A male initiating a divorce? I thought it was some old urban legend

[Theinquisition]

Until we start seeing equality within hetero marriage become the norm, we'll continue to have divorce laws that protect the dependent partner. As long as women are unpaid domestic servants, they'll be protected in divorce when men decide to trade them in for a newer model.

I think unpaid is a misnomer. At least for the military wives anyway.

Free education
Free healthcare
subsidized childcare
provided housing

sounds like a hell of a deal.

[Bryntrollian]

What? A lack of trust is not the first rule to a healthy relationship.

That is because a " healthy " relationship is a complete work of fiction.

[Deleted]

That is because a " healthy " relationship is a complete work of fiction.

Why do you think that?

[shimerra]

Until we start seeing equality within hetero marriage become the norm, we'll continue to have divorce laws that protect the dependent partner. As long as women are unpaid domestic servants, they'll be protected in divorce when men decide to trade them in for a newer model.

You've got it ass backwards. A huge part of why divorce rates gone up are because women aren't just the dependent partner any more. Shoot back 200 years and the obstacles to being a single woman, especially with children, were staggering compared to today. The result? Women stayed in marriage no sane woman would today, there just weren't the options both in terms of maintaining their own economics independence not to mention they had a harder time with the legal system. Don't get me wrong that's not to say it's easy for everyone but let's not kid ourselves, the overwhelming majority of women in marriages aren't these unpaid slaves you make them out to be.

You also mistake unpaid domestic servant with someone who takes care of the house work while another provides the money. If a man makes 100$ an hour and a woman makes 50$ an hour it makes economic sense for her to devote more time to house work and him to his outside job. The gender is really completely irrelevant to my example before you go off on me about that. For my parents they wanted someone to stay home and take care of me and my siblings while we were young, my mother stayed home until the oldest of us was old enough to babysit the rest of us. My dad's job paid better, had better benefits, and because he worked 4 long days meant the three days off was a benefit to them and saved them money on child care. My mom was no unpaid domestic servant, both did house work she just did more, they made a sensible economic and family choice based on rationally examining the cost and benefits.

Equality is far more the norm in hetero marriages than you imply. Most marriages both partners are working, either part or full time. That being said if we're looking at cases of inequality, such as domestic abuse, yes men still dominate.

That is because a " healthy " relationship is a complete work of fiction.

Why? What terrible thing was done to you or what sad movie did you watch to leave you so jaded? Or do you just have some unreasonable expectation for what makes a healthy relationship.

[Cthulhu 2020]

For once I can agree with supertony.

There are in fact women who seek out service men who are going through training/schooling after basic training specifically to suck the benefits off of them. Not bashing women, but this culture exists and these populations of leeches live in close proximity to military schools. They are however, very a much a niche group of women.

[Rendia]

I initiated my divorce. Got tired of being a punching bag (literally and verbally) for her.

[Theinquisition]

For once I can agree with supertony.

There are in fact women who seek out service men who are going through training/schooling after basic training specifically to suck the benefits off of them. Not bashing women, but this culture exists and these populations of leeches live in close proximity to military schools. They are however, very a much a niche group of women.

cool....i didnt know we disagreed often. any paticular topic?

[Jerion]

That being said if we're looking at cases of inequality, such as domestic abuse, yes men still dominate.

No, they don't.

[Jtbrig7390]

To everyone who keeps trying to spin this into "well males cheat as well in the army"

Let me ask you one simple question: What do you hear/see more happen a male in the army blowing his brains out because his girl cheated on him or a girl in the army blowing her brains out due to a guy cheating on her.

It isn't a blame game but it is a huge fact there is tons of women who only date a army guy for the benfits and the thrill of having there cake and eating it to.

Now i'm not saying all do but a lot dose and the number "if there was a scale" would be higher then a male doing it even more so because there is way more males in the army then females.

Someone even said that its around 40 to 1.

On topic: depending where you are at it may be rare to see a male initiate divorce due to the laws about being marry'ed

Here in my state the women can not take half of your stuff when divorce unless its a special case of corse but 9 times out of 10 they can't. "Last time i checked"

My state is kentucky if anyone wants to look it up.

[Theinquisition]

To everyone who keeps trying to spin this into "well males cheat as well in the army"

Let me ask you one simple question: What do you hear/see more happen a male in the army blowing his brains out because his girl cheated on him or a girl in the army blowing her brains out due to a guy cheating on her.

