Women don't make sense. Help me make sense of this.

[Shaytan]

There, now it's fixed.

I've never met a guy who couldn't make up his mind.

Either he wants to sleep with the chick, or he doesn't. Either he wants the truck, or he doesn't.

I hate to say it but men are fairly simple to figure out, we have our hobbies, our likes, our dislikes, and we simply make up our mind and that's it. We might change it years later (Like someone who was against gay marriage, being for it now) but its not something we will flip flop on every week.

[Deleted]

She probably never saw you as boyfriend material, because the reason was never there.
Now that you came clean she started thinking:

1. Hes nice.
2. Hes funny.
3. Hes good looking (or not, dont know you :P)
4. etc.

"Hey, this might work out, lets give it a shot".

And there we are.

[Deleted]

I've never met a guy who couldn't make up his mind.

Either he wants to sleep with the chick, or he doesn't. Either he wants the truck, or he doesn't.

I hate to say it but men are fairly simple to figure out, we have our hobbies, our likes, our dislikes, and we simply make up our mind and that's it. We might change it years later (Like someone who was against gay marriage, being for it now) but its not something we will flip flop on every week.

I call this the illusion of the male mind.
We don't know what we want any more than women do, we just tend to be more stubborn about the decisions we make. The difference is usually that while a woman may change her mind before the result of her decision, men tend to only realise that they were wrong about what they wanted after the fact.

My point though, was that neither gender can be generalised like that - not knowing what you want is part of the human condition. We seek out new experiences all the time, often thinking that they are our deepest desires - only to discover that we simply wanted to experience that option, and once we have we're not that interested any more.

Disclaimer: Any statement containing the phrase "tend to" is based on anecdotal evidence and personal experience, and does not apply across-the-board.

[Mihalik]

I'm guessing this is a case of "mixed signals," since she blew him off when he expressed interest before, and now she's super interested.

@OP: Btw, I don't consider women to be confusing. We're very easy to understand. :-P Men, on the other hand...are strange. :-P

First of all cheers on your 666'th post. (Spawn of evil!)

We aren't strange, we just suffer from a circulatory problem. Nature gave us 2 heads to think with, but only enough blood to run them one at a time.

And I agree. After being blown of by a girl and friendzoned, when she suddenly decides to change her mind and go for you (especially if she comes on strong), it tends to catch us off-guard. Like a deer in the head lights of a car. We stare stunned and blindly into the light, clueless what to do next.

P.S. for OP.

Talking to her won't kill ya. Just please...don't do it over the phone, don't do it over facebook or some other crap. Do it in person. Watch her and listen to her and be frank. See where that leads ya.

[Wildtree]

Sounds like a classic case of Change Of Hearts.. There's nothing confusing, nothing that doesn't make sense.

You are on the winner street.
She needed time to deal with the new situation. To think it over, to look into herself. Rather by accident you gave her that time. That was the winner move right there.
For all you have to do now is to go along with it, and let everything happen naturally.
Just don't make it a complicated matter with her, don't try to "talk about it" again with her...

[Deleted]

Fixed the quote to highlight the essentials.

But no, seriously, she was drunk and in the moment and you DIDN'T take action? I thought you liked this girl.

Taking advantage of someone being drunk is really low, thinking it's fine is being creepy.

[Eldar45]

I am not saying that you should take advantage of a drunk girl, but being drunk doesn't doesn't make her into some super slut or give her feelings for you. Being drunk makes her lose her inhibitions about those feelings.

Tread carefully, do nice things for her a lot and ease her into a relationship. That is my advice.

[Perfectdoll]

Talk to her. Simple conversation "Hey, when I told you how I felt about you, you didn't feel the same way - but then we made out at the club and now you're flirting with me. Do you want to give it another go, go on a date sometime?" Simple as that. If you don't feel like being that open about it, just skip the first sentence and just ask her out on a date. Make it clear it's a date, if she says yes, it's pretty obvious she's changed her mind.

OP: This is the best advice you're going to get. I suggest you take it.

Also, friend-zoning? Let me quote you a meme: "Girls aren't machines where you put in friendship coins and sex comes out." Friend-zoning is complete bullshit and perpetuated by guys who can't judge their personal relationships with girls right.

[pucGG]

I guess she changed her mind.

Why is this thread still going on?

[Stir]

Honestly?
It sounds to me like you're 'reserve guy.'

Here's how that works: Guy has feelings for girl. Girl doesn't reciprocate those at first because there's plenty of fish in the sea. After a while of being single, the guy becomes more interesting. She makes her move on guy.

Do with my opinion as you will, of course.

[Deleted]

Seems she changed her mind, I'd say go with it but try not to get too excited in case you might get hurt, or you could just talk to her and ask, don't see what's the problem with that.

[Kuniku]

just be blunt, ask her what she wants, tell her what you still want, see if that is on the cards. Explain that you don't want to take her flirting the 'wrong way' and act innappropriately upon it and ruin your friendship etc etc

[Thelxi]

Girls get lonely (desperate) and change their mind frequently. It's still not a great idea to get with a girl that initially rejected you, but who knows go for it if you want to.

[owbu]

if she continued being intrested after sobering up, chances are you have a chance now. Dont wait too long. At some point she will decide that its not worth ruining your friendship and that her feelings were probably nothing and so on.

[RaoBurning]

She told me she doesn't have feelings for me, and now she's doing these things. Help.

Women...they do things, sometimes. The things they do don't make sense. They don't make sense because there's no rationale behind the actions. We, as menfolk, try to find the reasons behind the actions and, to our consternation, there are none. To cope with this discovery, we pretend women are mysterious and shit. But in reality, they're just making it up as they go along, like the digits of pi.

Humor aside, the best thing you can possibly do for yourself is to ask her directly.

"Hey, there's been a shift in our dynamic recently. You said once that you don't view me as anything more than a friend, but recent events contradict that claim (explain the pet names and such, maybe leave out the drunk making out. Don't want to make her feel too on the spot). We need to (don't ask, tell. Assertiveness is important) talk about what's changed between then and now."

Or something like that. Maybe you'll have a nice mature conversation about how her feelings have changed and go from there. Maybe she'll feel super insulted that you didn't figure out you're her new boy from the "obvious clues," as I'm sure she might say. Or maybe she'll be totally embarrassed and not talk to you forever (re: a few days. Or forever; who can guess).

It's a gamble, but I think it's the right way to go. Uncertainty is never fun.