I'm 21 and want to have sex with a 42 year old.

[RapBreon]

Ethical relativism then or...? Because that has its own problems.

I was mostly just making a statement, morality is defined by the culture. Descriptive moral relativism with meta-ethical leanings. All that matters is perspective, other factors of course can influence that culture (usually other cultures) and hence their sense of morality. Being said, I do live in a society with prescribed cultural notions and ideals. Furthermore because I don't like being stabbed while I sleep, I'm happy to decry some behaviours for my personal benefit and beliefs.

The problem I find with pure ethical relativism is that it makes it hard to govern in a multi-cultural world, you can't really prescribe behaviours that you won't accept without undermining it and clearly everybody doesn't accept the same things as moral, so it'd basically collapse under its own weight. I'd say it works fine for small isolated groups however. The only reason we get to designate what is moral and immoral is because we have the power (does that make power the only morally positive thing?). If the Nazis won (Godwinlololo) I'm sure killing certain groups of people would be a moral experience.

It's a useful intellectual tool rather than a guidance tool.

I think it's doable. You shift focus off of blaming people to focusing on ways of altering behavior towards more constructive and desirable outcomes. It's why I'm in favor of purely rehabilitative consequences for people who break the law. I'm not terribly interested in the concepts of morality or immorality, nor am I particularly concerned with concepts of guilt beyond determining whether an act was an accident or not and whether or not the outcome that occurred was anywhere near the orbit of outcomes that could reasonably be expected to occur. I think the fixation on immorality, punishment, blame, etc are pointless distractions, especially if it turns out we ultimately don't have free will.

Now you're talking. First a quick addendum; 'come down hard' implies punishment, bad wording, not what I meant. I should mean targeted for 'X' solution as it's the easiest circumstance to actually prove that this individual isn't functioning properly in relation to our societal expectations. When I respond quickly I fail to temper my responses. I personally think the punitive mentality doesn't work, I mean America's recidivism rates and crime rates are evidence of this. Not to mention the hysteria it breeds. Either way it requires holding someone accountable to 'fix them' anyway.

As for doable, I agree, but you're not going to like successful examples of it. It's strongly entrenched in moral language. America/Australia/UK all have a punitive mind-set, the liberal notion that people won't commit crime because they fear punishments. Finland's mind-set is strongly entrenched in giving offenders a moral education, the idea being they won't commit a crime because it is fundamentally 'immoral'. In this sense they're kind of working towards a hivemind-esque ideal, built upon community and fostering loyalty to the people you share a community with. But, they back it up, their prisons are legitimately nice places and they let inmates out (under conditions) of prison (sometimes on their own) for up to a couple of days and numerous other tactics designed to educate.

It would require a complete reworking of Western mentality, it might come, but it'll be a generational thing at least (hence me saying currently). I mean just look at the responses on this forum, sometimes you just...wonder.

- - - Updated - - -

If you suppress them and they still exist, I see how that can be bad for you. When I said I was suppressing them though, I meant that I was basically eliminating the feeling entirely. If I got angry, I immediately stopped and controlled my breathing, redirected my thoughts, etc. If I felt sad, I immediately redirected my thoughts to a more neutral things and basically just imagined the physical sensation of lifting weights.

It's beginning to look like I'm targeting you now. Butting in on a conversation that wasn't mine, but I'd like to add anyway :P.

I'm not saying I know you better than you know you, but you seem treatment complaint. There are people who are treatment resistant, basically when they employ the exercises given to them (which are essentially the one's you have used), they have enormous difficulty seeing it through to completion. Either it has no effect (the negative thoughts just overpower the remedying thoughts), or in severe cases a physiological response occurs preventing them from thinking rationally (usually extreme panic). That or they're attempt these exercises to exorcise the panic in the first place. Thinking rationally while in a state of fight-or-flight panic is fairly difficult.

[Cosmic Janitor]

I'm still wondering, is she hot? If so, shit happens right?

I'm still wondering if you just think the OP is a troll or would you actually give such advice?

[Gandrake]

Age is just a number baby

but honestly to me just sounds like some crazy shit you just thought up... not a lot of single moms out there who actually give a fuck about doing their job right that need or want to have a fling with a guy or want a lot of guys just walking in and out of their life. maybe if you were like, the really jacked indian guy mowing her lawn without a shirt on in the middle of summer... but i don't think that this is the case

[Mormolyce]

So we're up to like 40 pages of people responding to the title and not reading the OP where he makes it obvious that she has a boyfriend and two kids and has shown no romantic interest in him, he's made no move on her and this is all in his head. He also has had no previous relationships.

Not to mention the extreme likelihood that it's a troll to begin with.

[Ginantonicus]

If you like her go for it. When it comes down to it you are not forcing her to do anything. If she wants to put her relationship at risk that is her choice.

[Cosmic Janitor]

So we're up to like 40 pages of people responding to the title and not reading the OP where he makes it obvious that she has a boyfriend and two kids and has shown no romantic interest in him, he's made no move on her and this is all in his head. He also has had no previous relationships.

Not to mention the extreme likelihood that it's a troll to begin with.

Doesn't really matter. The OP is just the back story or the general framework for the discussion. It's a discussion about morale first and foremost.

[OxiDiE]

Pound it out, no doubt.

Best Quote ever

[yurano]

Age doesn't matter, but ... homewrecker...

[Gandrake]

it aint homewrecking if the guy isn't living with her

[Cosmic Janitor]

it aint homewrecking if the guy isn't living with her

Which is very likely after 13 years .