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  1. #741
    The Unstoppable Force THE Bigzoman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stir View Post
    I am aware of this. Unfortunately. My statement was not so much against your stance... Merely providing nuance.
    I think victim blaming is, indeed, horrendous (though I honestly can see how victim blaming would be suitable in the situation I described where I got punched in the face, however... But that example does not work for this situation at all).
    In this situation, the best you can make of it is: Stupid arse sends dick pic. Target of dick pic is (understandably) offended, and rejects the dick pic. Offender then goes on to harass the target. The target takes action by publicly shaming the offender. I call it quits, to be honest. She dealt with the situation succinctly, an therefore, I don't think she should be blamed, or he should be further trampled. It's her victory, so I don't think anyone should take that away from her...

    Well; apart from misogynists who seem to completely forget the event itself, and address only completely unrelated sexual inequality issues.


    Oh... If that happened to you, I do feel sorry for you.
    However, if you think that that sort of thing happening to you is a-okay, then I feel even móre sorry for you.
    While I think it's a illogical and indecent thing to do, So are other things that people seem to think is A okay for some reason or another. I wouldn't go as far as this event being a "rape culture" thing. Sexting is a rising indecency nowadays that both sexes partake in.

    I.E the girl from High school that thought I wanted to see bananas in her when I only hung out with her once.
    Last edited by THE Bigzoman; 2013-06-14 at 08:02 AM.

  2. #742
    Quote Originally Posted by Stir View Post
    I am aware of this. Unfortunately. My statement was not so much against your stance... Merely providing nuance.
    I think victim blaming is, indeed, horrendous (though I honestly can see how victim blaming would be suitable in the situation I described where I got punched in the face, however... But that example does not work for this situation at all).
    In this situation, the best you can make of it is: Stupid arse sends dick pic. Target of dick pic is (understandably) offended, and rejects the dick pic. Offender then goes on to harass the target. The target takes action by publicly shaming the offender. I call it quits, to be honest. She dealt with the situation succinctly, an therefore, I don't think she should be blamed, or he should be further trampled. It's her victory, so I don't think anyone should take that away from her...

    Well; apart from misogynists who seem to completely forget the event itself, and address only completely unrelated sexual inequality issues.


    Oh... If that happened to you, I do feel sorry for you.
    However, if you think that that sort of thing happening to you is a-okay, then I feel even móre sorry for you.
    :O

    I think we've finally managed to agree on something.

  3. #743
    Quote Originally Posted by Windfury View Post
    :O

    I think we've finally managed to agree on something.
    You misread me, I think... We've been pretty much agreeing most of the time... I was merely trying to nuance things.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bigzoman20 View Post
    While I think it's a illogical and indecent thing to do, So are other things that people seem to think is A okay for some reason or another. I wouldn't go as far as this event being a "rape culture" thing. Sexting is a rising indecency nowadays that both sexes partake in.

    I.E the girl from High school that thought I wanted to see bananas in her when I only hung out with her once.
    See, and that particular bit is the thing that gets everyone up in arms: She referred to it as 'perpetuating rape culture.' It's her opinion, and even though you might not agree with it, you should understand that 'rape culture' for feminists is EXACTLY the same thing as 'patriarchal male disposability' for masculinists: It's a big issue, but both sides of the coin tend to see only their OWN side of it. So while I disagree with her on her statement of perpetuating rape culture, she is ironically proven right about the rape culture thing when males start flinging shite at HER for taking action against something she found to be repulsive behaviour. And note that she only took that action after he ACTUALLY started harassing her; if he would have backed off after she rejected his dick pick, or gone back to normal, she would have let the topic dropped. We already know she wouldn't have pressed charges. Her response, then, was in regards to his behaviour AFTER the dick pic.

    So while the dick pic itself was not a perpetuation of rape culture, anyone who defends his behaviour afterwards IS perpetuating rape culture.

    In fact, when targets of unwanted sexual content such as yourself merely shrug upon receiving it, that in itself is perpetuating a culture where people can force such content upon others. While I wouldn't say you were sexually harassed by being sent the banana pictures, that doesn't mean that you should be okay with it either. As I said earlier, I have had many instances of people making unwanted advances, and the expectation is always that you just have to suck it up. Well; I think speaking up should be the new norm.
    Last edited by Stir; 2013-06-14 at 08:11 AM.

  4. #744
    @Windfury:

    Why did you include me in that list of people that you quoted even though i said, "If everything is as they are then he is a douche"? That is the mean reason why i despise feminists like you. You try so freaking hard to get your (sometimes valid, sometimes complete bullshit) point across that you shoot first and ask questions later. It does not matter to you that i agree that what he did was wrong (Although i also think what she did was wrong)

    Almost every single person that you quoted also said that his actions were stupid but also commended the girl for doing the stupid shit she does.

