girls involved: 2
    My guilds record on girls making drama on their own: 10+ (lost count since Wrath of the Lich King and also with only 3 exceptions didn't allow girls in our guild anymore, this was unanymously decided by the guild)

    ---------- Post added 2013-02-01 at 02:29 PM ----------

    I want to add that I totally like girls fine in WoW. Just generally speaking they cause a lot of problems, be it through guys or just themselves. And then you have the issue that most of the girls I had in my guild (as a trial) never passed the trial. Be it due to drama already caused or that they plainly sucked.

    Now again I have met a few select girls that really did hold their own and didn't cause drama. I count 3 (a priest, a hunter and a mage). The girls that were skilled but caused drama 2 priests 1 mage 1 paladin (not caused drama during the trial). This is based on 7 years recruitment. Mind you we are a guild that was in it for progression. Not a social guild. I wouldn't mind that much if we were a social guild. I think girls in WoW generally speaking are ideal for social guilds.
    Last edited by Vaelorian; 2013-02-01 at 01:31 PM.

  8. #48
    Move on, some ppl feed on drama and its kinda obvious who. Dont mind them, just move on and let it go.

  9. #49
    Change realm and guild. There is no reason to go through shit like that for a game

    And btw. Vent is way better than the crappy mumble and teamspeak. If you know how to set up the codecs right. you get 97.9% better sound quality

  10. #50
    Mechagnome Jaojin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    The Cabin
    Posts
    697
    Quote Originally Posted by Cayenne View Post
    I must say , that for a person, who want to avoid drama you seem to run with whispers to awful amount of people... If something bugs you- go straight about it, say what you need/want to say and stop, dont do "whisper marathon" on random countless people cause it will just stir the situation more.
    This is probably some of the best advice given.

    Move to Kilrogg (you said you were gonna do it anyway so that's not really advice I know) but keep in touch with her fiancee. She will either: drift apart, or reconnect through him.

    Also, saying your sorry (even if you don't believe you have done anything to deserve it) can do wonders to change a person's attitude to a point where you can communicate effectively again.
    "And what's the real lesson? Don't leave food in the fridge."
    -Spike Spiegel

  11. #51
    Mechagnome Pum's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Cambridge, UK
    Posts
    633
    Cut and run, bitches be trippin'.
    Quote Originally Posted by tweekzlol View Post
    but then again, The Coon is obviously unbeatable as he will just manipulate you into being his friend

  12. #52
    Personally I couldn't follow your post. I was with you up until the last 40% or so. If I read it correctly it sounds like you had a bad guild, the good players moved to another guild. This doesn't seem to be related to the issue though. The issue is you have a friend who you defended and is now doing stuff behind your back but you still want to be friends with her and/or her fiancee. You have also been requested to move to another server. If this is true, then the question is, do you want to raid? If so, move to the other server. You said yourself your current is dead. If you want to still be friends with the fiancee, add him on realid and stay in contact. If you want to be friends with the girl, leave her alone for a week or two and don't bring this up again like she requested. Let things cool down for a bit then talk or just let it die out and move on.

  13. #53
    Quote Originally Posted by darkpower View Post
    My guild, who didn't want to do heroics, had downed DS. However, when it was time for us to raid, we couldn't stay united. We kept making mistake after mistake and knew the weak links. There were about three of us who were doing everything right in both MV/HoF, but it kept coming down to wipes and we found we couldn't down a single boss because of a few people.

    I've stayed with the same guild despite this because it wasn't all their faults. They knew the issues and were willing to deal with them. I was FINALLY "allowed" (only term I know to use for it since I knew how to survive all the mechanics several times) to down the first HoF boss.
    Perhaps it's the way you worded this, but I'm confused. You say only a few people can perform mechanics in MV/HOF; yet in another paragraph, state being finally 'allowed' to raid. Where did your opinion come from if you weren't raiding with the guild then?

    Anyway, we came to a conclusion a few weeks before that we would take a few weeks off of raiding to get more ready (our raid leader at the time was insisting that we needed to do the dailies when I told them countless times they shouldn't need those and that the drops from raids are better if we can get our heads out of our asses and just be better raid aware). We would get more gear, learn the mechanics better and then get back in there and down something. I felt like we were actually doing well.
    This doesn't make sense at all. You complain that people aren't able to down content; and while mechanics are important, having players that can maximize dps/healing is equally important as well. Your raid leader was 100% right to make this request.

    People learn mechanics and then get kills, not the other way around: That's why it's called 'progression.'

