Salon article - "Can men be taught not to rape?"

[Hedleyazg]

Sadly, most get away with a slap on the wrist whereas the man that was accused has had his life ruined. Shit sticks, even if it is just lies.

This is quite true. I know someone that was falsely accused, ended up in court over it and had a bunch of legal fees he ended up paying due to it in the neighborhood of $10k.

[Raiju]

Can women be taught not to rape? Or are we assuming that only men rape?

Enough of the posters countries laws do

/joke

[Deleted]

Can women be taught not to rape? Or are we assuming that only men rape?

Women need to be raised to believe that because of their gender they're all going to kill their own offspring.

[Raidenx]

This is quite true. I know someone that was falsely accused, ended up in court over it and had a bunch of legal fees he ended up paying due to it in the neighborhood of $10k.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...ons-teams.html

[Hedleyazg]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...ons-teams.html

Yes, that story is also quite relevant to this thread.

[Deleted]

also this.
i'm detecting a hint of the typical "nice guy" argument.

Hint of typical "nice guy" argument?

Hehe they aren't aggressive assholes to women they want.. just everyone else around them.

I've seen way too many women with the turds of maleness, most of the time they don't realize it until the realization of their mistake in mating occurs.

It's like the Jersey shore argument... if you want guys to stop being artificial testosterone and roidraging morons with spikey hair... stop fucking them.

You actually think 'aggressive assholes' get women? They do not. I like guys who are dominant, doesn't mean I like guys who are aggressive assholes.

[Noomz]

http://www.salon.com/2013/03/08/can_...t_not_to_rape/

Here's an excerpt:

"I don’t think that we should be telling women anything. I think we should be telling men not to rape women and start the conversation there.” She told Hannity, “You’re talking about this as if it’s some faceless, nameless criminal, when a lot of times it’s someone you know and trust,” adding, “If you train men not to grow up to become rapists, you prevent rape.”

--

I agree with the central idea, but disagree with the approach.

Men are not wild beasts who need to be trained like animals to prevent this or that behavior. This should not be some kind of crusader mission which targets solely one group, shifts all the blame and accountability on them to change, and engage in blame tactics.

The people who engage in these monstrous acts...with the most extreme sadistic cases put aside, I do believe that much of this can be avoid entirely, IF:

- More programs, social instruction, and simply more explicitly defined social rules were made more clear, and incentives as a result of following through as such.

To illustrate, let's think back to the old days of the 1800's of England customs. A gentlemen was expected to act a very specific way, but more importantly society had rigidly defined protocol on how to greet a lady, how to engage in small talk, what behaviors were completely unacceptable, so on and so forth. Today these are completely silly and absurd, but some gentlemanly actions persist today, but by and large this a free for all. There is no hard and fast rule for anyone to enforce nor frown upon.

But most of all, no clear and firm direction, no "how-to" guide or a set of standards that are accepted as the standard for person-to-person communications. I'm not talking about pick-up artist guides(which deserves a separate topic altogether). Calling someone "stupid" or "retarded" for not simply picking up subtle social cues, misreading/misjudging a person's facial expressions, tone and delivery of their words does not help anyone.I believe there's a level of frustration behind the actions that lead up to rape. This goes beyond just simple mis-communication. "Common sense" is not the same thing to the next guy.

There needs to be a "how-to" gentleman's handbook which contains content that everyone from your grandmother, the single female family members looking for a bf/husband, to your little sisters upon reading it, universally agree that this is the ruleset to be followed by men.

It doesn't mean that you copy paste everything that's in the book and follow everything so rigidly that you become the butt of everyone's jokes. It does mean however, that OK - when all else fails? Fall back upon the handbook and adhere to the principles within, which would have had the enthusiastic approval and satisfaction from three different generations of women.

This is what I believe, would go a long way towards resolving the issue.

While we're at it, we could tell criminals how not to be criminal, murderers not to murder and so on. Yeah, super smart.

I just low how feminism talks about me as a man like I was some mindless, raping monster.

[GreatSageCorban]

wait wait wait... your telling me Rape is wrong and illegal?
http://www.bloodygoodhorror.com/bgh/...pires-kiss.jpg

Hold on, let me run down this hallway and spread the news.

Run Run Run Run
Corban:"Guys! Quick stop what your doing! Rape is illegal!

[Deleted]

wait wait wait... your telling me Rape is wrong?

Evidently with this article, only when commited by a man, BECAUSE ALL MEN ARE IMMORAL AND EVIL RAPIST PIGS!

[Ratyrel]

I'm pretty sure western society already does... the number of rape incidents would obviously be a lot higher, if there were no societal inhibitions in place. This entire approach seems mindless.

[Tychoblu]

Or just raise your children not to be animals.

[Deleted]

Outstanding idea, but why stop at rape? Let's tell people to not commit ANY crimes - then we can close all the prisons. We'll save billions. My god, why have we not done this before?!

[Deleted]

Or just raise your children not to be animals.

Some just seem to be born to be sadists.

[Zonas]

Because men who rape women don't see anything wrong with it at all. So we need to roll up a newspaper and beat their noses in untill they learn to stop pissing on the rug, er- I mean, putting their thing in her thing...

While we're at it, we can teach women not to allow themselves to be raped. I mean, the way they dress and act, they all secretly want it... they know they do... God, can't even type that with a straight face.

Maybe we can tell people not to kill other people, or jaywalk, or use naughty words around children.

[Roose]

Hint of typical "nice guy" argument?

also this.
i'm detecting a hint of the typical "nice guy" argument.

Perhaps a hint of it. I have been accused of worse things. I guess I am the hopeless loser in all this, and I may be whiny, but I will not be a contributing factor to our rape culture. So bash the "nice guy" all you want, but they are not the ones making the sexual assault numbers what they are. They are not the reason that about one in five women in the US are sexually assaulted.

Chivalry is dead, and women killed it.

[Shuji V2]

I don't think rape is something that can disapear over time, if at all. As long as there is a sexual drive (aka nature) for both men and women, it will continue to exist.

What I find more interesting is, why is rape about the absolute worst thing that can happen to a woman, but for men they wouldn't get taken seriously or say they would enjoy it even? Woman are left emotionally scarred for the rest of their lives while I could use some right now (I'm serious, I wouldn't mind). But then again it wouldn't be rape then lol.

[oblivionx]

You actually think 'aggressive assholes' get women? They do not. I like guys who are dominant, doesn't mean I like guys who are aggressive assholes.

By no means do I even hint at what you like or even your choices.

I'm merely saying you see a lot of women drawn to the guys that every other guy know are the aggressive assholes.

[Deleted]

use naughty words around children.

Off Topic: Why are they "naughty words", seriously, they are just substitutions for other words. I mean for fucks sake, if i can't swear for the sake of not offending someone that person can go fuck them self, brutally.

[Deleted]

Outstanding idea, but why stop at rape? Let's tell people to not commit ANY crimes - then we can close all the prisons. We'll save billions. My god, why have we not done this before?!

Oh my god, this is genius!

[Deleted]

how about we stop being fucking insulting and sexist and just teach everyone to be decent human beings.

What a totally retarded, sexist and utterly ignorant think for her to say.