You Have Been Selected To Speak With The First Space Alien!

[Super Kami Dende]

You have been chosen to speak to the first space alien to come to Earth, why they have chosen you is a mystery. How would you interact with it?

It is currently in the conference room waiting for you


I would walk in, say "AYY LMAO!" Shake its hand (if it has one) and ask it how its doing and how the trip was.

I would likely say "This place is going downhill, retreat while you can. Can I come along?"

[Revi]

Ask about their history, their culture and ask for as complete collection of their knowledge as possible, and offer the same in return. Then kindly ask them to leave as alone, regardless of their intentions.

[Pony Soldier]

"What took you so long? Are we still going through with the plan? Good. Lets finish this already..."

[The Yeti]

I'd ask them if they brought any snacks.

[KayossZero]

What ever I'd do, I wouldn't let my game be as weak as those fools!

[Deleted]

Check for hidden cameras cause aliens dont exist and if I dont find any, theyre obviously soviet spies in disguise so become a national hero by exposing them!

[S7orm]

"stop stalking me, your shit is in Nevada"

[Raiukage]

I'd ask about their culture. And, if it sounded alright, their immigration policies. Then pack my things.

[Beefsquatch]

"Do you have rare pepes?"

[teddytous]

Few things completely wrong with that:

1. How the fuck would you seduce something that not only has no idea what humans are, but doesn't speak any languages you're fluent in, or even know of (it's not going to speak an Earthly language)
2. What if it has razor-like orifices? It's an alien, you don't fucking know.
3. How will you know its gender(s) (if any) and if you'll be attracted to it?

1) Seduction isn't about language, its about confidence. See any womens magazine as reference.
2) Every creature has a soft juicey spot. Bottom of the abyss to the highest mountain, haven't seen anything yet a determined person couldn't fuck if they were committed enough. Pretty sure I could find a video of a person fucking an alligator snapping turtle on the internet if I tried hard enough.

3) Mineral, plant, animal, gender. Who cares. You wouldn't be fucking them to start a relationship. It would be about dominance and status.

[Beefsquatch]

1)Pretty sure I could find a video of a person fucking an alligator snapping turtle on the internet if I tried hard enough..

That's disturbing...

[endersblade]

I would say, "About damned time, now take me home! And bomb the shit out of this place when we leave."