    Raiding isn't a one person thing: It's a partnership with other players, which means it will take some longer than others time to learn the fights. Complaining that people are doing it wrong and then suggesting they shouldn't worry about obtaining hand-out upgrades that can help not only them; but your guild, is a total contradiction.

    That was, until the night where it counted. Again, same people died to the Attenuation. The raid leader unable to tell anyone to GTFO if they couldn't handle mechanics...It was instead a "do we want to stay with these losers" night. An hour and a half into things, our tank left and mass gquits began. I was able to persuade a couple to come back, and another for at least a week.
    You just complained about people dying to mechanics, yet you persuaded them to come back? Why? People gquit for various reasons.
    Also, why should your raid leader have to tell anyone to leave when people are trying to learn a fight?

    The problems were now they all went to this bigger guild. They don't have as good of a rep when it comes to attitude (they can be elitists and pricks to anyone who dares fail at the slightest thing, I was told). We decide to instead do what we should've done to begin with: go to the retros and shoot out the achievements to give us some lessons on cooperation and raid awareness.
    So basically, a bunch of people left your guild: Why is this your problem at all and why would you take someone's opinion of that guild over your own personal experience/knowledge about them?

    Well, the one that stayed for a week left for the other guild. This person had a problem with someone in our guild and this is where things go sour. This "problem child" was someone I had considered a friend. I defended her despite probably not deserving it in the minds of some. She was one that kept dying to things, yet she was willing to be replaced. This is why I thought our problems were higher up.
    Again, why is this YOUR problem? People leave for various reasons. If she left because she had problems with others in the guild, why is it even an issue?
    So what if she keeps dying to things - she isn't in your guild anymore, so it isn't your problem.

    I go to the GM of the bigger guild. The woman who left? She's friends with someone else that left. However, I was suspicious given her enthusiasm for our idea earlier that week. I ask the GM if he would know of anyone that would be trying to persuade people to leave. Almost immediately, I begin getting told to not talk to him by people in my guild. I got an in-game mail by the latest quitter saying I was very out of line and that I should "grow up".
    Why would you talk to their GM about it? So what if she's friends with someone else who left: I'm sure people did talk about it because people leave for various reasons.

    I make apologies but the problem was with recruiting. Alleria is a server that is dead on Horde side. I found these people and they gave me my first raiding chance. AH is bad, there are no pugs and nearly no one can be recruited. Our GM came up with an idea to move the guild to Kilrogg, where the population is better. It seems like the fit for us and the GM laid out reasons clearly.
    Ok.

    The one person I considered my friend is convinced my talk with the GM sabotaged chances of getting recruits. She was convinced she was correct and that the GM was keeping things from me. I pull the GM aside to let her know what I was just told. According to everyone else, it was far from it. The minds were made up before the thought crossed my mind to talk to that person. Hell, they were talking about it during the raid night.
    That's great that she feels that way, but again -- why does it bother you so much?

    She removed me from RealID, and threatened to ignore me if I said anymore about it. She can be known as rather lazy. She does good DPS and is mostly a good person, but she can rub people the wrong way. She has a condition in which she reacts with more emotion than necessary (asbergers, I think). Our GM has the same condition, but can control it better.
    Considering this is your "friend" you talk awfully bad about her. I would just let things pass over: Why does it matter if she's lazy or does good DPS -- she's no longer in your guild.

    It's Asperger's (Autism). It would depend on where she lies in the spectrum compared to the GM first of all. Secondly, while it does affect communication, it's not an excuse to be a complete and total jerk to people. If you care about your friend, you should look up the disorder to understand it better in order to improve communications.

    She is engaged to someone who I have befriended, who is a LOT more level headed. He has been comfortable talking to me and I sent the guy a FB message explaining the situation.
    What situation? It sounds like you are overreacting over this.

    The raid leader I mentioned earlier? He's also RID with her and I told him the situation, too. I asked another friend who went to the bigger guild if they thought I had helped "burn bridges". His answer? "Doubt it".
    Why is it this individual's business?

    I know for a fact if our GM was pissed, she would've not wasted time in gkicking me or not inviting me to the new server.
    You're on a dead server: The GM invited you -- what's the problem?

    I need to set things straight with this friend (her fiancé is someone I'd want to keep as a friend) and I need to be able to clear my name.
    Her fiancé is a different person: Why should it matter if you had a disagreement with her.
    It seems clear multiple people have told you, there is nothing wrong with your name so why stress?

