should my daughter visit her mother in jail? is there a benefit to visiting?

[dextersmith]

Your wife made a mistake but is otherwise a good person. daughter and mother need each other. Don't worry about the bad image, she knows where her mother is. Seeing what prisons are like could deter her from criminal temptations too.

[Kryos]

14 is old enough to make the decision for herself I think.

This is the best answer - and don't try to influence here. Give her the official report if she wants to know the details why her mother is in jail and let her decide herself if she wants to visit her or not.

[dextersmith]

If this isn't trolling then maybe YOU are the one who shouldn't be around your daughter. Asking for serious life advice on a videogame forum where magic cows and pandas are discussed makes me question your own ability to make even simple life choices.

As well as taking advice from strangers he's never corresponded with before.

What kind of husband are you? Standing by her to further punish her with guilt and her daughter. The law is already punishing her.

[1924]

Thanks for answering. Main problem I have is she will see her mom in a jail jumpsuit and other inmates and even guards that could be intimidating . Is that ok for a 14 year old to see?



My wife said bring her if she wants to come. My daughter said she would like to visit I just wonder if it is a good idea due to the factors I mentioned

[Kryos]

Thanks for answering. Main problem I have is she will see her mom in a jail jumpsuit and other inmates and even guards that could be intimidating . Is that ok for a 14 year old to see?
My wife said bring her if she wants to come. My daughter said she would like to visit I just wonder if it is a good idea due to the factors I mentioned

For a 10 year old this would be a problem. She is 14. She can handle that.

[checking facts]

My advice is to not listen to any advice you get on this site.

but that's advice on this site, so the OP shouldn't listen to you. But if the OP won't listen to you, he'll listen to advice on this site. Than he'll listen to your advice and not listen to advice on this site but your advice is on this site so the OP won't listen to you and than he'll listen to advice and than he'll listen to you and than...

ERROR ERROR ERROR

[Hotmail]

seems like an experience that could build character, depending on how you (as a parent) handle it

all that aside, nobody here knows you or your family (or the kind of area you live in), so I'd recommend getting the pros and cons from a parenting counselor directly, and making your own decision.

[Johnkie]

as many others say, she is old enough to decide for herself.
Just support her decision.

[Deleted]

Prisoners should not have any sort of visitors or contact with the outside world. Once they enter, they see no family or friends or ever get see the sky again until their time is served. The ONLY exception to this is being taken under armed guard to a medical facility, or to the funeral of a direct relative (spouse, parent, child). They forfeit the right to any sort civil liberties the moment thy broke the law.

[nextormento]

They forfeit the right to any sort civil liberties the moment thy broke the law.

Reality disagrees.

[Everwake]

Seeing her mother in jail might show your daughter just how lousy jail is. I say take her.

[Deleted]

yeah I think I'd let my child visit its mother

[Jester Joe]

She won't be in that type of jail/prison for that sort of crime and for that length of time. Seriously, where are you people getting this shit from? Also, you don't directly visit them at their holding cells/room but at the visitation area with other women and their families.

I don't know about you, but when I went on a trip to the jail for my Criminal Justice class, no matter where you went, it was gross. Nothing looked like it was really cleaned, and even then, they would still see their mom having no freedoms basically, something that might not hit someone until they see it.

The only jail I've ever spent time in wasn't gross at all. We spent most of the day playing games and watching movies as if we were stuck inside at camp. The food wasn't half-bad either. Remember, this isn't Hollywood.

Then you lucked out? Why does everyone assume just because "I saw a jail! None of them are bad!"?

[Deleted]

Reality disagrees.

sometimes, Just occasionally, Reality needs to get a grip and start treating people the way they deserve. I have seen good, honest people get the shitty end of the stick most of their lives, and I have been the victim of serial thieves who got away with it because of lack of police interest.

if you break the rules set down by society then you have no place being in, or communicating with that society.

[nextormento]

if you break the rules set down by society then you have no place being in, or communicating with that society.

You might want to move out and find a more tyrannical society.
The one you live in has, as a rule, that rule breakers get to communicate. And we don't really want to break that rule.

[1924]

sometimes, Just occasionally, Reality needs to get a grip and start treating people the way they deserve. I have seen good, honest people get the shitty end of the stick most of their lives, and I have been the victim of serial thieves who got away with it because of lack of police interest.

if you break the rules set down by society then you have no place being in, or communicating with that society.

I don't want to give people, especially my daughter, the impression that her mom shouldn't serve her punishment or her stay should be made easier

[Yvaelle]

I don't want to give people, especially my daughter, the impression that her mom shouldn't serve her punishment or her stay should be made easier

She should serve her sentence, and your daughter should see it and understand why. With that said, you should help to make her stay easier. Her punishment is being locked up for six months, her punishment is not meant to be isolation from her family: if it were, there wouldn't be visitation privileges at all.

The goal of any prison in a developed country is meant to be rehabilitation - that means helping people to live their lives within the law, when they exit prison. The court has punished her, your job and your daughter's job is to help rehabilitate her.

[Mormolyce]

14 is about old enough for the illusions to be dispelled and for her to start seeing her parents as regular flawed human beings. If she hasn't already.

I wouldn't bring my daughters to a place like that.

If it's 6 months, I'd just wait.

They don't lock you in with the inmates you know.

[draganid]

I too think this is a troll.

You're standing by your wife and not leaving her, but your "thinking of letting my daughter visit her and have her still be involved with her child"

The fuck?

You either stand by her or you dont.

If this isnt a troll, you sound like an abusive/controlling parent and i really question on whether you should be involved with your daughter

im with this guy. should be a no-brainer to take her to see her mom/your wife

[ItachiZaku]

14 is old enough to make the decision for herself I think.

If a 14 year old can baby sit and have sex, they can go to prison to visit mom.