Do you believe in prenuptial agreements?

[PuppetShowJustice]

She stated that she wouldn't want to marry someone who wanted a prenuptial agreement because that means the person isn't completely devoted and is already preparing for the worst.

Now I ain't sayin' she's a gold digger...

but I can't imagine why you wouldn't want to cover your own assets. Sometimes marriages fail. There's no reason not to account for that.

[slickwilly]

In the world of magic and unicorns a prenup is not needed. It's foolish not to get one. If he/she don't like it then tuf chit.

[Deleted]

Now I ain't sayin' she's a gold digger...
but I can't imagine why you wouldn't want to cover your own assets. Sometimes marriages fail. There's no reason not to account for that.

If you're totally against a prenup, you're basically saying that you are looking forward to taking some money with you if you leave.
"You're not fully devoted yada yada yada"...that's just nonsense.

[Thetruth1400]

She stated that she wouldn't want to marry someone who wanted a prenuptial agreement because that means the person isn't completely devoted and is already preparing for the worst. She thinks if you don't see yourself spending the rest of your life with the person without doubt why bother getting married.

What do you think of prenuptial agreements?

Prenuptial agreements are single handedly the best thing that exists when it comes down to marriage. They're in place to basically state what's going to happen in the worst case scenario and what both parties expect out of the marriage. There is no reason, outside of wanting to be deceitful to the other party, in which they're not a good idea.

That last line is the biggest concern I'd have with things. She thinks "Without a doubt" or else don't even bother. It's those kinds of extreme black and white situations that are her problem. So what's to say 10 years down the line one of them changes personalities due to stress, life choices, etc. If you're no longer in love with who that person has become, it can come down to one person taking advantage of the other. Instead, with a prenuptial agreement, that situation is laid out.

For example, say in the prenuptial, it says something about if the other party files for divorce, it can't be on a list of grounds as the reason. Say cheating isn't one of those reasons and one of the parties cheats. In the end, the other party can now file for divorce on that ground of cheating, and the agreement is invalid.

If you truly love someone and plan to spend the rest of your life with them, there's no reason a prenuptial is bad. If however you are deceitful, or think your partner might be, you need to reevaluate things before even going forward with the marriage in the first place.

[Balazaar]

Since you can make the terms of a pre-nup anything you want there really isn't any reason not to have one. You can set conditions such as if a spouse cheats that spouse's assets are not protected, etc. Conditions for abuse ... coma, whatever. Even a pre-nup that lapses after 10 years would protect against get rich quick gold diggers.

[Tastyfish]

My Bf and I are considering getting married and I am totally about one. I Have a lot of things that are expected for him to keep his hands off of, Family things, that cannot change into his entitlement to own, and that is just how it has to be. lol, if that makes any sense.

[Eliot123]

Yup. My sister is supposed to get married soon and she'll try to get her future husband to sign it, we have a family business that we will inherit one day and it would be rather bad if, in case they divorced one day, her husband got a part of that.

I won't be getting married due to certain reason (unless I move to a different country) but if I were, I'd totally get one.

[kendro1200]

Both are right, technically speaking.

His Girlfriend is right to think that, because if you are planning for the worst, then why are you getting married? At the same time, it's stupid to pretend bad things don't happen and plans change.

Simple rule of life: plan for the worst, wish for the best. Why do I have a set of tools, oil, spare tire, AAA membership, jug of water and some various other fluids in the trunk of my car even though I take care of it and submit it to regular maintenance? Because if something bad happens I'd like to have options available to me, and not be at the complete mercy of the charity of others. If a SO questions why their future spouse wants a prenup, and takes it as a lack of confidence, I'd actually question that SO, because only people who want to take advantage of another would take offense to a prenup. Why should having a prenup matter if it's not going to be used, unless part of your reasoning for being with your future spouse was an expectation of being far better off after things went south than if you had not been with them. Of course I'm fairly biased in the matter. My mother took all but a couple suitcases of clothes, and a few boxes of childhood keepsakes from my dad in their divorce (he didn't cheat on her or anything, in fact it was only a few weeks after he was out of the house but months before the divorce was actually finalized that she had a 'boyfriend' already staying at the place). My dad lost a lot to a woman who took custody over children, not because she wanted to raise them, but because she could use them to guilt him into giving her even more money, and long past his legal obligation.
If I were to ever get married, and that's a fairly big 'if', there is no way I'd go into it without a prenup, where I get to keep my stuff and the kids.
I've seen friends go through an experience similar to what my dad went through, although they've fought back and kept more than the shirts on their backs, and kept the kids. That is my polarizing experience though, prenups are good, because I have yet to see a marriage fall apart without one that didn't royally screw over the guy.