    My problem is arguing with a person on the internet, especially persons like you.

    Some of us have actually been raped so we don't appreciate when ignorant people like yourself and the lady in question lumps every single thing together as "rape culture".

    ---------- Post added 2013-06-14 at 03:06 AM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Stir View Post
    You misread me, I think... We've been pretty much agreeing most of the time... I was merely trying to nuance things.
    The problem is that you don't agree with him/her 100% so therefore she/he considers you as 100% disagreeing with her/him.

  5. #745
    Quote Originally Posted by Windfury View Post
    Sure - you're all holding him accountable, and nobody is blaming her for being harassed.
    aheartbeatchanged:

    Attention assholes: don’t sexually harass a girl when she can easily find you on Facebook and send your mom proof of your perpetuation of rape culture.
    Moral of the day? Don’t mess with me.
    She pretends to be some civil rights champion. This is why people got pissed at her. Not because she got harassed. Can you honestly not understand that?

  6. #746
    Quote Originally Posted by Ralgarog View Post
    Why did you include me in that list of people that you quoted even though i said, "If everything is as they are then he is a douche"?
    I included you because your immediate assumption, which you were happy to post up here, was that there must be something more to it that meant the woman was in fact in some way responsible. Literally the first thought you had was that she must be in some way responsible even if you don't yet have the evidence as to how. Do you honestly not see the problematic nature of making that kind of knee jerk assumption against victims?

    ---------- Post added 2013-06-14 at 08:18 AM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Cybran View Post
    She pretends to be some civil rights champion. This is why people got pissed at her. Not because she got harassed. Can you honestly not understand that?
    Are you literally completely blind? I just posted up 20 odd quotes of people saying the harassment was her fault.

    Not the comments she posted on her own personal blog later, the actual harassment.

    Stop pretending that isn't happening here. Everyone isn't doing it sure, but a significant number are.

  7. #747
    Quote Originally Posted by Windfury View Post
    I included you because your immediate assumption, which you were happy to post up here, was that there must be something more to it that meant the woman was in fact in some way responsible. Literally the first thought you had was that she must be in some way responsible even if you don't yet have the evidence as to how. Do you honestly not see the problematic nature of making that kind of knee jerk assumption against victims?
    ORRRRRRRRRRRRRRR Maybe i am not the type of person to believe every single thing that i see on the internet at first glance? It is problematic that your first knee jerk assumption is that i, and a few others (don't get me wrong we have some complete garbage in this thread) are blaming the victim. People like you trivialize an actual problem by projecting it onto people that do not fit the problem. Your type of "YOU ARE NOT 100% FOR HER, THEREFORE YOU ARE BAD!" creates a schism where people from the side lines look at our interactions and are like, "Well i better stay from the crazy feminists because if they even attack someone that agrees with them they are problem makers."

    You should be ashamed of yourself for being so destructive to your cause. Learn to pick your battles and choose your enemies and stop assuming that because someone does not agree with you 100% that they 100% disagree with you.

    Now: Even though i stated the exact reason why i made my comment (which is a valid reason. Later i learned that she did some searching on facebook and found who she think is the guy's mother) based on your track record i am certain that you will either completely ignore what i posted, OR you will pretend that i did not post a reason because it does not fall onto your needle thin perspective.

    ---------- Post added 2013-06-14 at 03:25 AM ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by Cybran View Post
    She pretends to be some civil rights champion. This is why people got pissed at her. Not because she got harassed. Can you honestly not understand that?
    No. She/He cannot understand that. A lot of new feminists have this false dichotomy set up in their mind where you are either 100% for them, or 100% against them. You agree on what matters but SORRY since you think her actions are uncalled for you are now a rape-apologist.

    P.S: Called it. Obviously because her cherry picked quotes do not 100% support the lady you, since you are probably male, are responsible for their actions because didn't you know males are all hive mind rapists?
    Last edited by Ralgarog; 2013-06-14 at 08:28 AM.

  8. #748
    Quote Originally Posted by Windfury View Post
    Nice victim blaming there.

    'If you're going to do X people are entitled to sexually harass you'.

    And people can't understand why she's linking the mentality many are displaying to this to rape culture ('if you're going to do X [short skirt, drink, go out on your own etc] people are entitled to rape you' - I'm sure we've all heard that before). Sure it's not as severe, but the logic behind it is pretty much exactly the same.

    Why aren't people holding the individuals doing the harassing accountable for their shitty behaviour instead? Why isn't the message that it isn't acceptable and ok ever? Why is consent in relation to sex so difficult a concept for some people?
    Yea actually, yes. It's not unreasonable to assume that if you are on a dating site, you will be trolled by creeps.

    Just like here. If you are going to post on this forum, expect assholes to fuck with you. Get it out of your head that you are protected and innocent and when it happens don't be shocked. Take a proactive stance. It does not make them rite to fuck with you, but your own naivety is what needs to change.