    What should I do? Just go with the guild without trying to clear things up or do I keep toons on Alleria in the hopes I can set things right?
    Drop it and move on.
    Last edited by Beebeey; 2013-02-01 at 02:24 PM.


  14. #54
    The main problem with cutting ties is that her fiancee IS a great raider that plays his druid to near perfection. That's what makes this tough. It's not just her, the one that stands in fire and blames others when things go bad, but the other half that ends up suffering from her mistakes.

    And I wasn't exactly looking for this hardcore elitist guild. I'm not looking to raid every single day of the week. Mainly, those that have sucked know they do, and have admitted it. Those I left with are good raiders that just found Alleria to be pretty much dead.

    ---------- Post added 2013-02-01 at 09:24 AM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Barberry View Post
    Perhaps it's the way you worded this, but I'm confused. You say only a few people can perform mechanics in MV/HOF; yet in another paragraph, state being finally 'allowed' to raid. Where did your opinion come from if you weren't raiding with the guild then?
    Needed to clear this part up. "Allowed" means that with the group that had a mix of guilds in it, I downed the first boss in HoF (can't remember his name). Before this, I was able to stay out of fire and all that (following the mechanics), but because of the one or two that died, the rest of the attempt suffered. This is what I meant by "allowed" to kill the boss, not to raid (the guild knew I was a good shammy healer).
    I hear it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space, with the tuning fork, does a raw blink on Hari-Kari rock! I need scissors! 61!

  15. #55
    Blademaster
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Norway
    Posts
    32
    I think this sums it up pretty well


    Quote Originally Posted by Cayenne View Post
    I must say , that for a person, who want to avoid drama you seem to run with whispers to awful amount of people... If something bugs you- go straight about it, say what you need/want to say and stop, dont do "whisper marathon" on random countless people cause it will just stir the situation more.

  16. #56
    Pandaren Monk Freia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    Baltimore, Maryland
    Posts
    1,848
    Quote Originally Posted by Vaelorian View Post
    Totally agree. My guilds record on guys making drama without girls involved: 1
    My guilds record on guys making drama with girls involved: 2
    My guilds record on girls making drama on their own: 10+ (lost count since Wrath of the Lich King and also with only 3 exceptions didn't allow girls in our guild anymore, this was unanymously decided by the guild)

    ---------- Post added 2013-02-01 at 02:29 PM ----------

    I want to add that I totally like girls fine in WoW. Just generally speaking they cause a lot of problems, be it through guys or just themselves. And then you have the issue that most of the girls I had in my guild (as a trial) never passed the trial. Be it due to drama already caused or that they plainly sucked.

    Now again I have met a few select girls that really did hold their own and didn't cause drama. I count 3 (a priest, a hunter and a mage). The girls that were skilled but caused drama 2 priests 1 mage 1 paladin (not caused drama during the trial). This is based on 7 years recruitment. Mind you we are a guild that was in it for progression. Not a social guild. I wouldn't mind that much if we were a social guild. I think girls in WoW generally speaking are ideal for social guilds.
    And most of the time I have found this supposed drama that comes from good female players is often manifested from guys for a number of reasons. They could be mad they got outdone by a girl. They may lose loot to her and then get it in their head that she got it simply for being female. Or they expect her to always be the positive, nice cheerleader-type who never gives any sort of criticism and sugar coat everything all the time and the second she doesn't fit that mold, she is a bitch and a drama queen. Guys take criticism or general feedback from girls differently than they do from guys. Progression can be stressful and everyone can get frustrated to have to mask it all the time while guys don't.

  17. #57
    (I assume based on WoWProgress that we are talking about Alleria-US not Alleria-EU.)

    Two things that came to mind immediately:
    - Why would you go to Kilrogg-US there are a ton of better realms out there. Bad choice imo.
    - Move all your characters that you need/want or have the money for. Cross realms makes everything possible besides current tier raiding and I doubt you will be doing that anytime soon on Alleria.

    On the personal issue:
    What I can relate to is that I have been on a small server before (during BC). Only 2 guilds on said realm (horde side) were able to raid at all. Both guilds were pretty awful but in this small pond they were the big fish.

    Everyone knew each other and rumors spread fast. Stories were modified or falsified based on personal agendas and dislikes. In general a low pop WoW realm shares many of the characteristics of a small village community.

    Eventually I had enough of it and left for a much bigger realm. Been raiding happily ever after .


    On the progress issue:
    I agree with you. In normal mode mechanics are what wipes a raid and NOT gear. If you cannot stay out of attinuation no amount of dailies will save you. And if someone still fails to dodge something like attinuation after the 50th attempt you just need to replace those people.

