Open Letter to Parents of League of Legends Players

[Dasani]

I didn't see any other threads on this so I just wanted to talk about this a minute.

I tend to visit penny arcade now and then and read the latest comics, usually with something funny or interesting to learn.

Today I saw this one http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2015/02/11

To which I wondered to myself, what the hell is he talking about? So I read his rant of a post and then read the "letter" that started the whole mess which is here http://boards.na.leagueoflegends.com...egends-players

So for me, i'm not really sure what to think here.

The letter to parents is written in a semi-douchey kind of way, but it is accurate at least. Making someone spontaneously bail in the middle of a game sucks for all the other people involved and it can have consequences beyond "darn, i wanted to play a little more tonight" like getting removed from your team if you happen to be on one.

I think tycho is a being a little unreasonable and douchey in regards to this whole thing. You'd think someone who has spent all of his life playing video games would actually be a little more sympathetic to issues like this one with someone bailing on a game and essentially ruining the fun of the remaining players for the remainder of the game and having consequences to rating for all involved as well. Instead he just says "i dont care if your little tryndamere gets sad, hes not a real person". Well, yeah he is actually. He is played by a real person that is being directly affected by your actions.

It is as big of a dick move as going to your kid's highschool football game and picking him up 15 minutes into the game saying it's time to go home and eat, he doesn't have time to finish playing. It doesn't just affect HIM, it affects a lot of other people.

I remember when I was a kid, I played a lot of console games and was often annoyed to be interrupted from that to go do little chores and whatnot, but my parents or whatever family member always said the exact same thing "just pause it". And they were right. I could. So I just hit the start button, ran and did what I had to do, then ran back and resumed. But once the technology advanced to the point where online play was possible, I had a retort to those 3 words they'd used on me for many years before that. When they said to pause it, I explained to them that I couldn't. You can't just pause this type of game and if I get up and leave, it's going to screw over all these other people. Give me like 5-10 minutes to finish what i'm doing then i'll go do what you want me to do. Now fortunately for me, my parents weren't complete dickwads like some are, and also I was almost done with highschool by the time my first online games came around. Things like the original starcraft in 1998 Starcraft (original), almost 20 years ago now.

But I just find it kind of shocking tycho is going to end up being one of those parents that doesn't give two shits about anything but himself and his own schedule, especially when historically they have talked about how bad it was dealing with these exact kinds of issues with their own parents in the past.

Just seems like a dick move to me to have parents say you and none of your friends or other people in general don't matter, I want this trash put in the can now because REASONS. I mean it's one thing if they start up a game when they know ahead of time they wont have time for a full game and are just doing it to be stupid ass kids like they do sometimes. Hell my niece pulls that bullshit EVERY SINGLE NIGHT, she doesn't do her homework or take a shower until its AT her bed time, then uses those two things as an excuse to stay up late every night. That is bullshittery. But when they are supposed to be on free time and you go busting in there demanding they do some trivial task instantly, thats just dickish for a parent to do in my opinion. And again, tycho's reasoning here is raising a kid is hard, so that is justification to treat them like crap and have no regard for their hobbies or consequences for when you force them to do things spontaneously.

Just wondering other people's thoughts on this. Kids need to get their ass in bed on time and not try to stay up late to finish a game, they need to do their homework, get their chores done, all that other shit. But when there is nothing scheduled they need to do and are told to stop playing for whatever reason, without even letting them finish the current game they are in, that just seems like a dick move to me. I'd think anyone who actually participated in that kind of game or had even raided in WOW would understand the dynamics of that situation and would know how assholeish it is. Am i wrong?

[nerfducken]

Grow up, get a job, live in your own house, do what you want, problem solved.

[Duronos]

Grow up, get a job, live in your own house, do what you want, problem solved.

What about kids that aren't 18? Not to mention in the US it's very hard to get your own place at 18. The point is, either the kid should ask if anything is happening in the next 1 or so or the parents should be telling them dinner is at such and such time. That way, everyone's happy.

[DMCDante]

I wouldn't even allow my children to play those online competitive games in the first place, I wouldn't be able to listen to all the screaming and yelling. Fuck that my house my rules.

I am 27 now and looking back when I started online gaming at 16 or so, I was a complete imbecile, I actually wondered how my mother put up with me and raging at lost games, missed raids and what not.

And I am convinced kids in their puberty copy what they see and experience, not in the unrealistic way of being influenced to murder his neighborhood or the sorts. But rather to respond violently to losing, or being told what to do which they do not want. So yeah, I wouldn't let my kids play league of legends or whatever is popular.

[Spraxle]

"Tycho's" perspective is tinted by that of a parent now. If he didn't have any kids he would probably be on the side of 'the kids' as it were.