    Victim blaming? Harassing? Which one was harassing who? Who's the victim? I don't see that guy all over the internet, or that guy threatening the poster for not wanting to have sex with him?

    Why the fuck is a person on a date site, and suprised that people would act like that? OMFG creepers on a date site? that's new, shocking and completly rare. TOTALLY a not over the top reaction.
    "If you want to control people, if you want to feed them a pack of lies and dominate them, keep them ignorant. For me, literacy means freedom." - LaVar Burton.

  9. #749
    Quote Originally Posted by Ralgarog View Post
    ORRRRRRRRRRRRRRR Maybe i am not the type of person to believe every single thing that i see on the internet at first glance? It is problematic that your first knee jerk assumption is that i, and a few others (don't get me wrong we have some complete garbage in this thread) are blaming the victim. People like you trivialize an actual problem by projecting it onto people that do not fit the problem. Your type of "YOU ARE NOT 100% FOR HER, THEREFORE YOU ARE BAD!" creates a schism where people from the side lines look at our interactions and are like, "Well i better stay from the crazy feminists because if they even attack someone that agrees with them they are problem makers."

    You should be ashamed of yourself for being so destructive to your cause. Learn to pick your battles and choose your enemies and stop assuming that because someone does not agree with you 100% that they 100% disagree with you.

    Now: Even though i stated the exact reason why i made my comment (which is a valid reason. Later i learned that she did some searching on facebook and found who she think is the guy's mother) based on your track record i am certain that you will either completely ignore what i posted, OR you will pretend that i did not post a reason because it does not fall onto your needle thin perspective.
    Or how about I do what I feel is appropriate and completely ignore angry condescending men mansplaining to me about how to feminism correctly.

    I do not for one second care about your opinions about me. Deal with it. You made a shitty sexist assumption and it deserves a place with those quotes.

  10. #750
    Quote Originally Posted by Windfury View Post
    Or how about I do what I feel is appropriate and completely ignore angry condescending men mansplaining to me about how to feminism correctly.

    I do not for one second care about your opinions about me. Deal with it. You made a shitty sexist assumption and it deserves a place with those quotes.
    I don't think Ralgarog is male.

  11. #751
    Quote Originally Posted by Windfury View Post
    Or how about I do what I feel is appropriate and completely ignore angry condescending men mansplaining to me about how to feminism correctly.

    I do not for one second care about your opinions about me. Deal with it. You made a shitty sexist assumption and it deserves a place with those quotes.
    I'm sorry but i am 100% sure that you have some kind of mental disorder. You seem incapable of reason therefore it will be a waste of time trying to talk to you anymore about this. I kindly request that you remove my quote from your batch of quotes.

    I am at the point where i am pretty certain that most feminists are actually ingenious trolls and get a kick out of intentionally misunderstanding statements. Go ahead. Continue blaming everybody of rape culture and see where that gets you. Because you know, only females ever get raped, right?

    Edit: So
    Quote Originally Posted by Ralgarog View Post
    I need more back story before i am going to call victory for one side of the other. With the exception of her "Rape Culture" comment (Fun Fact: Having a Penis and a sex drive means you support rape culture: I.E: The meaning has been washed down so much that it almost has no meaning anymore) if he really did send her that dick pic out of the blue i support her actions.

    But judging on how she knows his mother i am willing to think that there is something else going on here.
    makes me a sexist male pig? Tell me, what doesn't make me a sexist male pig? Then yes, i am a sexist male pig. Also thanks for showing me the light: I no longer support her actions because chances are she is also like you and did it to make herself a victim, and get praise. Not to further her cause.
    Last edited by Ralgarog; 2013-06-14 at 08:41 AM.

  12. #752
    Quote Originally Posted by Cybran View Post
    I don't think Ralgarog is male.
    Hmm their writing style reads as male to me.

    Now you've got me wondering.

  13. #753
    Quote Originally Posted by Windfury View Post
    Hmm their writing style reads as male to me.

    Now you've got me wondering.
    Clearly, sexist.
    If you need to argue with people because they are male sounding..
    The arguments matter, not the sex of the person.
    "If you want to control people, if you want to feed them a pack of lies and dominate them, keep them ignorant. For me, literacy means freedom." - LaVar Burton.

  14. #754
    Quote Originally Posted by Ralgarog View Post
    I kindly request that you remove my quote from your batch of quotes.
    No. I've explained why it's up there and you haven't said anything to convince me it shouldn't be. Even with all the personal insults aside.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ralgarog View Post
    Because you know, only females ever get raped, right?
    Please show me where I said that?

    Oh wait you can't. Nice strawman.

  15. #755
    Quote Originally Posted by Windfury View Post
    Nice victim blaming there.

    'If you're going to do X people are entitled to sexually harass you'.

