If anyone is familiar with children/social services I need help please.

[The Riddler]

Long story short.

You are both minors and you have absolutely no legal rights whatsoever of any kind to do jack-diddly-squat.

Even IF (and I purposely stress that IF) you are what you say you are - you've still got no rights, no laws on your side, and no possible recourse until both yourself and the girl in question are over the age of 18. Period. End of story. Stiff upper lip. Bite the bullet. Keep your nose clean. Exercise patience. If this is a relationship that is more than just idiot teenage puppy love then TIME ALONE is going to be what makes it happen. No offense, but you really do sound like a person seeking for people to agree with and/or support a Romeo/Juliet story. I'm all for romantic love, but there's also a little thing called reality you have to deal with and a 16 year old girl running off with a 17 year old boy can only end badly.

And quite frankly, I severely doubt that any person at the age of 17 can afford their own apartment, utilities, and to purchase a brand new Mustang. You're either the luckiest 17 year old kid on the planet, or grossly exaggerating your earning power.

[Reg]

First of all, in regard to TN law and statutory rape, TN has a "Cinderella" law that allows a minor older than 15 to consent to a sexual relationship if the partner is less than 4 years older. In this case, the OP is only a year older and would never be subjected to any criminal charges. The only slightly related exception comes when the OP turns 18 and his girlfriend is still 17, and that charge is "corruption of a minor" and this could stem from a number of things (smoking, providing gf with cigarettes/porn/etc) but usually if the guardian of the gf wants to screw the bf's life up, they can almost always find a way to cite corruption.

Second of all, regarding the "no contact" order in place, this is typical in any situation where a minor is put under protective custody. While there may not be a specific person listed, there is at least usually a blanket order where certain people can be listed as exceptions rather than try to prevent contact with a number of (possibly unknown) people.

Good luck OP, this happened to me in the past, although it was just with a friend, not a gf. It was hard not being able to talk to my friend for 2 years...

lol Sorry, I just had to correct, you info is right but it's called a Romeo and Juliet law, Cinderalla law is about minors driving at night, so if you Google it you might get some weird information lol

And as far as the OP situation goes, I was in an abusive family, and I had to go through the entire process of emancipating myself from my parents. I had friends who were willing to take me in, but my parents demanded I remain part of the family, but once I went through the process, I was able to live with another "guardian".

[Auloria]

Her bio father has been in prison for 7 years and he's in there for life. 4 counts of child molestation, 1 count of rape, and beating his wife. Shes very sensitive which is another reason i want her back. shes been through alot and i don't really want her to go through this too =/ being under 18 everything is private apparently. I had no notice what so ever about the no contact order I was told by her mom. An aunt has them currently that's all i know it makes me feel better but it doesnt because i still cant talk to her. I don't know why i would possibly get hit with any charge since none of this has anything to do with me and i'm still underage myself. Thanks for the support

I really don't think marriage is in her best interest. She's had a rough childhood and she fled to you because she needed someone to protect her. What she desperately needs right now is some semblance of a normal childhood.

I know you are wigging out, but this is about what's best for her, not you.

[Sialanne]

I would have no problem getting married to her even if this wouldn't of happened. shes lived with me for almost 3 years it's not just because i miss her. You can't say just wait a year and 6 months with absolutely no contact with her until shes 18 to then find her again

---------- Post added 2013-06-10 at 01:03 PM ----------



I live in Tn. Yeah emancipation wouldn't be a option because this is something i have to try to do myself to get her. since i have no way to contact her because we have a no contact order

If you have a No Contact Order, DON'T FUCKING CONTACT HER!

That's the same as breaking a restraining order. You will end up in jail.

[Heedless One]

Don't listen to some of these people. Marriage is easy, all you do is go to the courthouse and BAM! you're married. You might need to get a license first or whatever, but it's easier than you might think.

The whole being-a-minor thing might be a problem though. I'm not sure what the laws are in getting married there in TN, but in my state you can get married at 16.

I mean, sure, marriage is a decent-sized commitment. But if things go sour you can always get divorced in a few months and start anew.

[Sorrior]

This sort of thing pretty much never fails to incite immense rage in me...I'm sorry you're having to go through this and to me this is just another case of a broken system...I actually have a bit of a past with how broken it is myself...

But yeah i REALLY hope you can get this sorted out but be careful....Alot of the laws these days will probably ruin your life no matter your age.

[Issalice]

Pretty sure there is nothing that can be done as you are both underage. I would suggest having your parents contact child services if they were willing to step in and take care of the children. That is a huge long shot, and you mentioned you have a no contact order I don't think they would allow that.

