Girlfriend seems unreasonably pissed off at me

[Rabian]

Honestly I'd say end the relationship. As previous poster stated...if shes like this now it will only get worse later. People tend to be on their best "behavior" early in a relationship, and after years you might not even feel like you're with the same person you started dating. Find a girl with common interests so you don't have to fight about the free time you have together. And yes there are plenty of girls who like video games and theatre, go to a LARP convention

[snowcrash512]

Anybody who tries to make you stop doing what you enjoy just to make themselves happy isnt worth your time, women come and go, but opportunities to do something you really enjoy such as theater are not something you should pass up. If she acts like this over something trivial its only a matter of time before you are not allowed to do ANYTHING but pay attention to her, get out now.

[Super Friendly Kitty Cat]

So I have informed my friends of the situation and they all agree with me, but that's what friends do; so I wanted to get some opinions from people "outside" the situation.

So my girlfriend and I live together but work opposite schedules. She works 6-2 and I work 4-10. We don't see each other everyday save for in the morning and when I go to bed. However we both have Sundays and Wednesdays off together and I don't work Thursdays either so we spend that together too when she gets home. I have a few hobbies, online gaming (which I never play when we are both home together unless she is in bed and I am still up) and local theater with a group of friends I have been performing with for years. Now the thing is that I haven't done a show for almost a full year (the majority of the time we have been together) and recently I had auditioned for two shows, one opens this month, the other in June. She wasn't happy as they rehearse one day a week but it's on Sunday and takes up a decent chunk of the day (10-5). So I knew she was upset that we wouldn't have Sundays together for a while so I dropped out of the one opening this month.

So you work four days a week, and work about 22-24 hours a week, and play video games which you call a "hobby" the rest of the week, while your girlfriend works 5 days a week and works 40 hours?

Sounds like your girlfriend has a lot to be upset about.

If you really want to flit and fancy around on a stage, can't you do it on one of the days you don't spend time with your girlfriend since you only have a part-time job?

[Resies]

Get a less clingy GF, imo.

[Dasffion]

Get a less clingy GF, imo.

Again, I'm wondering how many people with responses like this have had a serious relationship or at least been in a similar situation. Wanting to spend time with your significant other on one of 2 days that you have together isn't clingy.

[Reeve]

If I was her, I'd be upset too.. it would only leave 1 day for you to be together and that's not enough for a serious relationship to work. It is selfish.. you work late and then you want more time for your hobbies which don't involve her. Why not compromise instead? Get a 9-5 job or try to find more time from other activities to spend with her.

People should do what makes them happy, there's no arguing with that but a relationship is also a compromise. If you taking up that hobby leaves her with less she bargained for, then obviously she cant do what makes her happy if she wants to stay with you because you changed something.

Taking up a hobby that takes up half of 8 days of the year isn't unreasonable. This is especially true when he already met her halfway by dropping one of the two shows he wanted to do.

[Dasffion]

Taking up a hobby that takes up half of 8 days of the year isn't unreasonable.

It is when it's half the time he gets to spend with her.

Again though I'm not saying he should dump her or the show. He should try to involve her in it.

[Reeve]

It is when it's half the time he gets to spend with her.

Again though I'm not saying he should dump her or the show. He should try to involve her in it.

He should do that, but if she can't handle having a slightly reduced time with him for a total of 56 hours per year, there's something wrong.

[Resies]

It is when it's half the time he gets to spend with her.

Again though I'm not saying he should dump her or the show. He should try to involve her in it.

Not at all, his GF is being unreasonable, not him. I could ignore my ex for a week if I wanted to and she wouldn't bat an eyelash (not that I ever did intentionally).

[Rabian]

Again, I'm wondering how many people with responses like this have had a serious relationship or at least been in a similar situation. Wanting to spend time with your significant other on one of 2 days that you have together isn't clingy.

The issue isn't her being clingy its that she refuses to even try to be a part of his activities. That's why I think he should just find a girl he has more in common with.

[Aeluron Lightsong]

Not at all, his GF is being unreasonable, not him. I could ignore my ex for a week if I wanted to and she wouldn't bat an eyelash (not that I ever did intentionally).

Ignore him for a week? Ummm I think that's a stretch and or that relationship IMO...is not so...well..seems there's something missing there.

[DieFichte]

Again, I'm wondering how many people with responses like this have had a serious relationship or at least been in a similar situation. Wanting to spend time with your significant other on one of 2 days that you have together isn't clingy.

I don't know how people only get to see eachother 1-2 days a week? I work 45 hours a week (+ overtime) my gf works about the same, that's like 10 hours for work a day, that's still plenty of room, even if you get the worst schedules ever. People just need some flexibility. If I work night, I'm finished about the same time as my gf, if I work early I come home a some hours before she goes to bed, and if I work late we see eachother before I get to work and after. (yes at first it is akward eating dinner while your girlfriend eats breakfast )

[Rucati]

To be 100% honest, I'd probably have broken up with her if I were you.

She sounds like a bitch really, if I was ever with a girl who got mad at me for doing things I enjoy I certainly wouldn't stay with her.

[AceGoodheart]

this forum gets dumber by the millisecond. She's being immature and petty especially to attempt to get back at you when you haven't done anything to her in the first place. Anybody thinking there's a side here to pick probably thought both Bush and his dad were the best presidents ever. I get to see my gf far less than you and when shit like this comes up we talk/work it out. No @#%$&^ way should any significant other tell you not to do something you enjoy/love/are passionate about unless it is a threat to your relationship. END of discussion right there. For instance my gf loves dolphins and whales and wants to save them, I laugh my ass off about it but I'd still be the one helping to fund that love of hers so she can be involved. cesspool of answers in this thread ;-/ Absolutely shameful.

[Deleted]

I think you should go for the theater, it's with your friends after all and it's something you enjoy.

Out of personal experience, I'd like to add to that, don't take it for granted. You may have to cut in a bit on your gaming time or whatever (even if she's still/already in bed). This is the mistake I've made myself; I love to spend time gaming with friends. I did play a lot when my girlfriend was sleeping. Thing is, you might push her away by doing so. Don't underestimate the power of a simple hug at night (which I did and severely regret).

I think you could balance it out; have both the theater and a happy relationship.

[markos82]

I know guys should back other guys but tbh i think she is right..

You live together so i guess you plan family and life, if so then you should know that life is about sacrifices, she lets you play games, she lets you do many things as you said, but on a day thats free ( no work ) you decide to do something that will shorten that day you could spend together, i think thats wrong, i might be wrong, but tbh you need to make a choice, does the time spent with her ( small amout of time ) worth less then your passion. Also shouldnt she be your 1st passion?

[Spectral]

It seems to me that you two should work out your work schedules so that they align better if it's really that serious.

[DieFichte]

You live together so i guess you plan family and life, if so then you should know that life is about sacrifices

life in a relationship is about compromise not sacrifice, and these only get done when both people try for it. It seems she isn't even trying.

[Reeve]

I know guys should back other guys but tbh i think she is right..

You live together so i guess you plan family and life, if so then you should know that life is about sacrifices, she lets you play games, she lets you do many things as you said, but on a day thats free ( no work ) you decide to do something that will shorten that day you could spend together, i think thats wrong, i might be wrong, but tbh you need to make a choice, does the time spent with her ( small amout of time ) worth less then your passion. Also shouldnt she be your 1st passion?

Remember we're only talking about 56 hours here. She can suck it up and be supportive of her boyfriend.

[Dasffion]

Remember we're only talking about 56 hours here. She can suck it up and be supportive of her boyfriend.

What percentage of that is their total time together?