Need help. Need to choose between paying £10,000 or a family member potentially dying

[Psynyx]

10k is quite a bit for a 22 year old.

Really? An automobile costs what 7-15k for a half way decent car? Yes, I know you can get cheaper cars. A college education costs what 25-40k? 10,000 isn't very much money at all and being melodramatic saying it will ruin you for life or even a large part of your life at 22 is just silly.

[Deleted]

Id do neither. Id confront him and ask him to pay the dept first, if he refuses, report the fraud. If he is unable to do that at the moment and I had the money, Id ask him to sign a legally binding document so I could collect it at later date unless hes homeless or something and it's apparent that he will never be able to pay.. then some jail time and reeducation might actually be good for him.

Then again, my dad would never do something like that so it's hard to say what I might do if that was actually the case. Still family means nothing unless they actually act like a family. Mine has always been there for me in a pinch so I'd do almost anything for them but if they had abandoned me or used me, they could rot in a prison, maybe theyd learn from it..

[IIamaKing]

Your father is a piece of shit for doing something like that to his child and deserves NONE of your care or sympathy.

[Deleted]

report him.

[yetgdhfgh]

Talk to your dad about this

Talk to family members so you dont need to carry this burden on your own

go to a debt specialist to see about somehow shrinking the debt or making easy to pay off plans

Or just report his ass and tell him to man up and accept responsibility

[ovm33]

I personally think I would talk to my Dad first. Find out exactly WHY he took the debt out in your name. Was he trying to keep your family from being evicted from your house and had to come up with some cash fast? Did he use it all on hookers and blow? To me, the reason would be important.

You said he came clean to you about it, there's obviously some guilt. So I would try to get him to pay it back on his own before all else. Assuming he is flat out unable to do it then go from there. If he is flat out unwilling to do it, go from there. Don't mistake me, by thinking that I believe defrauding your own child is an acceptable type of behavior.

Sending your pops to the pokey - is a bridge that you're not just burning down, but blowing it the fuck up. I would go down that road as a last resort. I would even pay the debt myself before I sent my Dad to jail. But my Dad and I have a great relationship and I know he wouldn't do such a thing unless he absolutely had to. I guess in the end, it really depends on how much you value your relationship. Is it worth 60k?

[Binary Speaker]

I love my father. But if I found out he did this I would report him and clear my name. Its not fair to you that he did this. Though I would only report him if he refused to work with me/pay off the debt himself. And I would tell him so.
Honestly OP I would weight your options and pick the one that will benefit you the most. I know that sounds cruel but your father made his bed.

[lupii]

Report it. He's scorned you and is essentially going to ruin you. As much as you may love him, he'll take you down if you don't. =/

[Zoranon]

A difficult situation surely, but there is one obvious thing you should do first: Ask your dad to repay the debt, if you have a functioning relationship, he should agree to do so.

Failing that, well you have to ask what you love more: your dad, or that 10K. Because chances are that if you report him and even if he does not commit suicide, you wont be on speaking terms for quite some time (or possibly forever).