Women, gay men being creepy about touch / personal space

[Deleted]

Straight guys sexually harass straight men all the time.

Fixed that for you. The amount of stuff I've seen straight guys do to each other...

[theostrichsays]

I don't know how common the fear is, but it is fairly common for gay men to feel they don't have to respect some touch and personal space preferences, because to then it's not predatory because they're not attracted to your gender. The basis for the fear is real.

Do you think it's common to feel this way for women?

Yet how many times on this forum and on Reddit (and my own brother who is gay personal experiences) have I heard gay men complaining about women not respecting their space, nor their bodies, and touching, groping, grabbing them because its "not a big deal." Plus all the gay bars in Louisville I know of have had issues with straight women getting sloppy and at the minimum harrassing the crap out of the actual gay people (mostly men) that frequent them.

Hate to be the "what about the men" person here, but this is a subject that has some serious issues the other way.

[Cien]

I don't know how common the fear is, but it is fairly common for gay men to feel they don't have to respect some touch and personal space preferences, because to then it's not predatory because they're not attracted to your gender. The basis for the fear is real.

Do you think it's common to feel this way for women?

If they are its because you've allowed them to feel comfortable to do it and have not reprimanded them for doing it. Alot of people do this, hardly fair to limit on one sexuality, thats kind of discrimination.

[Zandalarian Paladin]

http://www.mmo-champion.com/search.p...rchid=23308241

11 posts, none related to Warcraft. Mostly related to some weird statements like this one. Good job OP.

[Cien]

Gay guys sexually harass straight men all the time. Report that shit in the work place and they make you look like the bigot who victimized them for doing what gay guys do, with the discrimination card.

Wow, please tell me more about your imaginatively conjured information source.

[Deleted]

He's not saying all gay men, but I'm sure some do it. It doesn't represent gays... there's just messed up people out there - gay and straight.

He said "all the time" which implies it's pretty common.

[Rukh]

I know plenty of gay people and they respect personal space just fine. This sounds like baseless paranoia.

[Osmeric]

If I know someone I'm fine with them touching me, but I don't take that as license to initiate touching.

I know plenty of gay people and they respect personal space just fine. This sounds like baseless paranoia.

And also this.

[Deleted]

Never seen this behavior before towards random strangers. Most of the time they seem to be very reluctant to instigate touch or physical contact of any sort outside of close friendships. Probably to avoid potential physical altercation which is the go-to response of most people being touched by strangers. But yeah, I've seen the occasional drunk homo grab a tit or ass in an attempt to prove his gay benefits to skeptical straight men. But I think that's more a case of drunk and stupid than it is about being gay.

[Spray]

"I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry" was just a movie and not every woman is like Jessica Biel, letting Adam Sandler's character touch her breasts just because she thought he's gay.

Just saying.

[Icathian]

People have different personalities (surprise).

Some of my friends are gay and they're actually one of the most respectful people I know. But one of their friends is gay and completely obnoxious and is constantly flirting with men he finds attractive. They actually don't like to hang out with him much because he's a walking gay stereotype.

[Lenonis]

The gay man/straight woman dynamic can be a bit odd and it is by no means universal.

There is a reason many gay bars have started banning bachelorette parties. Women can get horribly grabby at gay bars -- it ends up feeling like the gays are in a petting zoo for the women.

Gay men also can get grabby -- boob and ass get grabbed on a regular basis.

I'm not sure what the deal is -- but the lack of sexual nature of the contact is part of it I'm sure. It's something they could never do in a straight setting.

But it's not universal. I haaaaaaaaaate when people I don't know touch me. Unless they are super hot, then I might tolerate it.

[Deleted]

I'm not very experienced with gay people, but from what little I've observed, it also seems that girls are also very 'touchy' with gay guys as well.

[Darsithis]

I'm not like that in public. When I was younger, sometimes, yes, I could be like that, but as an adult I'm not interested in getting into stranger's personal space. I also deeply dislike being touched or even hugged by friends now. My partner, however, now he is fair game.

[Cyberowl]

I'm not like that in public. When I was younger, sometimes, yes, I could be like that, but as an adult I'm not interested in getting into stranger's personal space. I also deeply dislike being touched or even hugged by friends now. My partner, however, now he is fair game.

Stop raping your bf you monster!

[Auxora]

There are lots of people like that generally and it's common with all types of people including straight men, and it has nothing to do with sex or sexual preference. I'm not sure why the OP would think that sex or sexual preference has anything to do with it. In fact it's a little obnoxious to insinuate that. It's related to OCD, germaphobes, personality-types, etc. and nothing to do with sex.

For example, Howie Mandel is a famous straight male who is extremely sensitive about touch and personal space. He has talked about that at length in many interviews.

[Nurvus]

Please describe a bit more what you mean, I'm not sure I understood you correctly.

Some Gay men (usually those that think of themselves as a girl in a man's body) touch other women's boobs and ass, etc, like it's okay to do it because they're also "girls".
Except not even girls do that, and for some it can be creepy.
It's not obnoxious or oppressive, but it can be creepy and annoying.

But it's somewhat to be expected.
Assumed Gay people are naturally less inhibited than heterosexual people.

However, they need to be taught that it can be disrespectful to act that way, sometimes.

[Fasolina]

errr. speaking as a gay man I find your generalisations pretty damm offensive. Gay men are not more likely to be touchy feely than other men.

Stop thinking in stereotypes.

This... I really don't see anything here except generalizations and thinly veiled homophobia. There are "touchy-feely" people across the entire spectrum.

[Nurvus]

Thank you for making me exhale a bit more than usual. I have yet to meet such a gay man.

I have never seen a gay guy do that. Ever.

[Casagrande]

You can tell your friends that you would like them to give you a bit more personal space / be less touchy. Communication, etc.