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  1. #1

    Offending Fat People?

    Myself and my colleague have been hitting the gym a lot more recently. We've been discussing it a lot at work as well as our diet and nutrition. We find it motivating to bounce off one another. However, the grossly fat person we sit near has complained to our manager. Apparently, it's not polite to talk about such things in the presence of morbidly obese people. It makes her feel upset and "worthless".

    None of our conversations have been directed to her. We merely enjoy talking about our diets and our workouts as we're both passionate about it.

    We both got called aside by our manager (individually) and were told to "cut it out".

    Where do we draw the line here? Do we now have to think what we say, to not offend the grossly overweight?
    It really annoyed me to be honest. Especially when you see them chug a litre of Coke and stuff down a pack of 5 Sainsbury's cookies at lunch time.

    Thoughts and opinions?

    EDIT: So much misunderstanding..

    I don't mention fat people AT ALL. I don't intentionally gloat in front of them. Me and my colleague, having a conversation at our desks. The fat person mentioned sits on the other side of the desk.

    We talk about our gains, and our fitness levels and our improved physicality. At no point do we mention fat people
    Last edited by Tommy T; 2015-08-24 at 06:15 AM.

  2. #2
    The Insane Revi's Avatar
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    Does this constitute "fit shaming"? lol.

    I think it's silly, but your managed is probably just trying to avoid conflict.

  3. #3
    Scarab Lord tj119's Avatar
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    You should be able to talk about your body and nutritious lifestyle all you want. If she doesn't like people talking about how healthy they are maybe she should cut back on the Big Macs and get some exercise.

  4. #4
    most people are too lazy to do anything about their problems ...

    if that fat person is offended by your talk and the manager told you to cut it out im sure that is what you should do

    perhaps if you could find some common ground with the fat person, apologize to them and say that you meant nothing by it and perhaps even offer to help them with their body weight problem ? if they refuse thats about it dont talk about gym anymore during work

    if however they do understand that you apologized honestly because you didnt mean to hurt them and you want to help im sure taht everything will be alright

    obesity is indeed an sickness but it also shouldnt be a reason to offend people. some just arent strong enough to deal with their issues

  5. #5
    Her weight is most likely her own fault. She cannot - rather, she should not - be offended when she's chosen to live that lifestyle, and I think she's a bit pathetic for going to your manager to request you stop discussing your routines.
    Deathknight's do it using disease, blood and the power of the unholy. Warlocks do it with dark demons by their side. Mages do it with summoned arcane powers. Druids do it using the forces of nature. Rogues do it through stealth, poison's, shadows and....from behind. Paladins do it by calling to the light for aid. Shamans do it with the help of the elements. Priests do it through the holy light.
    But warriors....
    Warriors just fucking do it.

  6. #6
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    Sounds like a made-up story and a rhetorical question. But enjoy your new "fat people are hypocritical and lazy" thread. That was the only thing missing on this forum first page.

  7. #7
    The Lightbringer Harry Botter's Avatar
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    Im a big guy myself and have/am struggling keeping my weight down. Back injuries make it a little harder than it should. But eating right is helping me a great deal.

    When I hear people talk about things they do that are healthy it gives me ideas and motivation to try different things and push myself more than I usually do. Some people just don't like feeling like they're fat slobs and are too lazy to do anything at all to help themselves.

    Being 6'9" there is only so small I can go though, lol.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tech614 View Post
    I recommend some ice for your feet mate. With the trail of hot takes you're leaving in this thread they must be burning.

  8. #8
    The Undying Kalis's Avatar
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    You draw the line wherever the manager tells you to draw the line. They want a harmonious office, you were disrupting that and whether or not it was intentional on your part is irrelevant.

  9. #9
    Scarab Lord tj119's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Botter View Post
    Im a big guy myself and have/am struggling keeping my weight down. Back injuries make it a little harder than it should. But eating right is helping me a great deal.

    When I hear people talk about things they do that are healthy it gives me ideas and motivation to try different things and push myself more than I usually do. Some people just don't like feeling like they're fat slobs and are too lazy to do anything at all to help themselves.

    Being 6'9" there is only so small I can go though, lol.
    I'm in the same boat, I'm very healthy now even sitting around 270. I'm 6'7 and have weighed as much as 410ish at my heaviest. I used skinny people as motivation.

  10. #10
    The Lightbringer Harry Botter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tj119 View Post
    I'm in the same boat, I'm very healthy now even sitting around 270. I'm 6'7 and have weighed as much as 410ish at my heaviest. I used skinny people as motivation.
    I can't really get skinny skinny. I have always been a big built guy. I know where I want my weight to be for me to be happy and thats my goal. Hell, I dropped like 50 lbs at work one summer just from not drinking sodas and drinking all water and gatorade.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tech614 View Post
    I recommend some ice for your feet mate. With the trail of hot takes you're leaving in this thread they must be burning.

  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Botter View Post
    Im a big guy myself and have/am struggling keeping my weight down. Back injuries make it a little harder than it should. But eating right is helping me a great deal.

