If adopted, would you seek out biological parents?

[Zantos]

So, I saw yet another story about a women who "found her family". I say that because to me, your family is the ones who love you most in this world and who have always been with you. I don't understand the mentality to find their biological parents. I mean, you have two people who raised you like their own. Gave you everything you need, loved you, and yet you wander about the ones who gave you up "for reasons unknown". I can understand needing to know for medical reasons, but other then that I am just dumbfounded. Then the media makes a big deal out of it. I mean really? Its news that she found her birth mother? I don't know. If I found out I was adopted yesterday, I highly doubt I would go and find my birth parents at all.

[Zogarth]

I most likely would try to find out in some way. I would not like travel around the world to look for them, but i would call where i was adopted and stuff like that just to meet them. The main objective would be to ask if there was anything medical i should know, and also if i had any other relatives just our of curiosity.

[Tradewind]

Probably, if only to find out why.

[Deleted]

Right now i would say no, but ofcourse i can't say how i'd feel if i was adopted, I think i'd probably be curious.

[Deleted]

No, if they abandoned me, they're not my parents, why seek them? Not only that but I also know that it doesn't matter why they did it, I wouldn't be able to forgive them anyway so why open up old wounds.

[shadowfyre27]

As someone who has been through that, I can say yes without a doubt. Although I only found my mother when I had finally found her and met her for the first time in 21 years it's hard to describe the feeling you have. There were tons of questions I had like most people who go searching for their biological parents, but it was also an extremely emotional thing. I was able to learn more about who I was, what my heritage was and so much more.

[Tradewind]

I'd like to change my vote to Yes (Medical Reasons)...specifically Organ Donation.

[The One Percent]

No, my family would be those who invested their time to raise me. Unless my biological parents sought me, I wouldn't bother looking.

[Rapti]

I dont know. Depends how my life would be. Prolly wouldnt care too much about them - just the same as they.

[NoRest4Wicked]

I was adopted on birth by my grand parents. I grew up calling my biological mother my sister and my biological grand parents mom and dad. I found out around 13, and around 19 I wanted to reach out to my biological father. 6 years later, I don't really talk to him except an email here and there, but I'm happy I got in contact with him. I just needed to know.

[Scillion]

I've never understood why people do this. Seems disrespectful to your new parents. The biological parents may have had their reasons to give me up, but I wouldn't care. They made a choice, and I'd like to keep it that way. The way I see it, we have nothing in common, as they didn't bring me up.

[StayTuned]

Since I am not adopted I really cannot answer this question to the fullest. I'd say yes, probably, just to know why. But maybe I'd be so angry at them for giving me away that I wouldn't care.

Tough question, really.

[Moistmuffins]

I like the people who aren't adopted saying things along the lines of screw them why should I care they gave me up.

OT: My aunt and uncle adopted a child because my aunt is sterile, and when she grew up they eventually told her. She was a little surprised but nothing major and asked if the family could help find her biological parents. We all chipped in so they could meet up and talk about heritage, health issues, reasons why, etc. She was really grateful and so were her biological parents. Since then she sees them about once a year and talks to them a little more, but beyond that my Aunt and Uncle are still her real mother and father and she refers to them as such. So if I were to be in that situation I would probably want to know as well.


Seriously how can you be so bitter about a situation you haven't even been in that you've based on weird assumptions?

[Deleted]

Not really, if I was adopted the man and woman that adopted me would be my parents. And I would have no desire to have 2 more.

[Maxilian]

Not really, if I was adopted the man and woman that adopted me would be my parents. And I would have no desire to have 2 more.

These, unless i realize that my adoptive parents are assholes

[shadowfyre27]

I like the people who aren't adopted saying things along the lines of screw them why should I care they gave me up.
Seriously how can you be so bitter about a situation you haven't even been in that you've based on weird assumptions?

No offense to those of you who are commenting but were raised by your biological parents, but, the sad truth for a great many people that have been raised by adopted parents when they find out they were adopted it can be a bit of a shock and raises a great many questions. Some people are able to go on living without wanting to know the answers to those questions but many are like me and search out our birth parents for those answers. I have been in support groups for people for were raised adopted or in foster care and the sad truth is that those who knew all along they were adopted like myself we have what I would best describe as a longing for answers.

It's really hard to put yourself in the shoes of someone who grew knowing the people who raised you and loved you and cared for you aren't your birth parents. For myself, I grew thinking did I do something wrong?, was it something I could have changed? Did they not love me enough? Adopted parents don't always know the answers to the questions that a child may have regarding where they came from or why they are raised by someone other than their birth parents. I acted out horribly as a child because I struggled to understand my situation and deal with the feelings questions I had inside that couldn't be answered.

To the people commenting that they would think of the people who raised them as their parents, I did and still do think of them that way, I still call them mom and dad and they understood and supported me when I said I wanted to know who my birth parents were. They weren't hurt by it at all, they even went with me the first time I met my mother to support me. Again no offense to anyone but, you can't really imagine the pain that comes from knowing the people that raised you weren't your birth parents. Also it's not always the birth parents choice to give up their child. I eventually learned I wasn't given up by choice but was removed from my parents. So there isn't always a choice in the matter for the birth parents.

[Lumocolor]

I'd ask myself 1 question.

Is there an up side to doing so?

If i have a good life, a home, a spouse, some rugrats and have a fine life financially i don't see why i would go look for strangers that have a chance of being nothing but trouble. If you were given up for adoption chances are the people that gave you up weren't filthy, stinking rich, so there is no upside if you're already doing well and happy.

My aunt was adopted by my grandparents when she was 3 and at 57 she has no intention of ever looking for her biological parents, she was well treated and was part of a good family and now she has a great life and family of her own and sees no reason to go looking for people that could end up just being trouble and trying to mooch off what she's made of herself.

Edit: My grandparents always told my aunt that they had no problem with her looking for her bio parents if she ever wanted to and they offered to help her with any information they had about where she came from. She still never wanted to know.

[Puck]

Again no offense to anyone but, you can't really imagine the pain that comes from knowing the people that raised you weren't your birth parents.

My Dad was adopted and he never went and looked for his biological parents. As far as I'm aware he never felt "pain" that his parents weren't biological.

[Maruka]

No, fuck them.

[Volitar]

No, even if I wanted to (which I don't) I'm stubborn as hell and would never actually let my self do it.