    That isn't being an 'elitist'. If you are bad on that kind of level and fail to make any progress then there is simply no other solution.

  18. #58
    Quote Originally Posted by gend View Post
    (I assume based on WoWProgress that we are talking about Alleria-US not Alleria-EU.)

    Two things that came to mind immediately:
    - Why would you go to Kilrogg-US there are a ton of better realms out there. Bad choice imo.
    - Move all your characters that you need/want or have the money for. Cross realms makes everything possible besides current tier raiding and I doubt you will be doing that anytime soon on Alleria.
    1. Yeah, its US Alleria
    2. It was the GM's choice, actually. She knew of some people there, and it was more of a balance between Horde and Alliance instead of the lopsidedness one way or the other.
    3. It's still a medium sized server. One of my preferences is that I want to be where I don't have to wait in a queue every time I want to play the game. Places like Illidan have high pop, but the risk of having to wait to play is something I'd rather not have to deal with, and neither would anyone else I play with.
    4. We enjoy other things in this game besides raiding. Yes, we really, REALLY want to raid, but that doesn't mean we never want to do things like pet battles or challenge modes or other things that the game has to offer. Raiding doesn't take up our WoW lives, but when we do, we tend to do it well (might not seem it from the current situation we were in, though).


    On the progress issue:
    I agree with you. In normal mode mechanics are what wipes a raid and NOT gear. If you cannot stay out of attinuation no amount of dailies will save you. And if someone still fails to dodge something like attinuation after the 50th attempt you just need to replace those people.

    That isn't being an 'elitist'. If you are bad on that kind of level and fail to make any progress then there is simply no other solution.
    This is exactly what I was mentioning about the raid leader. People were saying he was getting tired of people wiping all the time and he didn't have an easy solution. But he wouldn't take initiative and do something about it.

    Thing is, we did a Retro DS achievement run the Thursday after. We had this 11 year old kid (what he claimed he was...don't ask how he got into the guild to begin with) begging for us to bring him. We thought "why not" since we can carry some people through something we're OPed for. Well....let's just say he was a brat. Teabagging people (I kid you not), ruining our chance at one achieve, and when we got to Spine, did the fight very wrong, started the fight before anyone was ready, and made us wipe on that boss. We got rid of him, he left the guild, and as soon as he left, we downed the boss with no issues.

    You should've heard the many times I said "how hard was that to do" because that's how easy it was to get rid of the person who was killing the raid, and if it was that easy to replace someone in a retro run (which we love doing, too: nothing like reliving WoW's past every once in a while), why was it so tough to do in current content. I just think our raid leader didn't want to be leader anymore and was trying to give us an excuse to take over lead.
    I hear it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space, with the tuning fork, does a raw blink on Hari-Kari rock! I need scissors! 61!

  19. #59
    Quote Originally Posted by darkpower View Post
    2. It was the GM's choice, actually. She knew of some people there, and it was more of a balance between Horde and Alliance instead of the lopsidedness one way or the other.
    3. It's still a medium sized server. One of my preferences is that I want to be where I don't have to wait in a queue every time I want to play the game. Places like Illidan have high pop, but the risk of having to wait to play is something I'd rather not have to deal with, and neither would anyone else I play with.
    Fair enough. Kilrogg isn't terrible it just wouldn't have been my first choice personally.

    Quote Originally Posted by darkpower View Post
    4. We enjoy other things in this game besides raiding. Yes, we really, REALLY want to raid, but that doesn't mean we never want to do things like pet battles or challenge modes or other things that the game has to offer. Raiding doesn't take up our WoW lives, but when we do, we tend to do it well (might not seem it from the current situation we were in, though).
    You can do all of that cross realm. So if you have someone that you want to hang out with RealID and it doesn't matter what realm they are on.

    As to yur kid comment and retro runs. It's really not the same thing as raiding current tier (imo).

  20. #60
    Quote Originally Posted by Freia View Post
    And most of the time I have found this supposed drama that comes from good female players is often manifested from guys for a number of reasons. They could be mad they got outdone by a girl. They may lose loot to her and then get it in their head that she got it simply for being female. Or they expect her to always be the positive, nice cheerleader-type who never gives any sort of criticism and sugar coat everything all the time and the second she doesn't fit that mold, she is a bitch and a drama queen. Guys take criticism or general feedback from girls differently than they do from guys. Progression can be stressful and everyone can get frustrated to have to mask it all the time while guys don't.
    Totally true. That happened one time to us. It might be more common but for us it was one time.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •