1. #1
    Deleted

    New to RP, decided to create a basic backstory for my character. What do you think?

    I'm completely new to WoW RP and I've decided to give it a shot. I've set up a very basic profile and backstory for my character. (It's actually more of a few points than a backstory) What you're about to read is probably very bad as I've got very little experience in RP and no experience at all in WoW RP. I'm looking for input on my character. Is the backstory I've written "acceptable"? Is my character a Mary Sue/bad cliche/conflicts with the lore?

    Hakuro Wolfsong, Orc Shaman

    - 23 years old
    - Born as a Frostwolf
    - A bit short (slightly below average) and slender for an orc, has a slightly more lean/athletic build than the average orc
    - Prefers to have a little time alone but does enjoy company now and then
    - Isn't very talkative with people he doesn't know very much
    - Has his own Frostwolf companion
    - Prefers melee combat to the use of shamanistic powers
    - Still new as a shaman and lacks experience
    - Was quite small for an orc during his childhood and was often beat up by the other orcs and regarded as weak
    - A shaman saw potential in him and acted as his mentor during his teen years
    - His mentor eventually passed away (still haven't decided how)
    - Tattooed his mentor's wolf on his right arm to honor his mentor, who he has great respect for
    - Eventually decided to travel the world and join a cause (the Horde) in order to discover himself, gain experiences and become a better Shaman
    - His younger self was quite emotional while he is much more calm and composed as an adult
    - He's a great fighter and brawler as an adult, once again as opposed to his younger self
    - Definitely isn't an orc prone to bloodlust
    - One of the few ways to get him angry is to insult his family or his mentor
    Last edited by mmoc2c2bcbefc4; 2015-01-20 at 04:43 PM.

  2. #2
    Fine
    Fine
    Fine
    Unnecessary; this is a trait everyone has
    Unnecessary; this is normal
    Fine
    Fine
    Fine
    Doesn't really make sense in a tribal environment
    Fine
    What sort of death do you want him to have? Is this supposed to be a plot hook/arc, or is it just a fact?
    Fine, but idk how different wolves look from one another. Maybe I'm just racist against wolves
    Fine, though I'm not sure if the Frostwolf clan is firmly a part of the Horde or not
    Unnecessary; this is how most people mature
    Fine
    Fine
    Fine
    If you are particularly bold, you could use a Shiny Ditto. Do keep in mind though, this will infuriate your opponents due to Ditto's beauty. Please do not use Shiny Ditto. You have been warned.

  3. #3
    Deleted
    Quote Originally Posted by LilSaihah View Post
    Unnecessary; this is a trait everyone has
    Unnecessary; this is normal
    First of all, thanks for the feedback!

    Now that I think about it the way I worded these two traits does make them kind of unnecessary. What I meant is that he's not extroverted and usually prefers to go on his own way. (Which wouldn't have worked out very well in the tribal environment of the Frostwolf clan)

    Quote Originally Posted by LilSaihah View Post
    Doesn't really make sense in a tribal environment
    Don't the orcs scorn the weak though? I mean, imagine an orc child in the Frostwolf clan learning to hunt yet he's never able to get anything right. Won't he be regarded as a kind of 'runt of the pack' by his peers? Although if it doesn't make sense I'll leave it out, it won't be a problem.

    Quote Originally Posted by LilSaihah View Post
    What sort of death do you want him to have? Is this supposed to be a plot hook/arc, or is it just a fact?
    Fine, but idk how different wolves look from one another. Maybe I'm just racist against wolves
    Fine, though I'm not sure if the Frostwolf clan is firmly a part of the Horde or not
    Unnecessary; this is how most people mature
    About the death, I mean I'm not sure if I want him to have a natural death or a 'died in combat' death. It's just a fact but it does make a little difference as orcs who died in combat are revered much more than those that have a natural death.

    About the wolf tattoo, I guess you're right I'll change it if something better comes up in mind. I just put it in to show his dedication to his mentor, doesn't matter if it's a wolf tattoo, an axe tattoo or whatever.

    I'm not really sure but I thought the Frostwolf clan is in good relations with the Horde but chose to stay out of it because of their choice of accepting the Forsaken in the Horde. Anyway, he did leave the Frostwolf clan on good terms, they don't regard him as a traitor or anything.

    As for the maturing part, I meant that he was easily angered and often picked up fights (albeit losing them) when he was young yet he's the opposite as an adult. Although yes, it does sound like how people normally mature.
    Last edited by mmoc2c2bcbefc4; 2015-01-20 at 05:15 PM.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by HowlingMoon View Post
    Don't the orcs scorn the weak though? I mean, imagine an orc child in the Frostwolf clan learning to hunt yet he's never able to get anything right. Won't he be regarded as a kind of 'runt of the pack' by his peers? Although if it doesn't make sense I'll leave it out, it won't be a problem.
    This is true. Draka was a weakling orc as a child, and other orcs thought her clan should've had her killed.
    You will find that many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view.

  5. #5
    It's a decent character. Not Mary Sue at all. I say go for it.

  6. #6
    Deleted
    Quote Originally Posted by Nyctanessa View Post
    This is true. Draka was a weakling orc as a child, and other orcs thought her clan should've had her killed.
    I've read up a little on Draka and yes, that's the approach I want to take with my character. Not to mention that she's also a Frostwolf.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lynneiah View Post
    It's a decent character. Not Mary Sue at all. I say go for it.
    Thanks!

  7. #7
    Deleted
    The average orc size is between 5 and 8 feet... If you're below that, you're 4 foot something, which is... A midget orc, a better way to word it would be despite your orc being a type of warrior, he's smaller than the average orc warrior (7-8 feet) like perhaps 6'7.

    Also the Frostwolf Clan of the Main Universe IS part of the Horde, they just work like a separate faction of the Horde alike the Orgrimmar orcs and so on. So they can deny aid to other members of the Horde. Drek'thar is only the Chieftain, because Thrall became Warchief, and you cannot be chieftain of one clan and Warchief of them all at the same time. Example: Garrosh is the Warlord of the Warsong Clan in WoD, not Grommash as he is the Warchief of the Iron Horde. No clue why Thrall hasn't regained the Chieftainship though.

    I know I'm a little late in this conversation, but I thought these things were important to get in there.

  8. #8
    Couple other things to consider, not necessarily to do with your backstory's quality, but I felt it was worth asking. I am interested, at least .

    -He comes off as a lone wolf. What happened to his family? Even if his clan saw shame for his family in his weakness, family is important to Frostwolves. That he survived, especially given that his time of birth was a rough time for all orcs on Azeroth, should indicate he had caretakers, and he seems to care for them. Do they yet live? Don't be afraid to be one of the few RPers that has a backstory that isn't completely tragic. Most go with dead, it seems.
    -Was he born to the free Frostwolves, hiding in the harsh snowy climate of the Alterac Mountain area, or was he ever in the camps the Humans put captured orcs in, after their defeat during the second war?
    -Be weary of making lone wolf characters! That you're here on a fan forum asking people's opinion indicates you are a social person. I've seen a lot of social people get frustrated by their character's lack of ability to integrate into on-going RP, forever stuck by the side-lines, because their character is too nervous, shy, depressed, arrogant or just plain lacking in social skills or desire for social interaction. Give a thought to what sort of role you'd like your character to take in interaction with others, and how you will get characters both to interact with you, and enjoy interacting with you. Because a character can be completely awesome, while also be completely unsuitable for getting into RP with

  9. #9
    You said this was basic, and that's... What it is. I would seriously recommend that you make a character who's motivated to talk to everyone almost all the time. You will have more fun, and you will get a lot of friends. Lone wolf characters are a dime a dozen, and most of them just want to be talked to. So go talk to them. Be the character who doesn't give a fuck that they have an eye patch and are smoking a cigar. Go talk to him about apple pie.

    Second, and this is something it took a shamefully long time for me to learn, your character has traits, but no story. Traits are fine, but they influence how you RP your character, they don't actively give your character a goal. Nor do they give you a story to play out, and perhaps share with others. Think of goals for your characters, and for the love of god, don't have your characters achieve all their goals in one day, or one week, or even one year if you want to play the character long term.

    This is just an example of a recent character of mine. Hopefully it'll help illustrate what I mean. She is a Night Elf mage, not a Highborne but one of the night elves who decided to be taught by the returning Highborne from Eldre'thalas. She's still an apprentice, then. Her teacher was murdered and a fel mark was left on his dead body. From these few sentences, we have both a goal and the beginnings of a story. Goal: Finish training, become a proper magus. Story: What or who killed her mentor?

    While I decide, as the player, when story and goal are accomplished, I am doing both myself and the character a favor by not letting this be a quick affair. By giving the character time to grow and experience things, she will feel more like a true mage once she achieves a certain level of mastery. And the story... Well, it's going to be long and grueling.

    You could think of the goal as what your character wants, and the story as why your character wants what he/she wants. Though it isn't just that. Do yourself the favor of considering and adding in these things. In all likelihood, your character will be more long-lived. You will have more fun, because your character isn't just your RP guild tag or whatever. The character is someone and something other than the people you RP with. This is important, and will actually help you find more interesting RP, and interesting people to RP with. In my experience.

  10. #10
    I would love to see you make a story for your character!!!
    Hey maybe our characters could even meet! I'm currently trying to roleplay as a blood elf paladin who isn't apart of but does work with the blood knights. You can see a small part of his story in a topic I posted Realism questions

  11. #11

    Looks good

    Looks like you put some work into character development. Welcome to the RP community Creating a back story and goal for your character long term will also be a great addition. Another thing I would suggest is creating a Tumblr or some kind of repository for all of your RP thoughts, stories, pictures, etc that you develop. There are a lot out there and it's a cool way to connect with others. lanotsa.tumblr.com for example

    Finding a guild through RP is also a cool experience and definitely enhances the quality of RP imo. Wow forums are great help as well.

  12. #12

  13. #13
    Deleted
    Lol i tried roleplaying once, got turned off after 2 days because other roleplay nerds take it too seriously and can't help it when i counterargument them in roleplay discussions. Idiots.

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