That is why I like leveling a tank as new toon. I can go on my own pace, which is usually not slow but also not fast. Even being an experienced player, I like exploring the dungeons, I don't skip trash, and I also don't rush to the last boss.
Very rarely I have seen complaints about my speed. If a DPS starts to pull trash himself, I warn him, and if he continues I let him die once, so he knows his place. I don't overdo this jerky behavior as well, and the DPS usually starts following me after he realizes I know what I am doing.
It is very common finding shitty healers, but since I am experienced, I rarely die. I don't yell at them and paciently wait for them to recover before next pull.
Sometimes, I even find groups that are willing to to an entire run of BRD. It is great reviving those newbie days.