If she were to be emancipated and you two were to be married you would still have to bother be working and living in an environment that was stable enough to raise 4 children in. You would also have to be able to financially support those children.

Beyond having your parents contact cps I would suggest getting her mother on board. If she doesn't want to lose her kids she needs to get her shit together. Put whatever issues the two of you have aside. Try to help her get the home in order. There should be a court hearing (I'm assuming) to determine if she is a fit mother, or if the children need to be permanently removed.

[torment3d]

I have to add one more thing. I was in a situation like this as I said earlier so I did a lot of reading in the past because of it. Most states allow marriage at 16 with parental consent. ALSO, you guys are taking the marriage thing too seriously, he's not trying to get married FOR REAL to start a family and stuff, he's trying to free his girlfriend from the screwed up system. It costs like $50-60 to get married before a judge. Even with a no contact order, I'd see if marriage would fix the problem, and I'd say "get married no matter what law is keeping you both apart" and let them deal with it.

[StaeleAilar]

did the two of you live with your family? there might be some way to for them to get guardianship of her, or perhaps another one of her family members, do you have contact with a Aunt or Grandparent?

This would be my bet. Go wherever you need to with your parents, provided they agree, and apply for guardianship of her. I feel like im objectifying the poor girl in this instance... -_-

But yes this may be a way, though i am unfamiliar with how the law works over in America.

[Deleted]

You wanna marry her? Okay, answer these questions.

Do you have a home of your own?
If not, Why should your parents pay for you and your brides living costs?
If yes, do you have a stable job?
Does that job have a stable paycheck?
Can you support you and your spouse with that paycheck?
Can you pay rent and utilities with that paycheck?
Do you have means of transportation for you and your spouse?
Have you both finished school?
If one of you hasnt finished school, are one of you prepared to take on a possible second job or longer hours, in order to make sure that person finishes school?
Do you have an account or even a savings account?
Do you have any money saved up?

These are just a few.

Yeh don't look at this list... Geez what a load of cock.
Only one question here. Do you love each other?

Op: this is extremely twisted. It's noble for you to want to help her. Same happened to a friend of mine ages ago. At 18 she ran out as fast as she could. It's probably what is going to happen here too.

[Sorrior]

Yeh don't look at this list... Geez what a load of cock.
Only one question here. Do you love each other?

Op: this is extremely twisted. It's noble for you to want to help her. Same happened to a friend of mine ages ago. At 18 she ran out as fast as she could. It's probably what is going to happen here too.

I thought much the same myself man..And we wonder why almost only idiots are having children..Some people put WAY too much thought into matters that SHOULD be left up to instinct and emotion.

[Mormolyce]

Surprised they took a 16 year old, thought you were legally independent at that age. Guess it's different where you are.

Yeah I think emancipation is what you're looking for, although can you be emancipated from the state? Interesting question. Definitely contact your local social services or support groups.

---------- Post added 2013-06-12 at 05:35 AM ----------

First of all, in regard to TN law and statutory rape, TN has a "Cinderella" law that allows a minor older than 15 to consent to a sexual relationship if the partner is less than 4 years older.

I thought it was Romeo & Juliet laws? Cinderella was underage?

Did Cinderella even have sex?

[Sorrior]

Surprised they took a 16 year old, thought you were legally independent at that age. Guess it's different where you are.

Yeah I think emancipation is what you're looking for, although can you be emancipated from the state? Interesting question. Definitely contact your local social services or support groups.

It's 18 in the US and i think she can FROM HER family which in turn means that the state has no legal right to hold her anymore.

[Lovecrafts]

This sounds like an MTV reality show.....seriously....what?

[Sorrior]

This sounds like an MTV reality show.....seriously....what?

you shoulda seen a school i went to..I still remember being in art and right next door in the lunchroom all of a sudden we hear this lud chorus of "JERRY JERRY JERRY JERRY" and the security guards come in and we hear em say "THIS IS NOT THE JERRY SPRINGER SHOW"

BTW i am dead fucking serious was one fucked up school...

[Lovecrafts]

you shoulda seen a school i went to..I still remember being in art and right next door in the lunchroom all of a sudden we hear this lud chorus of "JERRY JERRY JERRY JERRY" and the security guards come in and we hear em say "THIS IS NOT THE JERRY SPRINGER SHOW"

BTW i am dead fucking serious was one fucked up school...

I'm expecting OP and his GF to be expecting soon, then it really will be an mtv reality show...