Never eat and raid in WoW!

[False]

****WARNING***

The following story is a true story that happened to me a couple of weeks ago in an excitement to get geared for patch 5.2 new raid content. Please be advised that this story might make some of you quit raiding or quit eating before raiding.

It was Feb 28, 2013, when I read on MMO champion that patch 5.2 is going to be released comes March 06, 2013. I was excited and I wanted to get geared so I will have the minimum ilevel requirement to zone into this new raid dungeon.

It all started in the evening of Tuesday , Feb 28, 2013, when I log on to my WoW account to get ready to raid Terrace of Endless Spring after a long maintenance. I am the main tank in my guild. Our 10 man raid started at exactly 8:00 p.m. and I knew we are going to clear this raid instance without any problem. We successfully cleared 2 bosses and got to Lei Shi and we took a 15 minute bio break.

I said to myself , "This might be a good time to eat food" and I remembered I brought home some spicy Bean Burritos. So I went to my fridge and I put those Bean Burritos in the microwave and let it go. I had 13 minute left in my raid bio break so grabbed those bean burrito and ate it. It was tasty, crispy and REALLY REALLY spicy that i burned the tip of my tongue from the SPICE.

I get back to my chair to get ready to raid and everyone was ready to go. it took us 10-15 minutes to clear Lei'shi and it was all good. We reach the last boss and my stomach started to growl and I couldn't handle it. So I run to the toilet....

At first I thought I was going to die but no I went in and proceeded to give birth to this thing.

"Oww!" I shrieked. "Just get it over with and come out!" and it was not long I heard the beast slowly coming out making noises "psftftftsbssssss"

As it came out of me I could feel my anus stretching to its limit, but nothing a grown man couldn't take. Wiping, I noticed a little blood on the toilet paper. I got up to see what I had birthed. A log a good fifteen inches long and two inches thick.

There was no way that my dying toilet was going to able to handle this. Karma can be cruel but I had to stand up fight against this monster so I broke out the TURD CHOPPER, chopped it in half, and then flashed. The giant beast swirled away to the murky depths of below.

I returned back to WoW and I was kicked out of my guild for going ninja afk.

There you have it folks eating and raiding is not a good idea.

Cheers

[checking facts]

dafuq did I read

[Deleted]

I had a good laugh from this. Let this be a lesson to us all, spicy food and raiding is a bad combination.

[Darsithis]

Not acceptable or appropriate here