Is it inevitable for a male and female friend to become romantically involved?

[Deleted]

I've a great relationship with my cousin for years now. It would be strange if I, at some point would fall in love with her.

[Trakanonn]

This is entirely circumstantial...

If they LIVED together, are single, attracted to one another in any way whatsoever, id say there is a 99.9% chance they get romantically involved.
If they see each other once a week for coffee/drinks of course the odds go down.

you got to specify.

[Deleted]

I think this discussion excludes family,homosexuals,aliens and/or your own mother

[Lynarii]

We are talking about two heterosexual people, one male and the other female having a friendship. Where exactly does homosexuality enter this discussion? I believe this is more of the rule rather than the exception. A heterosexual guy having a completely platonic friendship with a heterosexual girl is the exception here I believe.

I know heterosexuality was expected to be inferred from the OP. My point is really that to even start to argue that romance is inevitable you already have to start adding a bunch of conditions. Another one... I'm a married heterosexual man. My mother-in-law is a married heterosexual female. We're friends. If you came up to me on the street and started insinuating that there's a hidden romantic attraction there, I'd probably punch you in the face. =) If you insinuated that I was romantically attracted to my sister (also a married heterosexual female that I'd consider a friend) I'd punch you in the face a second time. Etc...

I can maybe agree that it is hard to have a completely platonic friendship if you start with the setup of two single unrelated heterosexual people of a similar age who find each other sexually attractive and socially compatible and... get my point?

[NewOrleansTrolley]

No, but that's only because the question is worded specifically. Are you asking us whether they will get involved? No, of course not.

But I think one friend will eventually like the other friend. Mostly always, it's the guy wanting to be involved with the woman. That stuff always happens! Unless he isn't into women or he's too stupid to realize why the friend zone is pointless. One exception is if they were friends since like chidlhood or something.

[Shudder]

Did you stop to think of people who are homosexual before asking this question? Cause either you didn't think of that or you worded the question poorly.

Why would he? He doesn't care or he would have included it. You're welcome to make your own poll with homosexual choices.

[Deleted]

Likely. I ended up marrying my best friend after years of friendship and watching each other date other people...

[Gemini Sunrise]

Likely. I ended up marrying my best friend after years of friendship and watching each other date other people...

Yeah, that happens. The question is though: did YOU BOTH want it, or did you feel forced into it? That should answer that question rather cleanly.

[Deleted]

I think this discussion excludes family,homosexuals,aliens and/or your own mother

Hey, don't be racist!

What if someone's actually in love with an alien?

[TheDangerZone]

Wow, it seems like everyone responding to TEHPALLYTANK is massively missing the point.

Which is, if the possibility for attraction was all that was needed for the inception of romantic feelings, as to call it "inevitable"; the homosexual people wouldn't be able to have friends of the same gender, since it also corresponds to their sexuality's target.

So no, it is not an inevitability for anyone, regardless of gender and sexuality.

[Lynarii]

Why would he? He doesn't care or he would have included it. You're welcome to make your own poll with homosexual choices.

The reason why you should think about it is that homosexuality is one of a LOT of reasons why two people of opposing genders might be friends without ever being romantically interested. It's brought up to point out how silly it is that the reason people say something like that /will/ happen is because they completely ignore every single reason why it might /not/ happen.

It's like arguing that if you drop a bowling ball on earth it will float upwards, as long as you don't count gravity.

[Deleted]

yes denying it makes u look like a fool

[Deleted]

Yeah, that happens. The question is though: did YOU BOTH want it, or did you feel forced into it? That should answer that question rather cleanly.

I forced him to do it... mwahhaha *evil grin*

nah, we both wanted it.

[Shudder]

The reason why you should think about it is that homosexuality is one of a LOT of reasons why two people of opposing genders might be friends without ever being romantically interested. It's brought up to point out how silly it is that the reason people say something like that /will/ happen is because they completely ignore every single reason why it might /not/ happen.

It's like arguing that if you drop a bowling ball on earth it will float upwards, as long as you don't count gravity.

Because reading comprehension is hard. We all know what the OP meant. It's like a heterosexual person going to gay pride and complaining there isn't enough hetero representation. This thread was obviously meant to discuss hetero male and female relationships.

[Deleted]

I know heterosexuality was expected to be inferred from the OP. My point is really that to even start to argue that romance is inevitable you already have to start adding a bunch of conditions. Another one... I'm a married heterosexual man. My mother-in-law is a married heterosexual female. We're friends. If you came up to me on the street and started insinuating that there's a hidden romantic attraction there, I'd probably punch you in the face. =) If you insinuated that I was romantically attracted to my sister (also a married heterosexual female that I'd consider a friend) I'd punch you in the face a second time. Etc...

I can maybe agree that it is hard to have a completely platonic friendship if you start with the setup of two single unrelated heterosexual people of a similar age who find each other sexually attractive and socially compatible and... get my point?

Of course there are rules. Take your mother-in-law for example. She is a person that is "forced" upon you, she came with your girlfriend, that was the package deal. It's most likely not a person you would seek out and start a friendship with on your own accord. I have loads of those female friends as well. They are either my friends girlfriends or maybe their mothers or my mother or her friends etc. They aren't people I would expose myself to where they not forced on me due to my various other friendships.

Now people that I do expose myself to on my own accord are people I find interesting. If I find a girl interesting enough to start a friendship with then the chances are astronomically huge that I find that same person very suitable as a partner. Why wouldn't an interesting girl be a suitable partner for a single heterosexual guy? Isn't that what most people look for their entire life, an interesting partner? That is why I believe the way I do.

[Xilurm]

Yeah, that happens. The question is though: did YOU BOTH want it, or did you feel forced into it? That should answer that question rather cleanly.

How exactly can you be forced to fall in love again?

[Lynarii]

Do keep in mind that I'm only speaking as to the inevitability of becoming romantically involved. I am also of the belief that your spouse /should/ also be a friend, it's truly depressing to hear people talk about their significant other like a punishment that has been afflicted upon them. I think everyone would be a hell of a lot happier if they married people they truly liked spending time with, over people that they guess they can tolerate in a pinch.

So if you want to start a romance with a friend, go for it. But never feel like you are obligated to or that friendship means that there must be something more just secretly waiting. Plenty of people are friends just because it's nice to have friends.

[Rukentuts]

How exactly can you be forced to fall in love again?

Gemini's point exactly.

[Deleted]

Hey, don't be racist!

What if someone's actually in love with an alien?

But are you sure there are female and male aliens? Maybe they don't have a gender or perhaps they're hermaphrodites. Too much uncertainty :>

[Rukentuts]

But are you sure there are female and male aliens? Maybe they don't have a gender or perhaps they're hermaphrodites. Too much uncertainty :>

Maybe they can be like certain species on Earth and change sex if the situation calls for it.