The underlying problem here is that it's just shitty parenting. If you let your kids play a game that is online and involves others you as the parent need to set ground rules. I know that means you can't plop your kid down at the computer and pretend like they're part of your family or whatever when it's convenient. When I say ground rules I mean doing stuff like 'no LoL' 30min before dinner or whatever. Rules like that set boundaries that keep everyone 'safe.' But it feels like a lot of parents don't want to do simple stuff like. Being a tyrant isn't good, but neither is being a rug for your kids to wipe their feet on.

[Duronos]

I wouldn't even allow my children to play those online competitive games in the first place, I wouldn't be able to listen to all the screaming and yelling. Fuck that my house my rules.

I am 27 now and looking back when I started online gaming at 16 or so, I was a complete imbecile, I actually wondered how my mother put up with me and raging at lost games, missed raids and what not.

And I am convinced kids in their puberty copy what they see and experience, not in the unrealistic way of being influenced to murder his neighborhood or the sorts. But rather to respond violently to losing, or being told what to do which they do not want. So yeah, I wouldn't let my kids play league of legends or whatever is popular.

But you'd let them drink? Here's the thing, you can shelter kids but it often just leads to a way worse outcome. Good luck with parenting though.

[Charge me Doctor]

I kinda agree on most of things about teaching your kid to schedule his time, you shouldn't start a new game if it's 20 minutes before bed time. Tho, it really depends on a kid, if he does start the game anyways, the parent have all rights to punish him for being an asshole to other 9 players by turning PC off.

- - - Updated - - -

I wouldn't even allow my children to play those online competitive games in the first place, I wouldn't be able to listen to all the screaming and yelling. Fuck that my house my rules.

I am 27 now and looking back when I started online gaming at 16 or so, I was a complete imbecile, I actually wondered how my mother put up with me and raging at lost games, missed raids and what not.

And I am convinced kids in their puberty copy what they see and experience, not in the unrealistic way of being influenced to murder his neighborhood or the sorts. But rather to respond violently to losing, or being told what to do which they do not want. So yeah, I wouldn't let my kids play league of legends or whatever is popular.

Why do you scream and yell when play games?

[OCDFreaK]

Online gaming is still a "new" thing though. The parents coming up in the"now" will understand gaming and technology in general and very likely won't be a dick.

[NuLogic]

oh god the whole I brought you into this world so you should be grateful crap /eyesrolloff

[OCDFreaK]

New.. to who exactly?
It's been around for... almost three decades now if not more?

My grandparents have been living in Australia for 40 years and still have broken English.

Unless you are born and brought up with something, you won't care or bother to learn about it. Which is true.

Also since its something online and virtual ie. "not real" most just brush it off as useless and "waste of time" or "They're just pixels" and all that.

[Mask]

Agreed. This is one of the few PA comics where I don't feel like I have any connection to the author.
Usually PA is great. They are funny, poignant, and seem to have some of the same views about things as myself. Not with this comic, though. This is just unreasonable parent rage and it makes me sad that Tycho is the one who penned it.

[Bathory]

I wouldn't even allow my children to play those online competitive games in the first place, I wouldn't be able to listen to all the screaming and yelling. Fuck that my house my rules.

You do know headphones are a thing?

[Charge me Doctor]

Online gaming is still a "new" thing though. The parents coming up in the"now" will understand gaming and technology in general and very likely won't be a dick.

No, it's not, i remember getting taken off the football field by my mother because i decided that she won't do it because of stupid dinner. Most of parents do understand what online interaction is, it's the same as playing with kids outside, and turning off PC makes the same effect as taking your kid home while others are still playing, you ruin the game and make your kid look stupid. Good thing that most likely people he was playing with will never meet him again, which in case of RL example is not true

[Axethor]

My parents tried the "just pause it" a lot when I first started playing LoL (and to a lesser extent WoW). Eventually my mom understood how online gaming worked, so she would let me know when dinner was getting ready so I had time to finish the game I was in and act as a warning not to join a new one.

The reality is most of the time our parents barely understand the internet, never mind online gaming. Some are just better than others when it comes to dealing with their child who plays an online game. It doesn't mean they are bad parents, it just means they don't know how to deal with this new situation. My dad still doesn't understand how I can spend so much time online when I go home for college breaks, but he's accepted it at this point and doesn't bother me about it anymore.

[Charge me Doctor]

If you're living under your parents roof, eating your parents food, using your parents computer/internet/everything, you better damn well listen and obey everything they say (in general of course).

Tho the rules of the house shouldn't be made "on move", if you said to your kid that he can play 'till 21:00, you can't force him to bed in 20:40 unless it's a part of a punishment for violating other house rules

[Deleted]

Both the letter and the penny arcade comic are hilarious.