    When I hear people talk about things they do that are healthy it gives me ideas and motivation to try different things and push myself more than I usually do. Some people just don't like feeling like they're fat slobs and are too lazy to do anything at all to help themselves.

    Being 6'9" there is only so small I can go though, lol.
    This is how I would react too...which makes it difficult to understand the person in my OP.

    Best of luck with the back injuries!

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Kalis View Post
    You draw the line wherever the manager tells you to draw the line. They want a harmonious office, you were disrupting that and whether or not it was intentional on your part is irrelevant.
    Being told to stop talking about an innocent subject, and something that gives me and my colleague a buzz because someone is offended?
    Weird definition of harmony you got there.

    If someone told you to stop talking about one of your favourite subjects, because they're irrationally offended by it, would you?

  12. #12
    Stealthed Defender unbound's Avatar
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    Thoughts? I would guess you are not telling the whole story.

    My guess is that the two of you were talking loudly but spoke little about diet and nutrition. I would bet that you spent a good chunk of time making loud comments about how you look good especially compared to some while looking pointedly over at the woman who was at least trying.

  13. #13
    Scarab Lord tj119's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Botter View Post
    I can't really get skinny skinny. I have always been a big built guy. I know where I want my weight to be for me to be happy and thats my goal. Hell, I dropped like 50 lbs at work one summer just from not drinking sodas and drinking all water and gatorade.
    I'm very satisfied with my current weight, my family has always been full of giants...not really fat but all tall and thick men. Even my mother was 6'1.

  14. #14
    Mechagnome Xenyatta's Avatar
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    I think it's bullshit. If this is something you were talking about to yourselves about yourselves, why should she have ANY right to complain? How is your fitness making her feeling worthless? Because she's too fat to be bothered doing anything about it therefore no one else should?!

    I'm tired of the free pass fat people are trying to give themselves. "It's ok to be "curvy"." There is a difference between curvy and obese. "Let people live how they want to without shame." I get that and that's fine but then don't be offended when someone else appreciates what you hate. Don't condemn people for enjoying fitness when you prefer fatness. I thoroughly admit, it's easier to eat a cookie than it is to walk a mile but stop making excuses for being fat and overweight when you know it's your diet that's doing you in. Some people just can't lose it no matter how they diet or exercise. Some people are on medication that puts weight on even if you eat under 1400 cals and work out 4 days a week. For me, that's not the issue, the issue is people who eat like it's their job and/or choose not to do anything about it and then can't even admit their faults that gets me.

    Personally, I'd want to be rude AF to her but I'd bite my tongue and say something along the lines of, "I know you're not appreciating our personal conversations about dieting and fitness but this is something we enjoy. If it upsets you so much, why don't you join us? We could all work out together and we'll all talk about it together." She can't feel worthless if she's being included.

    If she declines, I'd say, "Ok that's your choice but the invitation is always open. But if it's all the same to you, "Mike" and I would still like to keep our conversation topic rolling being this is something we enjoy."

  15. #15
    Bloodsail Admiral Saeran's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kings Road View Post
    the grossly fat person we sit near
    Basically says it all about your poor attitude.

  16. #16
    The Undying Kalis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kings Road View Post
    Being told to stop talking about something that gives me and my colleague a buzz because someone is offended?
    Weird definition of harmony you got there.
    The manager's job is to oversee the entire department and make sure everybody is okay in the workplace, not just you and your mate.

  17. #17
    The Lightbringer Harry Botter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kings Road View Post
    This is how I would react too...which makes it difficult to understand the person in my OP.

    Best of luck with the back injuries!

    - - - Updated - - -



    Being told to stop talking about an innocent subject, and something that gives me and my colleague a buzz because someone is offended?
    Weird definition of harmony you got there.

    If someone told you to stop talking about one of your favourite subjects, because they're irrationally offended by it, would you?
    Thanks. unfortunately I need to get my fat under control soon because the nerves in my left leg are dying due to my injury and would rather not be a fat crippled fucker lol.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tech614 View Post
    I recommend some ice for your feet mate. With the trail of hot takes you're leaving in this thread they must be burning.

  18. #18
    I am Murloc! Grym's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kings Road View Post
    Being told to stop talking about an innocent subject, and something that gives me and my colleague a buzz because someone is offended?
    Weird definition of harmony you got there.
    If it is required by management, because for whatever reason it offends people and cause issue to the atmosphere, yes I would have to.

    Unless you don't care about the job then do as you wish.

  19. #19
    Quote Originally Posted by Xenyatta View Post
    I think it's bullshit. If this is something you were talking about to yourselves about yourselves, why should she have ANY right to complain? How is your fitness making her feeling worthless? Because she's too fat to be bothered doing anything about it therefore no one else should?!
    People have gotten fired for talking to each other in private and being overheard by people eavesdropping them before. Not like this is implausible.
    "Quack, quack, Mr. Bond."

  20. #20
    Banned Jayburner's Avatar
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    How come everyone on the internet is atleast 6'10"?

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