For starters, if your town is that bad for jobs, are there any other towns/cities close by or are you out in BFE? Your description of the temp office sounds more like a day labor place. Not trying to bust your chops, but if you don't know, there is a difference. A real temp office should get your info, possibly give you a few tests, and call you when something comes up or has you call early in the morning to find out if there's anything. A day labor place has you sitting around like a jackass, praying they'll need someone and, if not many people call, you sit there the whole day. As far as the mechanic stuff, a lack of certification will obviously hurt you, but not at something like a parts shop or junkyard. If you don't like it, that's fine. Do it for now if you can, and develop a plan for the future. You mentioned something before about having to compete with 17-18 year olds for the same entry-level jobs, but if you have the maturity to identify the issues you've posted here and the guts to actually post and ask for help, you'll probably have a good opportunity for advancement. Remember, you don't have to stay there. You can also try hitting up government websites for jobs in your area city/county/state/federal. Just google them one at a time, but understand that hiring is usually a long process through the government.
I asked about family because I wanted to know if there's anyone that could help you out there. The only thought I have there would be if you all relocated to another area. However, if you do something like that, most of the places with jobs are going to be costly as far as rent, unless you have a decent commute involved. If you're considering going to D.C., see if you can find out what the job market is like prior to leaving. If you'd be living with this dude, make sure you find what ALL of his expectations would be for you living there. You don't want to put yourself in a worse situation, although I'll admit that I have a generally negative view of roommates.
The military was kind of an idle thought. If you can get your weight under control, great. If not, you'll have to pursue other options, which leads us back to college. I don't know about the college closest to you, but I'm led to believe that most colleges will have an office that helps you get a job. Well, I'm hoping it wasn't just mine at any rate. Game development is certainly possible, but there's obviously a few steps you'll have to take before that, and hey, if it doesn't work out, you'll have the background for a lot of other positions.
The main reason I asked if you were religious is that you would have potential connections at a church. A lot of people there would know who owns a business, who's hiring and so on.