Are you selfless?

[Deleted]

A recently closed topic had me flabbergasted about the ´MEMEME` responses it got. Apparantly visiting someones BD no longer revolves around the birthdayboy/girl and your love for them or the fact that it makes that other person feel loved and important, but rather the question if you can be bothered to sit on your ass for 2h and maybe be bored a bit. And god forbid you tell someone different.

Personally, i find that lack of responsibility, compassion and going out of your way to do something nice for the other person behaviour disturbing. But maybe im a bit old fashioned, afterall, the individual is the center in the 21st century right, I have mine.

So i guess my question is: How selfless are you?
Can you be bothered to sit trough a musical play that makes your ears throw up, just because you know its important to whomever your coming to see?
Or are you the type of person that blows off your grandparents funeral because it doesnt fit in with your Jeopardy watching schedule?
Why do you think this is?

[Revi]

I don't know why your thread was closed, but reopening it under a new title is probably not the best idea.

And it depends. If I was really swamped and it was a lot of trouble I would have prioritized school over a birthday party, yes.

[Fahrenheit]

What's a music play? I presume you mean a song? Why would I listen to a song that "make my ears throw up" if I'm on my way to see them?

If you mean would I sit through a shitty song if my wife likes it? Than yes, I would and have done many times over the decade we've been together.

[Deleted]

I don't know why your thread was closed, but reopening it under a new title is probably not the best idea.

And it depends. If I was really swamped and it was a lot of trouble I would have prioritized school over a birthday party, yes.

I didnt reopen anything. The last thread was about a personal situation, where i asked right from wrong. The answers shed light on a different subject matter: The selflessness of people nowadays. Which is a different thread in its own.

[Hraklea]

As Joey Tribiani has said, "there's no selfless good deed".

[Deleted]

What's a music play? I presume you mean a song? Why would I listen to a song that "make my ears throw up" if I'm on my way to see them?

If you mean would I sit through a shitty song if my wife likes it? Than yes, I have.

For instance your son is in a band. And they suck. Do you go and listen, or do you tell him you wont come.
Of a concert (if someone plays a flute or something) Musical play.

[Fahrenheit]

For instance your son is in a band. And they suck. Do you go and listen, or do you tell him you wont come.
Of a concert (if someone plays a flute or something)

If they're a child yes. If say, my 23 year old son plays in some shitty ass cover band that plays in even shittier hole in the wall bars, no I wouldn't.

[Deleted]

You're thread was closed because you asked if you was right, everybody said no, you said you was...

Nobody cares about birthdays unless it's big

[Deleted]

You're thread was closed because you asked if you was right, everybody said no, you said you was...
Nobody cares about birthdays unless it's big

Were not talking about BD´s anymore. Were talking about general selflessness. Also, i was typing a way greyer response, but apparantly darsithis felt the need to instalock it. One could feel a moral responsibility for example. Assuming the relation is fine, and the distances to travel arent big. I said no, because i assumed everyone had a bit of selflessness. Thats what got me on selflessness in the first place. The flood of responses that showed that to some, other peoples birthdays are about them, and not about the BD person.

[Deleted]

Were not talking about BD´s anymore. Were talking about general selflessness. Also, i was typing a way greyer response, but apparantly darsithis felt the need to instalock it. One could feel a moral responsibility for example. Assuming the relation is fine, and the distances to travel arent big.

Do you mean selfishness or selflessness?

[TZK203]

No, nobody is selfless.

Even the most selfless people are selfish (almost typed shellfish, lulz) because they want to feel good doing something for others. In a sense, they're doing something good for others to make themselves feel good. AKA: feeding their ego.

[Deleted]

Do you mean selfishness or selflessness?

Selfish would be:
I wont go see your mom on her deathbed, caus i cant be arsed to put my cloths on.

Selfless would be:
I will go see your mom on her deathbed, eventhough i hate to see her this way, i know it matters alot to her if im there.

Theres the difference. Now you figure it out.

[Halyon]

Both yes and no.

[Deleted]

No, nobody is selfless.

Even the most selfless people are selfish (almost typed shellfish, lulz) because they want to feel good doing something for others. In a sense, they're doing something good for others to make themselves feel good. AKA: feeding their ego.

That's a broad generalization

However a healthy person is both

[Halyon]

Selfish would be:
I wont go see your mom on her deathbed, caus i cant be arsed to put my cloths on.

Selfless would be:
I will go see your mom on her deathbed, eventhough i hate to see her this way, i know it matters alot to her if im there.

Theres the difference. Now you figure it out.

I'd more say the first is more like extreme laziness. Selfishness is doing something solely for your own purpose, or wanting something done solely for your own benefit. Selfless is the opposite.

You can argue the serving your ego in the end anyway, but it still comes secondary to the main purpose of benefitting someone else than you, sometimes even to your own detriment.

[Deleted]

Selfish would be:
I wont go see your mom on her deathbed, caus i cant be arsed to put my cloths on.

Selfless would be:
I will go see your mom on her deathbed, eventhough i hate to see her this way, i know it matters alot to her if im there.

Theres the difference. Now you figure it out.

I'm aware of the difference was questioning iv you did because one moment you're saying everybody is selfish so scamming is ok

[Deleted]

I'd more say the first is more like extreme laziness. Selfishness is doing something solely for your own purpose, or wanting something done solely for your own benefit. Selfish is the opposite.

You dont want to put your cloths on.
You dont have to because you dont go.

- - - Updated - - -

I'm aware of the difference was questioning iv you did because one moment you're saying everybody is selfish so scamming is ok

I was merely observing and questioning while thing dont happen that often if the general empathy or lack theroff is present.
Same as the question how corrupt people and pedophiles manage to live for so long, not often being a target, while at the same time we have innocents murdered by the thousands. Its odd.

[Deleted]

The world isn't black and white...

Did I visit my grandparents death bed? Certainly
Did I go to my cousins birthday? No

[Deleted]

The world isn't black and white...

Did I visit my grandparents death bed? Certainly
Did I go to my cousins birthday? No

Does your cousin live close to you?
Did your cousin announce his BD long ago?
Do you like/love your cousin?
How often do you see your cousin aside from BD´s?
Did your cousin put alot of effort into your BD?

All these factors matter. U likely wont visit a cousin 200 miles away. Neither would you visit a cousin you recently had a fight with.
One could argue that you cared more for your grandparents than your cousin.

[Halyon]

You dont want to put your cloths on.I was merely observing and questioning while thing dont happen that often if the general empathy or lack theroff is present.

Sure, but I also attribute gaining something by being selfish. Not going solely because meh, clothes, is, in my view, more laziness than being selfish, although they both still apply. And if you intended to use the example as a clear example of being selfish, I'd personally say it wasn't perhaps the best. That's all I was saying with it.

If it was like "I don't want to go to my mothers funeral because they have happy hour at the pub, and I want to go there instead" that's selfish. Staying away from the drinking away sorrows there though, just off the top of my head.