Would you let your girlfriend or wife hangout with a bunch of dudes from work?

[Deleted]

Yes, of course i would.

What kind of person thinks a partner would cheat given a chance... If your relationship has deteriorated to this point, why prolong the pain? That point aside, there's no need to be unreasonable...

You shouldn't control your partner, much less dictate the sex of those they want to meet - it reeks of sexism and just plain old insecurity.

Do partners cheat? Unfortunately yes, but you can't change that - it's life, you can however stop being so damn controlling

[Speaknoevil]

Firstly, I am pretty fucking sure that if I went out drinking with a bunch of WOMEN after work, the only thing I would get from my spouse is a week of angry stares and "what the fuck did you do?" And don't tell me that is uncommon from women. From anyone, for that matter.

The people in this thread are ridiculous because apparently the only two options are both extremes; either you lock down the spouse completely or you let her have freeroam while you naively play video games at home, right guys?

It's not uncommon, but people shouldn't get married if they don't trust each other not to fool around with other people.

Trusting your partner is one thing, being worried about them being slipped a pill is another.

Valid, becoming more valid if your partner is naive/trusting(lulredundant.)

[v2prwsmb45yhuq3wj23vpjk]

Firstly, I am pretty fucking sure that if I went out drinking with a bunch of WOMEN after work, the only thing I would get from my spouse is a week of angry stares and "what the fuck did you do?" And don't tell me that is uncommon from women. From anyone, for that matter.

The people in this thread are ridiculous because apparently the only two options are both extremes; either you lock down the spouse completely or you let her have freeroam while you naively play video games at home, right guys?

The scenario is of a highly binary nature. It's not like she can half-way go.

[Aziel]

For me it's entirely the opposite, my girlfriend will not go out without me to a party or club event, if I say I don't want to go she will say she is and then decide to stay home 5 minutes before she was supposed to leave.

If I go out with her, then she is more than happy to do her own thing at parties and talk to people by herself, just for whatever reason she won't go out alone.

I have been a little worried when she's gone out with a friend who dragged her out, but with an ex who managed to cheat on me 5 times in 6 months I think I get to worry a little sometimes, for anyone who says I should trust my new girlfriend... live through finding that out and tell me you don't have trust issues before you judge.

[Deleted]

I wouldnt say anything but I wouldnt be "completely fine" with it.

[vizzle]

It's not uncommon, but people shouldn't get married if they don't trust each other not to fool around with other people.

If you admit that it's uncommon then why are we making this about sex? If you admit that women get just as upset when their men go out with women (much less good-looking women) to drink then how in the world has this become about sex?

Throwing around the sexism card willy dilly is just triggerhappy these days.

[Speaknoevil]

If you admit that it's uncommon then why are we making this about sex? If you admit that women get just as upset when their men go out with women (much less good-looking women) to drink then how in the world has this become about sex?

Throwing around the sexism card willy dilly is just triggerhappy these days.

The OP gives the impression in this post and others of a disrespectful nature, when he implies that the decision is ultimately the man's it is no longer willy nilly card tossing.

[vizzle]

The scenario is of a highly binary nature. It's not like she can half-way go.

*You could meet up with her (depends on how long the event is)
*She could text you/message you every now and then (depending on how long they're out drinking. If it's just an hour after work then no message is fine, but if it's all night then there's reason to be informed).
*Depends also how often she does it

The scenario is as binary as trying to give a one-word definition to two sides of a political opinion. There are too many specific factors to say what would be best in the situation.

[Deleted]

What exactly do you intend to achieve by keeping her at home not letting her socializing with any man ever? Are you going to keep her in a dungeon lest she lay eyes on another man and find him more attractive and eventually leave you?

If someone cheats on you and fucks you over they're obviously wrong for you. Trying to keep a woman socially isolated from the opposite sex is not going to make them right for you.

nay i is not going to keep in her in dungeon yer sir!

wth man? and i only need her to gain my trust, well that would probs take around year atleast

and yes i think all my ex's been wrong for me(last one being 3 years), i think you dont understand the nature of female :/

[Gheld]

The OP gives the impression in this post and others of a disrespectful nature, when he implies that the decision is ultimately the man's it is no longer willy nilly card tossing.

I didn't get that impression at all.

EDIT:

As long as its not a total sausage fest, I don't see the problem with it.

I'd be unhappy if it was anything more than platonic/professional though.

How dare you! Men aren't allowed to have negative feelings about something a woman does, because that means he's controlling her!

[yurano]

As long as its not a total sausage fest, I don't see the problem with it.

I'd be unhappy if it was anything more than platonic/professional though.

[This name sucks]

No, I'm a possessive asshole.

[Hyve]

Some people here have serious trust issues. Sure, being cheated on is never a nice thought, but if you're a controlling jerk, then she is far more likely to take any chance she can to get out, and fuck the living soul out of whoever is more carefree.

Wanting to ensure your spouse is faithful is one thing, but some of the measures people are talking about here, is just insane!

[KCguy]

It's all about trust. Common sense really. If you trust them, it's all good, if you don't, that is where the "jealous" husband or "jealous" boyfriend falls into play.

[Halicia]

Some people here have serious trust issues. Sure, being cheated on is never a nice thought, but if you're a controlling jerk, then she is far more likely to take any chance she can to get out, and fuck the living soul out of whoever is more carefree.

Wanting to ensure your spouse is faithful is one thing, but some of the measures people are talking about here, is just insane!

Eh, there's trust issues, and then there's issues with the situation...

Like... a girl may *trust* her guy to go drinking at a strip club with his buddies and not cheat on her, but still have issues with the situation...

and likewise, a guy may *trust* his girl to go out for drinks with some 'work buddies', but still have issues with the situation...

most notably... are there other women from work there ? are other significant others going to be present ? is the guy welcome to attend ?

personally, i think it'd be odd to 'go out for drinks after work', but not say 'hey, why don't you see if your significant other who we haven't met can come?' if only to have someone to drive all these rowdy drunks home safely.

[Adam Jensen]

If I can't trust her enough to hang out with other dudes and not be faithful, there's something wrong with the relationship.

[Rad1um]

My fiancee doesn't go out after a dinner from work. Ex: A christmas dinner or Thanksgiving. You dont have a choice in the matter though. If she wants to and you tell her NO, are you prepared to live with the fact that she wanted to? Just let her do what she thinks is right.

Edit:: I just showed her your post and asked her:::::::

if she asked she wants to go no question about it. get the false sense of ownership out of your head because if you cage her long enough, she'll be too afraid to tell you later on and probably do shit behind your back. Another thing is, going to get drinks AFTER a dinner? What do you think a woman does alone(without her guy) with other men drinking? You think they're gonna shake hands and say goodnight? Talk to her and see where your relationship is going. If she tells you its JUST DRINKS then you HAVE TO take her word for it.

[sugarlily]

Lets say they had an event at work, and they all went out afterward to get some drinks. Would you let your girlfriend or wife hangout and drink with a bunch of dudes from work? Or would you trust her?

At least she wouldn't feel embarrassed by the fact that if she were out with you there would be zero tips given to servers/bartenders & these works buddies aren't as cheap & "frustrated" by it all like you are :P

[Maxilian]

Yes why not, if she cheats on me, that's mean:

1- I'm a really bad Boyfriend/husband

2- She's a bitch

and if any of the 2 happens that means that she will cheat on me sooner or later

[-Zait-]

Get drinks..? I don't have a bar in my kitchen...

yeah of course, I'd trust her.