It isn't a blame game but it is a huge fact there is tons of women who only date a army guy for the benfits and the thrill of having there cake and eating it to.

Now i'm not saying all do but a lot dose and the number "if there was a scale" would be higher then a male doing it even more so because there is way more males in the army then females.

Someone even said that its around 40 to 1.

On topic: depending where you are at it may be rare to see a male initiate divorce due to the laws about being marry'ed

Here in my state the women can not take half of your stuff when divorce unless its a special case of corse but 9 times out of 10 they can't. "Last time i checked"

My state is kentucky if anyone wants to look it up.

Ive always heard kentucky is a shitty state to get divorced in.

[Jtbrig7390]

Ive always heard kentucky is a shitty state to get divorced in.

Well I won't lie I never been marry'ed myself but that is what I have always been told.

My dad was marry'ed to my mom and she didn't take half of his stuff.

So I could be wrong but my point is each state is different so it just depends.

[-Zait-]

It happens, it's sad but it happens : /

[terrorlord15]

Honestly, I think your both a bunch of stupid morons, the women are complete greed demons obsessed with money for doing what they do to their army husbands instead of just saying "listen If you leave to go be a moron and murder random people for our corrupt as hell government that destroyed the economy (america) and just wants iraqs oil your a damn fool for believing your serving any moral good purpose at all" and leave them on fair terms.

And the army men are morons for being in the army in the first place thinking they are doing any good thing or beating any bad guys they are just murdering people so america can get oil and don't seem to realise america started this whole conflict to begin with trying to dictate, control and steal iran/iraq/pakistans, ect resources when it wasn't even their country.

Stop blinding serving and murdering and fighting and thinking your helping, I help people, its by being kind, giving, caring, understanding, generous, forgiving, its not about learning how to use a life destroying machine (gun) and assassination (sneaking up behind someone and slitting their throat) murdering different colour people than you thinking they are demon enemies with complete evil in their heart, research the facts america started this they are just defending and retaliating, Not saying they are saints that continant is REALLY fucked up and their religious madness and violence is disgusting but america isn't far away from that with their own religious dogma.

Stop wasting your lives in some other hell country murdering people and being surprised your wives don't want to waste their lives waiting for you (though they should just tell you they are leaving and stop taking your money) Unless you are just evil and only joined the military as an excuse to murder people then fair enough I guess, I don't agree with your sadistic darkness but if your actually a good person and just ignorant know that being in the military isn't a moral good thing thats helping anyone except the rich and powerful become more rich and powerful.

Infracted: Please do not insult other users

[Theinquisition]

Honestly, I think your both a bunch of stupid morons, the women are complete greed demons obsessed with money for doing what they do to their army husbands instead of just saying "listen If you leave to go be a moron and murder random people for our corrupt as hell government that destroyed the economy (america) and just wants iraqs oil your a damn fool for believing your serving any moral good purpose at all" and leave them on fair terms.

And the army men are morons for being in the army in the first place thinking they are doing any good thing or beating any bad guys they are just murdering people so america can get oil and don't seem to realise america started this whole conflict to begin with trying to dictate, control and steal iran/iraq/pakistans, ect resources when it wasn't even their country.

Stop blinding serving and murdering and fighting and thinking your helping, I help people, its by being kind, giving, caring, understanding, generous, forgiving, its not about learning how to use a life destroying machine (gun) and assassination (sneaking up behind someone and slitting their throat) murdering different colour people than you thinking they are demon enemies with complete evil in their heart, research the facts america started this they are just defending and retaliating, Not saying they are saints that continant is REALLY fucked up and their religious madness and violence is disgusting but america isn't far away from that with their own religious dogma.

Stop wasting your lives in some other hell country murdering people and being surprised your wives don't want to waste their lives waiting for you (though they should just tell you they are leaving and stop taking your money) Unless you are just evil and only joined the military as an excuse to murder people then fair enough I guess, I don't agree with your sadistic darkness but if your actually a good person and just ignorant know that being in the military isn't a moral good thing thats helping anyone except the rich and powerful become more rich and powerful.

lol boy you were quick to derail the thread.

I'm happy being in the military and with my military service. I'm a helicopter mechanic not a murderer thank you. I'm not sure you even know what the word murder means.

I fel bad for you i really do. You seem to be a person filled with hate. I hope you can find jesus.