[Deleted]

My son and his girlfriend have been together for many years and have lived with each other for quite some time. They have a great relationship, and although it's not a huge issue that has caused a lot of strife part of me thinks it should be discussed between them more.

He suggested getting a prenuptial agreement, just because that is common advice. She stated that she wouldn't want to marry someone who wanted a prenuptial agreement because that means the person isn't completely devoted and is already preparing for the worst. She thinks if you don't see yourself spending the rest of your life with the person without doubt why bother getting married.

I understand her line of reasoning completely but at the same time I'm conflicted. This wasn't a big argument or anything and they are still very happy together, and my son is completely ready to marry her without a prenuptial agreement regardless.

What do you think of prenuptial agreements?

Prenups are good. If you love someone enough to protect their interests no matter what could happen (they could commit a heinous crime for all you know) then its a good show of love that you want to protect each other no matter what happens

[Tziva]

I think the concept is fine (and in many cases a good idea), but I can see why some people are offended by it.

[Deleted]

I think the concept is fine (and in many cases a good idea), but I can see why some people are offended by it.

The notion of love being the sole motivator for marriage is pretty weird to me. Yeah I love her completely, but marriage has distinct economic benefits and is the only reason we'd even bother.

Maybe it's a religious thing to people, just don't get it.

[Lyllian]

Prenups are a good idea, but a far better idea is to simply not get married. In this day and age marriages simply don't last, and frankly its an idea that should be relegated to the past.

If a couple loves each other, then they will stay together regardless of being married.

My tips for a happy, healthy long term relationship:

1) Do NOT get married.
2) Share the bills 50/50.
3) Do NOT share banks accounts or credit cards.
4) Be very careful when taking out a joint mortgage, make sure the contract specifies each partner is wholly responsible for exactly 50%.

[Deleted]

Prenups are a good idea, but a far better idea is to simply not get married. In this day and age marriages simply don't last, and frankly its an idea that should be relegated to the past.

If a couple loves each other, then they will stay together regardless of being married.

My tips for a happy, healthy long term relationship:

1) Do NOT get married.
2) Share the bills 50/50.
3) Do NOT share banks accounts or credit cards.
4) Be very careful when taking out a joint mortgage, make sure the contract specifies each partner is wholly responsible for exactly 50%.

Tax benefits yo.

[Deleted]

Prenups are depressing but I would probably sign one. I would sign a simple one that basically protected any assets from before the marriage; and agreed on a basic 50/50 split on all assets during the marriage. I think if you spend too much time overthinking it then it can definitely cast doubt on the relationship and add tension but as long as it's a fair prenup then I'd just sign it then forget about it.

[Deleted]

Prenups are depressing but I would probably sign one. I would sign a simple one that basically protected any assets from before the marriage; and agreed on a basic 50/50 split on all assets during the marriage. I think if you spend too much time overthinking it then it can definitely cast doubt on the relationship and add tension but as long as it's a fair prenup then I'd just sign it then forget about it.

Assets generated during a marriage are disparate as well. What if I start a project that earns millions, and she simply stops working as a result. 50/50 in that scenario sounds ridiculous.

[Bumbasta]

I think it's great. My parents are married that way, and it works. Even though they basically share everything, when you break up I guess this is the best option.

[Masark]

I am entirely certain that prenuptial agreements exist.

[Unholyground]

Regardless now, at least here in Canada they are not entitled to anything that was yours before you got together, anything bought while you were together is up for debate though. Basically the prenuptial concept is there to protect both men and women who might have had everything taken away from them otherwise, or things that were not theirs.

[Crissi]

I will insist on a prenup, if only because Im not sure if my families assets can be touched or not if I get divorced even if i didnt mix it. Keeping my families money and growing it is much mor eimportant to me than a marriage with no prenup because the guy is like "you dont TRUST me?" Oh, and keep any animals I have had prior to the marriage, because I'll be damned if Mr Snookums gets taken away by an asshole. (note: none of my cats or dogs are named Mr Snookums)

There are plenty more guys in the sea than needing to stick with one who insists on something stupid like that.

[Xargoth6634]

Don't think I'd marry someone who insisted on a prenup; I agree with those who say it shows a lack of commitment. It's a matter of personal opinion though, I don't think prenups are stupid or anything.