Dating a heavier girl?

[Deleted]

[redacted][/redacted]Redacted Redacted

[Deleted]

Wtf is up with all these body threads now?

[Fawkess]

was she a cheerleader?

[Lotus Victoria]

Talk with her. Seriously. It's better that way.

It may be hard for you, but maybe this will make her change her weight. Sometimes the truth hurts.

[Lodreh]

Pop two little blue pills and shag her rotten... then spend the day at the gym or whatever.

[Jotaux]

Well you said you are only looking for sexual partners in the dating app so why not give her a confidence boost?

[Acidbaron]

The changing your partner thing never works in the long run.

You meet in real life, you don't send of signals that you like her if you don't and slowly end it. Or you could just chicken out, popping and dropping here hardly is a confidence boosting effect either.

You can also be somewhat of an ass and obnoxious not towards her but towards your surrounding that won't make her want to stay in touch with you either, if you really want to 'save' her feelings.

Multiple exits possible in this situation just depends what you want to do.

[Fenominon]

She knows she's fat. And she was hoping you'd not really notice. Or not care the longer you spoke to her. It's a fatgirl tactic on dating sites.

[lockedout]

What do you guys think I should do? Please be as brutally scathing or insightful as you like!

You could just let her pleasure you and call it a day.

[Deleted]

You could do it the other way around.. get as heavy as her.

[Phookah]

If you aren't interested, tell her you aren't interested.
She doesn't need some random person preaching to her about losing weight.

[Skulltaker]

Be honest, but meet her. Internet and Apps and texting are in no way a substitute for a good and honest first impression. You might like her. And even more important, be honest, without being rude.

Don't start something with someone out of pity. In the beginning they will love it, and you will feel good about it, but sooner or later you will met someone. That breakup will be messy, and learning that someone only started a relationship because they felt sorry for you is one of the worst kinds of pain you can put someone through. It will overshadow all the good things you shared.

I know it sounds a lot easier than it is. So, agree to meet her, with no agreed upon outcome. Grab a drink, see a movie, whatever floats your boat. If you decide to hook up, make it abundndly clear that for the time being it's only physical. (I hope hook up is the correct term here... not a native english speaker. Having intercourse, as Sheldon would put it. Heh. Put it.)

Also, if you get to know her better, ask her about the weight. Looks seem to be of major concern to you (and even though inner feats are just as important, in the end looks are a major attraction - thats what they are for), so it might be a dealbreaker. You sound like a reasonable and decent guy, so I trust you will find an apropriate moment to pop that particular question. Not after desert, no matter how comfortable a woman looks and how often she said how much she liked your Tiramisu, don't ask her about weight after desert. Death would be preferable to what you'll have to endure. Maybe all she needs to shed the weight is someone to help her. It's often eating snacks because you cannot meet someone, cannot meet someone because you're overweight and looking for the wrong guys, and so you keep snackig... Maybe it's due to health reasons.

Also, Kudos to you to ask open and honest like that.

[Kalis]

I was basically horny and looking for sexual partners, which I made clear in my profile in not so many words...

Part of me feels like I could change her...

What if she falls in love with me...

I don't want to turn her down, she said she's been heartbroken before, I feel like she could really do with a confidence boost.

If you're only after sex, why does changing her, love or heartbreak feature in your post? It doesn't seem like you actually want someone just as a sexual partner.

[Deleted]

why does this song come to mind.....

[Sohalia]

It's a pretty tough call. There isn't really much you can do about losing some attraction to her due to her weight. It is what it is.

I don't think it's selfish or wrong for you to think that later on down the road you can help her with changing her body. She may not be happy with her body, either. (But you're on one of those hook-up apps, looking for a girlfriend? Idk this is confusing.)

How you go about it could go a long way in this, if you're willing. Like you mentioned, if you keep going on with this relationship you could bring up how you're willing to go to the gym or go jogging with her.

Try to be honest about it without being brutal with her. If she asks you if you think she's 'fat,' just tell her "No." But also add in that she would be healthier if she lost weight, and offer to work out with her. (This is basically what my boyfriend does for my 150lb butt, only he adds in that he would naturally find me more attractive if I were thinner [NOT implying that he doesn't find my attractive now.] But then again we've been together for about seven years.)

[Grimbold21]

Wtf is up with all these body threads now?

Probably Adamshadow in disguise

[Lord Havik]

How much 'heavier' are we talkin'?

Because if she's jabba the hut under those headshots, I'd say leave it. Not worth trying to change her when you'd just met.

Long term weight loss and general healthiness does not happen overnight and I doubt two people who just met could create much of a relationship around one finding fault with the other and trying to convince her to alter her long-held lifestyle choices and habits. Too much work and dedication just for some casual sex.

[AeneasBK]

Wtf is up with all these body threads now?

This is the future right now, Tilli

[Clone]

Just don't sleep with her. If you enjoy talking to her then just do that.

[Xirrohon]

Fat chicks are for poor guys. If youre into it, go for it. Personally, I wouldnt date a fat chic unless it was a slump buster or... I was poor. Trust me, if youre with a fat chick, then you prob dont have much money.