[Ebildays]

Honestly, I think your both a bunch of stupid morons, the women are complete greed demons obsessed with money for doing what they do to their army husbands instead of just saying "listen If you leave to go be a moron and murder random people for our corrupt as hell government that destroyed the economy (america) and just wants iraqs oil your a damn fool for believing your serving any moral good purpose at all" and leave them on fair terms.

And the army men are morons for being in the army in the first place thinking they are doing any good thing or beating any bad guys they are just murdering people so america can get oil and don't seem to realise america started this whole conflict to begin with trying to dictate, control and steal iran/iraq/pakistans, ect resources when it wasn't even their country.

Stop blinding serving and murdering and fighting and thinking your helping, I help people, its by being kind, giving, caring, understanding, generous, forgiving, its not about learning how to use a life destroying machine (gun) and assassination (sneaking up behind someone and slitting their throat) murdering different colour people than you thinking they are demon enemies with complete evil in their heart, research the facts america started this they are just defending and retaliating, Not saying they are saints that continant is REALLY fucked up and their religious madness and violence is disgusting but america isn't far away from that with their own religious dogma.

Stop wasting your lives in some other hell country murdering people and being surprised your wives don't want to waste their lives waiting for you (though they should just tell you they are leaving and stop taking your money) Unless you are just evil and only joined the military as an excuse to murder people then fair enough I guess, I don't agree with your sadistic darkness but if your actually a good person and just ignorant know that being in the military isn't a moral good thing thats helping anyone except the rich and powerful become more rich and powerful.

People like you should just leave America and live in one of the "better" countries. No where in this post have your shown yourself to be kind, giving, caring, understanding, generous, or forgiving, the only thing you have shown is that you are a judgmental asshole.

I want to comment on the army wives, someone do see men in the army as a way to escape their small towns or poor life. They have dreams of being stationed in places like Japan or Hawaii and living some fantasy life. Which is all wrong but I also fault the guys that picked these women and chose to marry them without getting to know them.

[Theinquisition]

You do know that quite a few men cheat on their wives with fellow female soilders while they are deployed. It happens allot actually. I've seen so many wives divorce their husbands because they find out.

I'm not denying it happens, but its the exception not the rule.

Its just a plain numbers game, men outnumber women 40 to 1 while deployed, it just doesn't happen nearly as often as ive seen army wives cheat on their husbands.

BTW i hate unicorns

---------- Post added 2013-02-21 at 09:44 PM ----------

People like you should just leave America and live in one of the "better" countries. No where in this post have your shown yourself to be kind, giving, caring, understanding, generous, or forgiving, the only thing you have shown is that you are a judgmental asshole.

I want to comment on the army wives, someone do see men in the army as a way to escape their small towns or poor life. They have dreams of being stationed in places like Japan or Hawaii and living some fantasy life. Which is all wrong but I also fault the guys that picked these women and chose to marry them without getting to know them.

yeah i can agree with that last part.

[Spectral]

Then again im in the army, typically the guys starting divorces do so because they maried raging whores who jump on every dick they can the second their husband deploys.

Alternatively, they got married and abandoned their wives, leaving them emotionally and sexually unfulfilled.

[blackblade]

It's uncommon, but you're probably pushing the envelope calling it an "Urban Legend"

Given the crazy high rate of divorce these days, though, It's kind of hard to believe people aren't becoming more cautious about getting married in the first place.

[Spectral]

A REAL Military wife knows that deployments are a real possibility, and that if she can't handle them she shouldn't of gotten married to a Military man....She can't blame anyone but herself. Abandonment? Please.....

Well, indeed, I wouldn't recommend marrying someone in the military. It's a fundamentally bad idea, given that it's almost inevitable that you'll be isolated from your partner for an extended period. That's not really good for human relationships, and it leads to seeking affection elsewhere more often than not.

If nothing else, military wives should be discrete about who they're fucking on the side though.

[Theinquisition]

A REAL Military wife knows that deployments are a real possibility, and that if she can't handle them she shouldn't of gotten married to a Military man....She can't blame anyone but herself. Abandonment? Please.....

My husband has been deployed 4 times and I have NEVER cheated on him, or thought I was "abandoned" by him.

You said it well sister.

Let me be clear the majority of military wives are good women, i jst harp about the bad ones becaue i have seen them wreck havok.

I'ma smack that unicorn