Exactly, looking back it's no wonder I never "got the girl" no one should have to be an emotional crutch for another persons lack of self esteem, I'd imagine that would be exhausting and unpleasant.
Exactly, looking back it's no wonder I never "got the girl" no one should have to be an emotional crutch for another persons lack of self esteem, I'd imagine that would be exhausting and unpleasant.
Trust me it is, you try to make them feel good and smile but they always want to be debbie downers all the time, and its very exhausting/unpleasant.
About the tab, I think it should be kinda I pay, you pay, I pay, you pay... not always I pay and you collect more money in your account, but with today's society most of the time people think you are a dbag if you ask a girl to pay for something that you have been paying for a long time. And if you get married to a girl you will be paying your whole life for everything... even sex :P
If you are in the process of knowing each other, absolutelly.
If it is a long time girlfriend or relationship, you may work out.
Though more often than not, I do pay the whole tab when I go out with my girlfriend.
Excuses, excuses.. You finish last, or should I say you don't finish at all, because you don't even try. Shocking, isn't it? This applies not only into women, but to pretty much everything.
Put it this way: You are yourself, but in an imaginary world. There is plenty of decent girls swarming around you, and they seem to be interested in you. And then there's this quiet, average-looking at tops, maybe even a bit creepy one who's just there on her own, not approaching you in any manner, not showing any form of interest in you whatsoever. You would most definitely ignore them around you, go to this one girl and ask her out, now would you?
Whoever makes the most money should pay ;p
The most successful tyranny is not the one that uses force to assure uniformity but the one that removes the awareness of other possibilities.
I'm old fashioned so I think the man should pay, especially if they're the one asking out. It's always nice when a woman reaches for the check though and doesn't just expect to get the meal for free.
When you start dating its simple
"You ask you pay"
Once your together its even more simple:
You keep it even, one time you pay the next time she does.
This heads off any resentments that may build up after a long time of dating, or argument that may insue because one partner feels he/she is paying for everything etc...
The same concept can be used for sex, going out with friends, going to familys houses for holidays, cooking dinner at home, picking out a movie to rent/watch. When you "keep it even" in every aspect... you will be suprised how little there is to disagree about and how peaceful your relationship can become.
Relationships at the core are about keeping everything as close to even as possible so no arguments come up that can be avoided. Its hard enough to find a solid relationship with everything thats going on in 2 different peoples lives, the last thing you want to hear after a long day is you man/woman complaining cause you never paid for the movies or dinner.
I always pay when we go out, I don't allow her to even consider paying. I believe that it empowers women and makes them feel special. It shows that you as a man are willing to do some small things to make her feel a little more special. I see it as being a gentleman, in the same sense that I open doors for her and wait for her to go in first or I hold the umbrella so she can hold onto my arm, or I carry most of the shopping bags even if they re not so heavy. It's just those little things that will make her feel special and happier, and so am I for doing these things.
Equality, in dating, sounds nice but it's boring as hell for me and I do believe that most women would want the man to go to at least the "burden" of buying them dinner.
You could share the food, tho not on a first date. I used to do that, even more when you are with more friends or on a double date. A good example is at pizza, order the big size and offer to split. On all of the occasions I think only once, a date said no, and it ended up being a bit wierd as even the normal size was so big that I couldn't finish it.
But on normal date, each time they offered to split the tab. One thing I try to do is be consume/order under 50% so even when she splits if you go 50-50 you pay a bit more and in the situation where she is maybe good with math and she adds it up she will know you paid a bit more for her part also.
There wasn't much to discuss in the beginning, and I really shouldn't have allowed this thread to get this far. It's pretty clear from the opening post that there wasn't any desire for real discussion than there was for validation that what he was doing was "right".
Closing.