    And people can't understand why she's linking the mentality many are displaying to this to rape culture ('if you're going to do X [short skirt, drink, go out on your own etc] people are entitled to rape you' - I'm sure we've all heard that before). Sure it's not as severe, but the logic behind it is pretty much exactly the same.

    Why aren't people holding the individuals doing the harassing accountable for their shitty behaviour instead? Why isn't the message that it isn't acceptable and ok ever? Why is consent in relation to sex so difficult a concept for some people?
    I agree, but let me point something out here.

    There comes a time, when the well runs dry, a man just says "Fuck it." "I'll do it anyways."

    When I was watching "30 Days with Morgan Spurlock" they had a Gay Switch-a-roo, and a gay man grabbed a straight mans ass. Then said, after being confronted, "WTF man, why are you in a Gay Bar, if you're straight?"

    Both people have a point. Sure, just because I'm in a gay bar, even though I'm straight, doesn't mean I deserve to get my ass grabbed(Comparable to the woman getting the photo). Then at the same time, it's like "This is the day and age we live in."(The guy sending the photo)

    Because let's be honest now, dating, marriage, coupling, living together, bang buddies, and all that jazz. All boils down to compatibilities. Sex, at least in my eyes, is a major issue. So he is being up front and eye-gougingly honest. Which as a man, I can respect. Yet, I totally face palm his actions.

    Anyways, all that aside. His behavior has NOTHING to do with his mother. He is a full grown man. He makes his own choices. To mix his mother into the issue is bad form. It's like if I get into an argument with some random stranger, that happens to know my mom, and tells my mom? My mother would beat the shit out of you. Then laugh and have a beer with me. Over how fucking petty and childish a person would have to be, to go to someones mother, over a fucking naked picture.

    Fucking ridiculous.

  16. #756
    Quote Originally Posted by moogogaipan View Post
    Clearly, sexist.
    If you need to argue with people because they are male sounding..
    The arguments matter, not the sex of the person.
    /sigh

    I'm not arguing because they're male sounding.

    I made a comment in which I referred to them as a man. Which is why Cybran replied saying they weren't, and why I then replied to explain why I had described them as male.

    Really, is actually reading the thread that difficult?

  17. #757
    He obviously did something wrong, but if she forwarded it to his mother, doesn't that mean she can get sued or something?
    https://battle.net/recruit/R7HD2VJJ2K My heroes of the storm recruitment link. Looking for MOBA enthusiasts to play with. I also want a cool bike tbh.

  18. #758
    Quote Originally Posted by Ralgarog View Post
    Because you know, only females ever get raped, right?
    Males are victims too. Not as often.

    The perpetrators of rape and other sexual assaults are overwhelmingly male.
    "Nazis are like cats. If they like you, it's probably because you're feeding them." -John Oliver
    "How do Trump's people keep forgetting that they met with Russians?" -Trevor Noah
    Quote Originally Posted by TheOne01 View Post
    Read the rest of the thread. One is aloud to make an error..

  19. #759
    Quote Originally Posted by Windfury View Post
    /sigh

    I'm not arguing because they're male sounding.

    I made a comment in which I referred to them as a man. Which is why Cybran replied saying they weren't, and why I then replied to explain why I had described them as male.

    Really, is actually reading the thread that difficult?
    I'm reading you care about the sex of the person typing to you, or else you wouldn't have to "wonder" about it, because you in all your rightious indignation are concerned if a poster is male or not, which is kind of sexist to me.
    Why do you care? Because you aren't, 'the woman alone against all teh sexist males on mmoc"
    the joke is EVERYONE here agrees they are both total assholes and neither is rite. But..... lol
    Last edited by Tastyfish; 2013-06-14 at 08:46 AM.
    "If you want to control people, if you want to feed them a pack of lies and dominate them, keep them ignorant. For me, literacy means freedom." - LaVar Burton.

  20. #760
    Quote Originally Posted by Jokerfiend View Post
    Anyways, all that aside. His behavior has NOTHING to do with his mother. He is a full grown man. He makes his own choices. To mix his mother into the issue is bad form. It's like if I get into an argument with some random stranger, that happens to know my mom, and tells my mom? My mother would beat the shit out of you. Then laugh and have a beer with me. Over how fucking petty and childish a person would have to be, to go to someones mother, over a fucking naked picture.

    Fucking ridiculous.
    They way I took it was that in throwing the tantrum when she said no and told him his behaviour was inappropriate he acted childishly, and the appropriate way to manage a difficult child is to contact their parent.

    Looking at the conversation the guy continued to be belligerent towards her until she bought up his mother. In those circumstances I do not blame her at all for contacting her. Had he shown any respect for anything else she'd said maybe she wouldn't have done so, but he made it pretty clear that that was the one ting that might actually work and get the message across.

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