[Dasani]

Grow up, get a job, live in your own house, do what you want, problem solved.

Think you missed the point, i haven't lived with my parents in over 15 years. But with a response like yours you aren't interested in an actual conversation so i won't bother to explain it.

I wouldn't even allow my children to play those online competitive games in the first place, I wouldn't be able to listen to all the screaming and yelling. Fuck that my house my rules.

I am 27 now and looking back when I started online gaming at 16 or so, I was a complete imbecile, I actually wondered how my mother put up with me and raging at lost games, missed raids and what not.

And I am convinced kids in their puberty copy what they see and experience, not in the unrealistic way of being influenced to murder his neighborhood or the sorts. But rather to respond violently to losing, or being told what to do which they do not want. So yeah, I wouldn't let my kids play league of legends or whatever is popular.

I partly agree with this. I was always wary of the kids in my family starting to use the internet because I KNOW what kind of shit exists on the internet. I know how the people are, I know the subject matter commonly discussed, I know the toxic personalities and people. I think it's a bad place for kids to be. It's why I was somewhat horrified when my nieces started to use facebook. And guess what? Concerns were justified, because not 2 months after they started using it, started seeing posts on people's walls those kids made back and forth with streams of profanity and racism because 1) Kids are fucking assholes and 2) Internet people are fucking assholes, and when you combine them into one person, you have a shit factory.

But at the same time, denying them from the internet would kind of limit their "technological development" or whatever you wanna call it. You dont wanna go your whole life with no internet then suddenly have to rely on it in the real world spontaneously some day. Those are the kind of problems parents face. How do you protect your kids from as much shit concentrate as possible without just sheltering them into naivete and ignorance.

Anyway, another discussion for another day I suppose.

I'd be wary of letting my kids play League at all, but i'd probably let them once they were old enough. They get a lot of that kind of bullshittery at school anyway, so it isn't like the internet would be introducing them to words they haven't heard and said in school at that point. But i'd never just spontaneously bust in on them in the middle of a game and demand they stop immediately to do something else unless there was a good reason to. And I think it would be more important to teach them to actually care about other players and to be a decent person instead of a selfish ass that just does whatever he feels like all the time with no care to how it affects others. That's just me though. I fully realize a lot of parents give zero shits. They let kids play games to babysit them and keep them out of their hair, but don't hesitate to force them to do something whenever they feel like without warning.

A little respect both ways would solve all that. But even good kids that do what they should more often than not can still have unreasonable parents and that feels like what this situation kind of is. A lot of parents always feel like they are at the top of the food chain and perhaps it was their own tyrannical upbringing or maybe just the fact they're an unimportant cog at work, but a lot of them want absolute control over their kids all the time and demand instant action when they speak.

Now i'm not parent, i'm just an uncle, but i've been one for a long time and for 3 different kids, each with different upbringings. And while one of them did need more discipline and you had to be careful that make sure he did what he needed to do and didn't just shrug it off, the other 2 did what they needed to do if you let them do it in their own time. Give them a task, give them a deadline, they will get it done. No need to say "FUCKING DO IT NOW! NOWWWWW!!!!" like a psycho. I've also spent a few summers with the wad of all 3 of them before and had to be the one responsible for them for months at a time during such periods and still had no troubles really.

I mean can't you just give your kids a chance? Give them an opportunity to prove they can be responsible about things and do what they are supposed to do instead of just assuming they aren't going to do it? And they might slip up once in a while because they're just dumb kids, but for the most part I think good kids get a lot of flak from their parents that is unwarranted.

Those kids in my life have just put some perspective on this whole situation. Like, it's unthinkable for me to do something like that to them without a damn good reason.

I think if parents would consider that kind of thing along a similar vein as football, and thinking of it like interrupting a football game to take your kid home randomly to take out the trash, it would help put some perspective on the whole thing. I mean parents don't do that because they know it affects the team and the social ramifications as well. But they do it for online multiplayer games and such, when it's essentially the same thing. Both are just hobbies you enjoy doing and neither will really have any impact on your life or future, unless you happen to get a scholarship from it when is very unlikely. But it's treated with more respect.

I guess it'll take a few more generations. Still too many people far too self concerned.

[Charmanderp]

I feel that if you are gonna take this kind of attitude towards kids you are better off not having them in the first place. If you are worried about kids inconveniencing you or your schedule don't have them it's not a requirement.

[Silver Forte]

But you'd let them drink? Here's the thing, you can shelter kids but it often just leads to a way worse outcome. Good luck with parenting though.

It's a game. They're kids. They don't get to do whatever they want. How pampered are they if they bitch about now being able to play a video game? First world problems.

[Yosef1015]

as much as i love online gaming and hate when people leave, i still feel the need to mention that its just a game